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Reader Comments (20)

Posted: Dec 18th 2005 10:09PM (Unverified) said

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I guess two hours of pure suck is better than four. I bet a total of 50 people see the first one, with 2 of those 50 seeing the sequal.
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Posted: Dec 18th 2005 10:09PM (Unverified) said

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I didn't think you could actually act badly in a photo, but this proves me wrong. Boll has a tendency to bring out the worst actor in everybody. I think this is going to be just as hilarious as House of the Dead. Count me in.
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Posted: Dec 18th 2005 10:09PM (Unverified) said

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Holy Sh*t- is that Burt Reynolds?
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Posted: Dec 18th 2005 10:09PM (Unverified) said

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http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0460780/
This is a star packed movie! They never fail :P
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Posted: Dec 18th 2005 10:09PM (Unverified) said

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Holy crap that is Burt Reynolds. I had to look it up on IMDB just to make sure it was real. I mean Burt Reynolds! Seriously! I may have to watch this for the pure absurdity of it all. A 4-hour fantasy epic directed by Uwe Boll and starring Burt Reynolds? That's just astounding! How did this get made? Who signed this deal? They must have agreed to it due to the unintentional-comedy potential alone.

And look at the rest of the cast. Jason Statham, John Rhys-Davies, Ray Liotta, Ron Pearlman... what dirt is Boll blackmailing these guys with? I just don't understand...
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Posted: Dec 18th 2005 10:09PM (Unverified) said

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---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"what dirt is Boll blackmailing these guys with? I just don't understand..."
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Maybe they're addicted to crack and uwe boll is their supplier?
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Posted: Dec 18th 2005 10:09PM (Unverified) said

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This movie needs one of the following actors to be good:

1)Buford T. Justice from "Smokey and the Bandit". (oops Jackie Gleason is dead...)
2) Dom DeLuise. Burt is not funny unless Dom Deluise is in the movie.

On second thought, these movies will suck.
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Posted: Dec 18th 2005 10:09PM (Unverified) said

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Or just addicted to crap.
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Posted: Dec 18th 2005 10:09PM (Unverified) said

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Same supplier, though.
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Posted: Dec 18th 2005 10:09PM (Unverified) said

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CURSE THE GOD WHO ALLOWD MATTHEW LILLARD TO BE IN THIS MOVIE!

THANK GOD FOR YE JASON STATHAM

I SPIT ON JOHN RHYS-DAVIES KUS HE LOOKS TOO MUCH LIKE SEAN CONNERY. AND I HATE CONNERY.

Ray Liotta is cool...

DIE, LEELEE SOBIESKI, YOU WRETCHED WITCH!

AHHH!!! GOD NOO!!!! BURT REYNOLDS!!!!!!!

I ONLY HOPE THAT JASON STATHAM CAN BRING FORTH THE BACKBONE OF THIS MOVIE! JUST LIKE HE DID IN THE TRANSPORTER!
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Posted: Dec 18th 2005 10:09PM (Unverified) said

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Dear god, why has no one stopped this man from making movies yet?

He think's he's a cross between Stephen Spielberg and Quentin Tarantino, but he's really a cross between Ed Wood and a steaming pile of cow dung.
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Posted: Dec 18th 2005 10:09PM (Unverified) said

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My bad - ALLOWD - *Allowed

Correct me and you shall be STRUCK DOWN from the heavens!
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Posted: Dec 18th 2005 10:09PM (Unverified) said

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Ray is actually an exceptional actor and I've always really liked him. He's like a less slime-ball version of John Travolta.

Not that John is that bad either.
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Posted: Dec 18th 2005 10:09PM (Unverified) said

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If this were an independent movie a la Boogie Nights or something, this cast would be amazing. Instead Boll's got them slumming it through a movie based on a game that no one plays that was a knock off of Diablo to begin with. There's some twisted evil at work there.

Boll has stated that he gets his casts by making inquiries with definite cash up front at the last minute. This way an actor without a gig lined up goes "well, it's some quick cash and I don't have anything going". In other words, he doesn't give them time to think about the part. It's hilarious he admits this. This is also why his movies suck so badly in part. They don't have time to cohere as a cast whatsoever and it's usually a group who have shown up for the paychecks.

But yeah Burt Reynolds in a fantasy film is awesome. I like how they kinda tried to make him look like Sean Connery in the poster. I wonder if he'll try and speak with a fake British accent. I'll bet you he doesn't even bother.

And screw you Dmitri, I briefly met Leelee Sobieski and a) she's way beyond your league b) she's actually intensely beautiful and c) she's sharp and nice. But her date was this midget who looked like he was a professional jazz hands dancer or something. Lots of dudes that night were talking about that none too happily.

Someone said the comments on the chocolate milk jonesing asshead yelling at his mom was funny, but this ruled. "Bad acting on a poster". Ahahaah.
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Posted: Dec 18th 2005 10:09PM (Unverified) said

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Not Impressed (Dmitri) believes in the mantra:

CAPS LOCK: It's like cruise control for AWESOME!!
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Posted: Dec 18th 2005 10:09PM (Unverified) said

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Wtf. Why was my post removed because I said Chiablo had problems with his eyes?
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Posted: Dec 18th 2005 10:09PM (Unverified) said

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so does that mean that this is now a "straight to double dvd" movie?
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Posted: Dec 18th 2005 10:09PM (Unverified) said

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SN: "Zing".
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Posted: Dec 18th 2005 10:09PM (Unverified) said

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Just how much Nazi money does this guy have left to launder? Please make it stop!
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Posted: Dec 18th 2005 10:09PM (Unverified) said

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Uwe Boll exists for only one purpose: To make Paul T. Anderson look good.
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