Play Xbox 360 Lingo Bingo
by Vladimir Cole 
{ May 12th 2005 at 11:04AM }
The Joystiq crew will be liveblogging
the big Xbox 360 unveiling to be broadcast on MTV this
evening, but we need your help staying awake and cutting through the swarm of meaningless buzzwords that are likely to
tossed at viewers like cheap candy from a parade float.
We're looking for your suggestions! "HD Era" is a certainty, but what other marketingspeak are we likely to hear during this evening's special infomercial? We'll take your suggestions and whip up some printable bingo cards in time for the show so that you can play at home.
Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)
Kris Kling @ Dec 18th 2005 9:06PM
One word: microtransactions. Mu ha ha ha ha ha
Vladimir Cole @ Dec 18th 2005 9:06PM
To seed the list:
"HD Era"
"customizable gaming experience"
"sexy unit"
"digital lifestyle"
"remix generation"
fresh27 @ Dec 18th 2005 9:06PM
I'll be sure to stack my bingo cards with sure bets like "wireless" and "games."
Morgon @ Dec 18th 2005 9:06PM
"The Xbox Nation"
"Micro-Payments" (Maybe not 'marketspeak' per se, but you can pretty much put that in the free space in the center, since that'll be uttered a few dozen times..)
britkev1 @ Dec 18th 2005 9:06PM
"Revolutionary"
"Wireless"
"Exclusively"
Synthaxx R-or @ Dec 18th 2005 9:06PM
"Paradigm shift" - we heard this once, it sounded cool
"super customisation" - we'll emulate nokia and offer replacable fronts at considerable markup
"enhanced game experience" - it's got a joystick!
"good games" - EA is preparing a whole slew of ripoff games right now
"slimline design" - so it's only a couple of cm shorter than the original, white is slimming!
"revolutionary processing" - because we put 3 processors in it, you can also use it as a spaceheater!
"wireless" - we'll gladly sell you the xbox 360 propriatary non rechargable batteries too
okay, bring on the ps3 ;)
Fady Ibrahim @ Dec 18th 2005 9:06PM
How about...
Next-Gen
Cutting Edge
Micro Transactions
Massively Multiplayer
Xbox Live (that's my middle freebie square)
802.11a/b/g
Media Center 2005
I don't know if that's market speak per se, but I'm sure these would come up.
Vladimir Cole @ Dec 18th 2005 9:06PM
Some more:
"i want one"
"inexpensive"
"can i touch it?"
"empowering gamers" or "empowers gamers"
"prioprietary technology"
"limited supply"
"product of the year"
"so cool"
"ergonomic design"
Eric Pobirs @ Dec 18th 2005 9:06PM
This is a sales pitch to consumers. GDC was a sales pitch to businesses. Any variation of the phrase 'micropayments' is very unlikely to be heard. It'll be put in terms conprehensible to those who never been introduced to the concept previously.
#6 Actually, the point of having three simplified cores rather than a big desktop/server type CPU is too avoid the power and heat issues that would come of that, as seen in the previous Xbox. The trade off is having to produce good multi-threaded code, which is a new area for most game developers.
KD @ Dec 18th 2005 9:06PM
complete intergration
vision for the next generation
highly anticipated
connected
hot next-generation games
revolution
Small fee
Zachary @ Dec 18th 2005 9:06PM
You can quote me later as having said "I can't believe i'm watching f'ing MTV"
I'm just going to tivo it so I don't have to sit through 15 minutes of commercials and a 'performance' by the killers, bleh!!!!!!
funkonaut @ Dec 18th 2005 9:06PM
"That's hot!"
"Like..."
"I'm a huge gamer."
"Damn!"
"Beotch!"
"Fo shizzle"
David @ Dec 18th 2005 9:06PM
highly anticipated
Xbox vision
next generation
user experience
connected
personalized
never-before-seen
action-packed
global network
Vladimir Cole @ Dec 18th 2005 9:06PM
"under the hood"
"futuristic"
"game over" (in reference to Sony/Nintendo consoles)
"revolution" (to mess with Nintendo's unveiling)
"virtual, world-wide arena"
"future of entertainment"
"behind-the-scenes"
Eric Pobirs @ Dec 18th 2005 9:06PM
If this follows the pattern of previous product parties with a lot of B-list celebs on hand, the amount of actual content gamers can draw useful info from will be maybe 5-8 minutes out of the whole half-hour.
Having a DVR really justifies itself for this kind of thing. I can really live without sound bites from disinterested overpaid actors from the latest BH90210 variant.
PhilJ @ Dec 18th 2005 9:06PM
"Are those real?"
(couldn't resist)
Tim @ Dec 18th 2005 9:06PM
"Project Xenon"
"Frodo"
"Interactive experience"
"And now.... The Killers!!"
RainCityTL @ Dec 18th 2005 9:06PM
"unified gaming experience"
"change the way you play games"
"expand your living room experience"
sam @ Dec 18th 2005 9:06PM
Here are some I like:
Hobbit
Frodo
Orc
convergence
Japanese developers
murph @ Dec 18th 2005 9:06PM
"Halo 2.5"
Handsome Jon @ Dec 18th 2005 9:06PM
"xbox 360" for the center spot!
Ashley Bennett @ Dec 18th 2005 9:06PM
Integration
Cross Platform? Maybe thats too techie...
K @ Dec 18th 2005 9:06PM
Sorry to mention your competition, but Kotaku will be publishing details and photos right at 9:30 (if you want to avoid the MTV noise). Apparently he signed a non-disclosure and has some inside info he's writing at the moment.
pOThOLDERS @ Dec 18th 2005 9:06PM
hoochie mama
Xbox360-forums.com @ Dec 18th 2005 9:06PM
"utilise developer's resources more"
Ajay Shrivastav @ Dec 18th 2005 9:06PM
Checkout leaked DOA4 screenshots at the following link.
http://www.gaming-age.com/news/2005/5/12-48
David Gallo @ Dec 18th 2005 9:06PM
"gamecard"
"digital lifestyle"
"living room"
Exbzurg @ Dec 18th 2005 9:06PM
they will probally call the mircrotransistions "customization options".
Eric P @ Dec 18th 2005 9:06PM
Who wants to put money down that tonight will suck? It's gonna be a bunch of actors talking about "gaming dude", and "next generation is gonna rock!", "I play Halo with my friends". Because if M$ can get teeny boppers to "connect" with popular people who game, they will want to game as well. "The Killers game??!!!! I want to play what they play! I'm such a big fan!"
It's gonna be presented like one extra loooong music video, and we'll see 2.5 second long shots of the console and people playing games, with lots of background music blasting through. It's gonna give every person over 16 a headache. That's my prediction - put your 16 year old hormonally over stimulated cap on, and ask yourself what would get you to beg the parents for the next 6 months to buy you a 360?
The real dirt is still next week people...no BITCHIN and moanin tomorrow because you are dissapointed!