What is best in life?
To crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and hear the lamentations of their women. Oh, and
playing Funco's massively multi-player Age
of Conan: Hyborian Adventures on your Xbox 360 wouldn't be so bad either. Gamespot's Rumor
Control column tackles the likelyhood that Robert E. Howard's brawny hero will battle-axe his way on to our
favorite console:
Like most MMORPGs, Age of Conan is PC-exclusive. However, that may change, according
to a GAF poster. Said poster claims to have a friend who attended a question-and-answer session held by Funcom, the
Norwegian developer of Age of Conan.
According to the poster, the Funcom developers "showed a trailer with a pretty intense draw distance
apparantly [sic] as well as Conan himself wielding a morning star which seemed totally realistic in how the spiked ball
would behave due to its weight and momentum." Then, "a question was asked about if they were thinking about
other platforms than PC...then the spokesman [Bjorn Sundquist] made a kauf [sic] gesture saying
*kauf*Xbox360*kauf*." (Emphasis added.)
Since John Milius' Nietsche-tinged Conan classic (starring the Governor of California) is probably my favorite movie of all time (I've seen it a hundred times—please don't mention the disgraceful sequel), I'm tempted to pray to Crom that this works out. Fortunately for purists and people who hate Ahnuld, Age of Conan is based not on the movie, but on the gritty, politically incorrect world created in the orginal pulp novels. And it's been gathering positive barbarian buzz for some time.
Gamespot tags the story as "bogus" because, as of right now, Age of Conan is still officially a PC product. But the lack of a publisher as the May PC release date nears means that Microsoft could step in with head-chopping Hyborian ease. We need an MMORPG on the 360 that doesn't have Final Fantasy in the title. Come on Microsoft—let us push the Wheel of Pain.
