Five things I hate about games

On point #5, have you read Stephen Johnson's "Everything Bad is Good for You"?

5. Fanboys who act like the sun shines out of their console's AV port.
4. People who somehow think that they can see the future. (I'm looking at you, PS3 and Rev bashers.)
3. Look, the pistol was supposed to be a support weapon. If it was put H2, combined with dual weilding, one'd end up with a two second kill. Suck it up, and use the BR.
2. The PC power curve. I have a six-year old computer that can't even play games from 2002, for cryin' out loud.
1. The whole cloak-and-dagger around upcoming games and consoles.
//33. (2)Because pistol+dual weilding=unbalanced gameplay.The pistol was intended to be a support weapon in the first place.
(5)Heaven forbid they actually try to, y'know, make controlling games easier.
//37. I have a Wacom Tablet off getting repairs. It sarted breaking in the first month, and was useless by the fourth. Agreed.
//41.(5) And consoles don't?
(2)Agreed.
//45. (2) So you're a sequelist?

1. Like Vladimir Cole says, The mis-conception that video games are for kids irks me to no end. Would somebody please explain this to my girlfriend? I don't think I'm getting through.

2. The lack of engaging story-lines. Video games have matured since my 2600 days, and so should the stories. Engage me, make a political statement, stop treating me like a child.

3. Deadlines and the bottom line. Take the time to develop a good game, thoroughly test it, and stop releasing titles with obvious glitches. Rushing a game out because of a deadline solely to boost quarterly profits is hurting innovation.

4. Amateur video game reviewers. I have no problem with a person giving a review (provided the game was ACTUALLY played), but articulate your thoughts, qualify your comparisons, and be comprehensive. "THIS GAME IS SO AWESOME!!!!" does not a good review make.

Let me know how old you are, provide some hint to your gaming background - a kid's idea of a good game will probably not be an adult's.

And for the love of everything that is holy, stop butchering the language. Use punctuation, capitalize the appropriate words. Hit the space bar and enter/return button on occasion (the big one by your right pinky finger on the home row). I hear it can start a new paragraph.

5. Parents. I'm 28 and never have I seen such apathy concerning the upbringing of kids. There is no discipline and kids fear no consequence. Too often parenting is substituted with passivity and friendship, but what kids need and will always need is guidance, knowledge, and the benefit of your experience. Stop pointing fingers of blame at the gaming industry, accept responsibility, and actively go about changing how your child is influenced.

6. Jack Thompson. That one's a freebie.

1) FPS that move too fast. I get motion sick playing Half Life on any system. I hate that when I go up or down a stairwell I spend most of my time with my face to the wall. Why can't all FPS have you move at a realistic pace with the ability to sprint when needed? Mohaa and Call of Duty on the PC were perfect in terms of pacing.

2) Next gen consoles bragging about graphics. Graphics are nice, but they don't guarantee a fun game. Do I really care if I can tell what emotion my superior officer is conveying through facial expressions as he tells me what my next mission is? NO. I want a fun mission.

3) Price for next gen games. So those better graphics are gonna cost me more, but the gameplay is the same as the scaled down version on another system? Put more effort into good AI, I'll pay more for a game that really makes me work to beat it.

4) All the nintendo haters. At least Nintendo is trying to move the industry toward greater interactivity. Nintendo is more likely to bring us a true Gamecube that you walk into than Sony or Microsoft.

5) Sony's lack of cross funtionality. I love Sony, but, why don't they have a UMD slot on the PS3. Then I could watch movies, or play my PSP games on it. It would ensure the success of the UMD format. Hell, if they came out with a writable version, you could use it for saves, music downloads, classic game downloads from an online service (similar to what Microsoft offers)... oh the possibilities.

if you can't get your wife to at least play katamari damacy or princess peach, you shouldn'ta married her

Posted by Jake:

"I actually compete in a few game leagues, mostly FPS and my teams always do fairly well."

So you do compete in videogame tournaments, yet you posted this...

"the whole pro gamer thing is just another advertising ploy designed to destroy our free will and make us robots."

So basically you're just another a tool of the industry's market engineering. Nice.

I don't believe you actually play any games competitively BTW, I think you were just trying to salvage your position on the issue, but you did the exact opposite.

"I wish I could put enough time in it so I could be, but I'd rather put that time into other "IRL" things that actually give back."

And of course, no anti-pro gaming movement argument would be complete without the "I have a life" angle.

"Oh, your inability to criticize with out name calling speaks volumes about you."

I'm sorry I named called you, but your original quote was not only trite, but just downright silly.


-Syn

Hmm... I didn't read what anyone posted before me, so I wouldn't be influenced. I'm from Europe so that explains my first two points:

1. sometimes bad translations - some titles don't even get translated into German at all, they simply release the english version here
2. delayed releases here in Europe
3. gamers have a bad image in the general public - at least here in Germany
4. games get bought based on their advertising and not based on their reviews
5. eSports is still undeveloped in the western countries

Games should make us smarter, better humans. They should lubricate neural pathways

Any game that has any sort of problem solving, puzzles, and other stuff already does this. More so than most fiction books that you'll read, which are basically entertainment, like movies or games.

Hmm..

6. Loading...: Loading screens irk me to no end. If loading screens are going to be implemented, please make them short. Jet Set Radio Future had loading screens one or two seconds long. Nintendo titles have NO loading screens.

If they absolutely NEED to be in, make them INTERESTING. Katamari and Star Wars Battlefront/2 both have some nice loading screens.

5. Drawn-out franchises: I can understand a Jak Trilogy, or the Boktai games, or Advance Wars, and even Zelda. But some franchises are whored out so much. EA and 2K are prime examples. EVERY YEAR, there is a new football game, basketball game, hockey game and the like. If they were improving it amazingly each time, I wouldn't blame them- but few improvements every year?

4. Mario Sports: Don't get me wrong, I generally prefer Mario sports titles over a serious sports game. But if you took Mario away, and made it a professional title, or even just replaced it with quirky guys like in SEGA Soccer Slam, it would still be fun as hell. Mario is simply slapped on there for marketting, and that angers me.

3. Saving: No, I'm not complaining that you CAN save, but rather how it is done. I've always prefered to choose my file from the menu and have the game automatically overwrite THAT FILE. My brothers and I have accidently saved over eachother's file a few times- and while still ou faults- is ANNOYING AS HELL. Put yourself in my shoes; after playing Jet Set Radio Future for a week- and beating it- your brother saves over your file.

Also, what's up with all this confirmation? Usually it's not too bad, simply asking if you're sure you want to overwrite, but some games- Star Wars Battlefront/2 spring to mind- prompt you with FIVE FUCKING SCREENS.

2. Game reviews: I find very few gamne reviewers to be good sources. In fact, I usually ignore them and ask people if they actually liked it. Games are always rated very high, and now 6 is average whereas anything below is crap.

Not only that, but reviews are biased. If the game gets 6+, the reviewer will always try to point out everything good about it. If not, the reviewer ATTACKS THE GAME. What's up with that? Why not attacking good games? I'd like to see some actual CRITISM on these, thanks.

1. "INNOVATION PLZ": Have you actually seen the results of innovative titles? Very, very few have succeeded. There was.. uh, Katamari.. Shadow of the Colossus.. that's pretty much it. Innovation needs to be taken in small steps; adding new ideas in here and there. Metal Gear is a good example- while you're supposed to be stealthy, there are still plenty of weapons you can use for killing. I can wholeheartedly say that MGS wouldn't be such a huge success if it was only stealth.

5 Solutions to all your problems:

1) The portable device trade-off:

It's called a DS, Play-Yan, Opera Web-browser, and the new PDA-like capabilites. Yeah, the screen "is smaller" but heck, grow a pair (of eyes).

2)Just-for-kids perceptions: Brain Age (ds) for seniors, Legend of Zelda: Twiglight Princess (GCN) for adults, Nintendogs for the kids, and Mario Kart for everyone. There, now we got a family-centered idea. By the way, a majority of writers (like That Norris moron from CNN and the stupid SpikeTV/G4 shows) aren't gamers like you and I. So lay off on their moron-ness until they give you a job there to lay down the down low.

My wife won't play 'em: Mine does. It's called Teal or Pink DS, Super Princess Peach, Animal Crossing, Nintendodogs *BF Version*, Yoshi's Touch N Go, and Super Mario 64 DS's card games. All good ones for her to start and get hooked. For GCN you got Mario Tennis, Soccer, and Party. Mario is the answer to all your problems. Stop playing Halo, be a man, and play Animal Crossing.

Exergaming is too lame: In the future, Buy a Nintendo Revolution. Better yet, get a GameCube and buy DDR: MARIO MIX and solve the problem above and this problem in one.

Games aren't educational enough:

Big Brain Academy
Brain Age: Train Your Brain in Minutes a Day
Brain Twisting Game Vol. 1
Let's toss in Chibi Robo for good measure (teaches responsiblity) as well as ACGC and ACWW. Both teach alot, too, even through their "cute"ness.

My only problem with games is how everyone seems to forget Nintendo is working on fixing all that is wrong, yet get blamed for not doing enough.
Oh yeah, and that dog from paperboy. Damn dog.....

Conn wrote:

4. Mario Sports: Don't get me wrong, I generally prefer Mario sports titles over a serious sports game. But if you took Mario away, and made it a professional title, or even just replaced it with quirky guys like in SEGA Soccer Slam, it would still be fun as hell. Mario is simply slapped on there for marketting, and that angers me.

Ya know, Next level Games (SEGA Soccer Slam creators) made Super Mario Strikers and I think did a decent job. They just screwed up with the last team. A ROBOT TEAM, FOR BOWSER? HE'S NOT ROBOTNIK, DUMBASSES!

Anyway, Mario Sports is best when done by Camelot, but when Nintendo outsources it, it comes off as you said because we've been spoiled by the good games Camelot makes. So here's to Camelot getting future licenses.

I'm not saying that Mario sports games are bad- but that they should not feature Mario.

Initially I found the last point slightly stereotypical but then I realised how good an observation it was.

It also ties in nicely to the 'games are for children' point. Unlike books or films, which take on board (not always, by a long shot! But the Citizen Kane's and the Dostoevsky's) may political or philosophical themes, games have gotten into a rut with their shallow stories. This is probably because of the emphasis on gameplay, which we benefit from, but how long will we have to wait before a game as poignant as a film like 'Hotel Rwanda' or as complex in its themes and messages as 'Hamlet'? I'm sure it's possible, and when it happens games will be more powerful and successful at it then any other media; only games can incorporate text, cinema, and interaction. But so far, the depth in games comes from layers of plot and mystery (e.g. the G-man of Half Life fame) and not intellectual exploration.

(Of course, judging by the length of the the replies already, I doubt anyone is actually going to read this. Oh well.)

Hey Syn... :oP

I don't get it. Are you giving me the finger or something?



-Kimosabae