Joystiq

When Microsoft said that they'd make the Xbox 360 nearly impossible to hack, they were not kidding. Boy, that's some serious security they got going on this box here. Check back in a minute — we're going to pull out all the stops. The text says "If seal is broken check contents before accepting."

Look out, hackaday! Joystiq just created the first Xbox 360 mod. Breakin' all the rules. They told us "THIS SIDE UP" we said, "pshaw, watch this, suckas." As far as mods go, this one's pretty functional. You can see that the box still retains its original horizontal top surface, allowing for placement of coffee, books, what have you.

Here we are making the first cut. First blood! Check out the dangerous, FPS-style camera-work. Do not attempt this at home.

At this point we had to put down the knife for a few minutes and take some deep breaths. The adrenaline was pumping and we could have damaged the packaging or something.

Ooh ooh — here's our first peek of a box inside a box. This next box looks quite special. It's got a series of concentric green rings on it that gives us a feeling of deja vu. Where have we seen this pattern before? Oh come here pretty lady.

 

And here it is! The Xbox 360 box. It's pretty special. We get the feeling that the design of this box was focus grouped to no end. Check out the high-quality, glossy paper used in the construction. You can catch your reflection in that box if you do it just right. Why yes, that is a GameCube controller on the sofa, sharp-eyed reader.

The green sticker on the box says "BONUS MEDIA REMOTE (Limited time only, while supplies last). It's definitely a sticker, not a cheap print-on. No expense was spared in this kit, folks. This box just oozes quality.

Now we're going to need some reader assistance with the photo above. We're not quite sure what this component is, but we swear on our signed DS that this item came out of the box. Any guesses? There's not a word in the product manual about it, so drop us a tip if you've got any idea.

At right: a shot of the interior of the box. We're glad that we conducted this disrobing ritual alone, because at this point, we would not have been able to pass off our excitement as a BONUS MEDIA REMOTE in our pocket.

From this vantage point, we can make out a metallic brief case and two green pouches. We also see even more boxes inside, one of them with an indentation that will make it easy for us to pull the box out. Gosh, they thought of everything! This is seriously the best unboxing ever at this point.

At right, the metallic briefcase that contains some objects. We haven't cracked it open yet, but we're sure that this case is quite spacious. It's also pretty sturdy and appears to be made of aluminum. It's got a combo lock on the top that takes 3 numbers. Help us, reader: what three numbers will open this case?

One reader suggested that we try the combination "666." No such luck. The box didn't open. We need to try a different, three-number code. Anyways, moving on. We're sure someone will figure it out.

This next photo is quite interesting. In it, we hold one of the green packages up to the light. Note the translucent property of the bag and the white writing upon the bag in multiple languages. You can't see it too well from the photo, but there are icons on the bag. One of them is a triangle with the number 4 inside of it, meaning that this bag is recyclable, but since nobody takes #4 plastic, you'd have to throw this bag out in order to get rid of it. Why anybody would recycle (nevermind throw out!) such a beautiful bag is beyond us.

The next icon is a Japanese word inside a square recycling icon. Do they recycle #4 plastic in Japan? If so, that's clearly an indication that this product was designed with the Japanese consumer in mind.

The next icon shows a picture of a baby holding this bag with a cross through it. We think this means "Don't have babies or you won't get to play Xbox 360" but it may also mean "this bag is not large enough to hold fat babies."

Next up is an icon of a child with the bag over his head, looking dismayed that he can see out of the bag. Someone should explain the translucency property to him. They should also explain that it may become difficult to breathe with a bag over his head. But honestly, if you let this well-designed bag fall into your child's careless hands, you deserve whatever damage should befall your bag. Put this bag away in a safe place, the last icon says.

This is the box that holds the power supply for the test kit. This is not the box that holds the power supply for the retail unit. We photograph it here because this is an unpacking ritual, and it would be a crime to omit a single corrugated cutiepie. Boxes are hot. We think you agree.

Anybody keeping score? At this point, we've got the big box, the pretty box that the Xbox 360 resides inside of, the power supply box, another large box that contains the review kit, and an aluminum box. We're a good way towards 360 boxes. Our excitement level rises.

Pictured above, a smaller, white box. We have not shown this box before, and we believe this is the very first photo ANYWHERE on the entire Internet of this box. This one doesn't have the shiny cardboard of the retail box, and is very light. We wonder what's in it?

Nothing's in it! That's what's in it! This is a complete and utter shocker. We open our very first box and absolutely nothing is in it, which is perfectly cool by us, because we don't have any pesky electronics to discard. It's all about the boxes.

Now this next shot is going to require some setup. We opened the box containing the review kit and took out all of the pesky electronics to get a clean view of the awesome styrofoam structures inside of it. These bone-like supports are positively architectural, with clean, modern lines and a Corbusier-like white austerity. We're enamored of the designer that put these together.

Pictured at right, another plastic bag. At this point I wanted to call my wife and tell her to stop triple-bagging groceries at the supermarket. "Honey," I wanted to say, "you don't have to steal grocery bags anymore! I've hit the motherload! We're set for LIFE!"

This bag, which once contained the Xbox 360 review kit, is definitely large enough for some human babies, and the icons on it warn against letting said babies get ahold of the bag, for they might chew on it or otherwise damage its mint condition.

It's also quite likely that this is the first look online at the white bag. We've shown you green bags, we've shown you white bags. We are esctatic, and very hopeful that more bags will be included.

In the photo above, we opt to give you, our readers, a little manual stimulation. That's right, a shot of the manuals in their bags. Pristine. Mint. And they're staying that way. Getting finger oil on these babies totally ruins their aftermarket value.

This photo above may very well send some of you over the top. In it, we show you our very favorite part of every electronics unboxing ritual. The peeling of protective plastic film. We love peeling these things off. What's so fantastic about them is once they're off, your product is incontrovertibly deflowered: you are never getting that plastic back on. The product is changed forever.

Above: an orange bag. ORANGE! Completely unexpected. There's really not much we can say about this bag. We had to sit down for a moment because we felt woozy at this point in the unpacking ritual.

 

Above, another great bag, this one more than a foot long, as shown by the real human foot included in the photo for scale. There are so many bags, we want to show you them all! Patience.

Above, the unpacked Xbox 360 box. It was a lot of hard work, but we've done it! A successful unpacking!

At right, a photo of a pretty draconian placard stating one of the laws that governs my building and the disposal of boxes. We are not allowed to put boxes down the chute (no worries there, lol, as we'd never throw out these beautifully designed boxes) but does the word "Xbox" not also include the word "box" within it? Therefore we are not allowed to just toss it down the chute marked "rubbish."

And we checked, but the electronics components that served to support the boxes and keep them from caving in have no little handy recycling information on the bottom. Therefore, these items don't really belong in the recycling bin either.

In the end, we just decided to leave it all out for the building super to deal with. That's why we're paying this crazy rent anyways, right?

What's cool is that once we cleared our apartment of all the electronics junk, we were able to enjoy our boxes without distraction. And that's what we're doing now. We've got lots of coverage planned for the next several days as we get to know the boxes that were sent to us, so stay tuned for more details, including our "hands on" experience with the boxes.

Oh, we almost forgot: we finally figured out the combination for that aluminum case. In the next photo we'll show you that box's interior.

Update: A mysterious box appeared on the balcony of the Playgirlz bloggers and drama unfolds.