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Reader Comments (73)

Posted: Dec 18th 2005 9:05PM (Unverified) said

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So, if I'm 16, can I still get hired? I can fulfill all of the other requirements, but I'm a minor.

Posted: Dec 18th 2005 9:05PM (Unverified) said

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I'm not sure why people continue to ask about what the pay is? It seems terribly unprofessional to ask before you even get the interview.

So, if they don't pay you enough, then you don't want to waste your time writing out some articles and persue your dream of being a video game reviewer?

Posted: Dec 18th 2005 9:05PM (Unverified) said

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I'd love this.


I've already got degrees in English and Computer Science, and I'm halfway through a law degree.

If I get some gaming credentials I can probably work my way into debating Jack Thompson on CNN, haha.

Posted: Dec 18th 2005 9:05PM (Unverified) said

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Good news everybody! I applied. I'm sure Joystiq will soon feature writing so sweet it'll have people saying KotakWHO?


Posted: Dec 18th 2005 9:05PM (Unverified) said

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Doh! I posted this in a Blog over a month old. Here it is where it actually might get noticed.

Joystiq is a daily stop since I first surfed over here. I come for the content and quality. Fantastic stuff! Keep it up. Glad to hear that quality people are applying.

Slightly off topic, I am really looking forward to Joystiq reviews. I was delighted to read that you are giving yourselves some flexibility in format and content.

I am pasting another example (the first being PA's "review" of Double Dash that I linked in the "Joystiq Review format blog") of what I consider to be a 10/10 review (the review itself being perfect - not the game it reviews).

From 26 October 2005 Penny Arcade (I would link it but the link would be obsolete in a day):

"Having bested Shadow of the Colossus at the culmination of a three a.m. ultrasession, I'm confident that I know what there is to know about the title. Let me tell you that by the end, I was only beating that game because it was the closest I could come to physically beating the team that developed it. I was manhandling them by proxy. This isn't to say that I did not experience several profound moments while playing through it. The epic scale of some encounters is moving on a primal level. The understated story, "told" largely through inference, was not trite, irrelevant, or insulting! This is exceedingly rare. What I am saying, however, is that those ublime moments are largely transient. I am not of the opinion that their technology is up to the task they have set before it. I respect that reating a platform game with arbitrary, often organic surfaces - hairy mounds, spinal ridges, etcetera - represents completely original technical challenges. However, I do not grant that because they have attempted something difficult they're entitled to oral sex from me or any other person for manifesting some portion of their vision.

The idea is potent. Whenever their maddening technology doesn't obscure it, the power of that idea will seize the machinery of your conscious mind."

Posted: Dec 18th 2005 9:05PM (Unverified) said

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Well after reading the update, I guess I have a qualification that might boost me up a little. I don't have WoW, so you won't lose me to any mmorpg any time soon. Now if the Revolution can make an mmo with realistic sword play on the other hand.....

Posted: Dec 18th 2005 9:05PM (Unverified) said

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Any updates? Have you made any decision regarding Joystiqs new blogger?

Posted: Dec 18th 2005 9:05PM (Unverified) said

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I haven't even finished the first screening. There are some majorly good applications in this bunch.

Posted: Dec 18th 2005 9:05PM (Unverified) said

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^_^ yah!

I was sweating it. Good luck to all of you guys

Posted: Dec 18th 2005 9:05PM (Unverified) said

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Dammit, I missed this article. >.< I've always wanted to blog here. *hits head* I think I would qualify too. Oh well, another guy will get it. :P

Posted: Dec 18th 2005 9:05PM (Unverified) said

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You know vc, that's great news. Hope had all but died in my heart. I was surly to loved ones, and was almost physically ill with waves of depression. I feel all like Charlie Bucket when he found out the last Golden Ticket was a fake. I've gotta go tell Grandpa Joe.

Posted: Dec 18th 2005 9:05PM (Unverified) said

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Any chance that we can still apply?

Posted: Dec 18th 2005 9:05PM (Unverified) said

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Hey Justin, if you get a golden ticket... tell me. I'll trade your golden ticket for two of my Oompa Loompas =D.

Posted: Dec 18th 2005 9:05PM (Unverified) said

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Yeah...highly anticipating the 1st screening results and seeing where I stand. I had a great time writing that application and, despite the apparent competition, am happy that Joystiq has an intelligent group of readers worthy of adding to the blog's integrity. Oh, and I'm taking the golden ticket. Lock those Oompa Loompas in the cage where they belong...freaks.

Posted: Dec 18th 2005 9:05PM (Unverified) said

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Give me that.

*takes the key and opens the cage*

In case you didnt know, Oompa Loompas are people too you know. Mr. Bell gets minus points for being a people hater... tsk tsk. OOMPA LOOMPAS... AATTTAACCCKK!!!!

Posted: Dec 18th 2005 9:05PM (Unverified) said

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Attack? That's not the Oompa Loompa way. There'd be spectacular, synchronized dancing followed by an ironic accident.

Posted: Dec 18th 2005 9:05PM (Unverified) said

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And then they would make fun of your obvious character flaws and kick you out of the factory.

I thought it was kinda strange that they would kick out a fat kid considering a chocolate factory probably helped him get that way and they make a lot of money off of him.

Posted: Dec 18th 2005 9:05PM (Unverified) said

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Fine... if you want a show then a show is what you'll get. Hit it.

Oompa Loompa: "Is this thing on... *cough*..."

"Oompa Loompa... Oompa di doo.
We have a problem and it's just for you.

Christopher Bell, Christopher Bell.
Locked us up in a really small cell.
He called us names, He said we are freaks...
The job of a blogger is what he seeks.

MD Tek... is our hero it seems,
now Mr. Bell will get what's coming to him.
Ludwig said, we shouldn't attack.
should we hit him for the common sense he lacks?

A bat and a pipe. We carry with a smile.
This is how we do it San Andreas style."

Let's give my Oompa Loompas a hand shall we. *Clap clap*

Just remember boys and girls... you can't spell "Slaughter" without "Laughter"

Posted: Dec 18th 2005 9:05PM (Unverified) said

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Oh dear, I almost had a seizure there. One of my staffers once wrote a review (Timesplitters 2) entirely in limerick form. It haunted my nightmares for a week.

Posted: Dec 18th 2005 9:05PM (Unverified) said

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Haunted you for weeks... hahaha. Hey sorry about the "should we hit him for the common sense he lacks" line. Couldn't think of anything that rhymed with "attack" at that moment that a Level 70 Oompa Loompa would say. No hard feelings I pressume.

Posted: Dec 18th 2005 9:05PM (Unverified) said

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My virtual feelings remain intact.

Posted: Dec 18th 2005 9:05PM (Unverified) said

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So is there any update on this? Has it progressed to round two yet?

Posted: Dec 18th 2005 9:05PM (Unverified) said

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Yeah I'm kinda wondering what happened too, it has been awhile. Has the first round of qualifiers already been chosen? Will we be receiving "sorry to inform you.." letters?

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