The 10 worst in-game quotes

by Blake Snow on Apr 19th 2006 3:00AM

IGN has compiled their pickings for the 10 worst in-game quotes of all-time. If you don't already know the winner, this just might be your first time on the internet.com. I kid, I kid. Here's the list:

"All your base are belong to us." - Zero Wing
"I am Error." - Zelda II: The Adventures of Link
"Jill, why don't you, the master of unlocking, take this lock pick." - Resident Evil
"You were doomed as soon as you lost the ability to love." - Castlevania: Symphony of the Night
"Yo gangsta! Get ready to gang bang!" - Bust-a-Groove
"I feel asleep." - Metal Gear
"You can't give it up! Triumph or die!" - Street Fighter Alpha 3
The DK Rap - Donkey Kong 64, Super Smash Bros Melee
"A Winner is You!" - Pro Wrestling
"Shine Get!" - Super Mario Sunshine

See also: Do you know where I can find some sailors?

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Reader Comments (62)

Didn't we just have this same topic like 2 days ago?

http://www.joystiq.com/2006/04/16/do-you-know-where-i-can-find-some-sailors/#comments

Yup.

I loved Bust-a-Groove but I dont' remember it telling me to gang bang.

Also, what about "This guy are sick" from FFVII?

Not quite the same, TeaTom. That was for the most memorable quotes (and from the Armchair Empire), while this is the Top 10 worst quotes (and from IGN).

And I disagree with the list... Numbers 1, 2, 6, and 8 are priceless.
And #10 is only for the Japanese version of Mario Sunshine, so it's an invalid choice. In fact, it's pretty common in Japanese games to use the phrase "[noun] get!" Why? I don't know why... It just is.

Uh... So, basically, they just took the top 10 most quoted in jest quotes, and added them to a list? Hey, that's real nice, IGN. Though, maybe they should think about putting their staff members through college so they can write coherent and decent reviews.

Also, no mentioning of "You were almost a Jill sandwich!"? That ain't right...

Wasn't "a winnder is you" from samurai showdown?

why is the zelda II quote used? the guys name was error, hence, "I am Error." am i the only person who played the game?
Cheers!

"a winner is you" is from Pro Wrestling on the NES.
Also- i havent played it in a long time, but i swear "shine get!" is on my copy of SMS.

Cheers!

"You spoony bard!"
- Final Fantasy IV (or II)

A piss-poor translation so timeless, it has been *included* in all the recent remakes. How this didn't make it onto IGN's list boggles the mind.

Actually I believe the whole quote for street fighter should end with...

"You can't give it up! Triumph or die!"

"GO FOR BROKE!"

:D

Uhhh LX, what part of "You spoony bard" reflects a poor translation...?

I'm not sure what's wrong with the Symphony of the Night quote. Heck, even the other one on IGN's page ("Mankind ill needs a savior such as you!") is correct Shakespearean English...

How 'bout from Captian America and the Avengers:
Stage 1 Boss: You can't escape!
Captain America: You will be the one escaping!

What the hell kind of list is this? Why is �You're Winner� from Big Rigs (1/10 on GameSpot) not on there?!

http://www.gamespot.com/pages/image_viewer/frame_lead.php?pid=919220&img=1&sid=undefined

No really, the worse quote has to be from Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time

Navi - "Hey, Listen!"

I just started playing it again 2 days ago and realised that the game hates you. Why else would there be so much dialog/monolog and narative you simply can NOT skip through. I felt like I was playing "A Book! - The game"

what about soul caliber two?

"I've had enough of you!"
"Haven't you had enough?"

#11, Hans: I'm not sure what it's supposed to have been, but "spoony bard" is apparently an incorrect translation.

In IGN's review the guy actually seemed annoyed that despite all of the retranslated dialogue they left it in, I'd be pretty upset personally if they didn't. I recently played through IV advance and it rocked, new translation really made a difference, but that line was a huge part of the nostalgia for me. And one reason it's not on this list, is that despite the bad translation it may be one of the single greatest in-game quotes.

Anyone know what the true translation is supposed to be?

Kye, you seen the VGCats comic?
http://www.vgcats.com/comics/?strip_id=42

Brilliant, it's a webitem on my desktop...

what about Guile in SF2,talking to Chun Li
"Go home and be a family man"

one of the advertisements around the city in Streets of Rage 2
"It's like boo!"

Super ghouls'n'ghosts
"take a key for coming in!"

Samurai Showdown

"VICTOLY!" - the most cringe-worthy quote i have ever seen

Yeah Ive seen that Lee. Had it as my walpaper for a quite while.

There's another one somewhere where Link gets someone to assassinate (fly swat) Navi. I could've sworn it was a VG Cats comic but I can't find it on their archive. :(

please....let us not forget.... x-men arcade 4 player game. Youre in the savage land on a cliff when suddenly you are confonted by magneto. And he says... not just in text but in voiceover.... " WELCOME TO DIE!!!!!!" .. now that... is good shit.

damn, someone beat me to it

http://www.cs.utk.edu/~elston/images/victoly2.jpg

How about Sonic Adventure 2, during the Tails and Robotnik battles?

Tails: I'll beat you!
Robotnik: Do you think you can beat me?

How about in any ddr game?

Announcer: It's a new rekkid!
Gosh, that was annoying....

I actually have the PS1 remake of Final Fantasy IV in Japanese, so I could replay up to the bombing of Damcyan and then translate the actual dialogue. To the best of my recollection, Tellah mostly just curses at Edward and tells him to shut up. Any translation along the lines of, "You bastard!", "Shut your cake hole!", "Die you miserable worm!" is appropriate, really.

Oh, hey, Street Fighter Alpha 3 pre-fight quotes - any of those are classic. "It all depends on your skill - face it straight!" Oh, how many times my friends and I quoted those in college...

Or what about this post-song quote from DDR: "I can't stop crying buckets of tears!" For some reason, that was one of the quotes for a better song clear.

There should be at least one quote from Mike Tyson's Punch Out! in there

One game I forgot about, which is because the first thing everyone does when they play it is turn off the annoucer, was Burnout 3. "This is your buddy Stryker..." and then he says some horrible quote which could easily end with "to the X-treme" and not lose anything.

The sad part is that that guy is a real, actual DJ.

My personal cringeworthy quote is:

"Do you think love can bloom - even on a battlefield?"

What a ridiculous piece of nonsense - and then Snake, trying to sound like Snake Plissken, says "Yes. I believe love can bloom anytime, anywhere." So utterly silly and nonsensical. Maybe in Katamari that would make sense, but Metal Gear Solid?

Warning: nerd rant follows.

Actually, "You spoony bard" is correct English, because spoony is a real adjective. The reason you've never heard it is because it's very old. No, really. The last time one of the definitions for spoony was used in print was in the late 1800's according to the OED.
spoony, a.
1. foolish, silly
2. sentimentally/foolishly amorous

So in reality, he was just saying "You stupid bard." As mentioned above, the original Japanese was cursing, so this was one of the many censored lines.

With the rant out of the way, I was going to mention that my favorite bizarre localization was the random yelling of "BARF!" by fallen enemies on River City Ransom, but after some research, I found out that that was ADDED, not translated. I don't know if that makes it more or less strange.

I could go on forever about the strange choices made when localizing games, but I've taken up enough space already.

My favorite has always been the screen you get when you beat Bugs Bunny's Crazy Castle for the Game Boy. It's just this message, on a blank background:

Congraturations!
You are good player!

take any of the cheeserific dialogue from Max Payne, and you got some content. Or if any of you play Dead or Alive, you know the characters say the most off the wall crap at the beginning and end of each match.

Hell it doesn't even have to be games, I've read some online manuals from ASUS that had apparently been written by koreans with bad engrish.

I never miss an opportunity to listen to that rap. Shame on you, IGN :(

Numero 23: "How about in any ddr game?"

You were never (un)fortunate enough to play the old ones? (Guessing a bit here from memory)

"Your dancing is like sunshine on a cloudy day!"

"I can see hope in your dance, I can see tommorow in your dance"

But if you run low on health:

"Did you have breakfast today?" :(

A classic from Fatal Fury 3:

"Nice timing! I've got an ungodly buildup of hormones and got to get rid of them!"

No one mentioned Bad Dudes?! Come on!

#19 and #22. I'm still laughing at that "VICTOLY." Reading a lot of these comments, I'm surprised that the game makers didn't ask someone fluent in both English and Japanese to proof read the text in the game instead of just using a Japanese-English dictionary to replace the words.

ok, what a crappy list. They could have done soooo much better with that.
For one thing, the DK rap is terrible, but in an endearing and amusing way. I highly doubt it is meant to be a beautiful musical opus.
Also, the dialogue in SOTN is sometimes cheesey, yes, but so many people love it and there arent really any embarassing mistakes in grammar in the dialogue. The voice acting is questionable but there are many games with worse voice acting.
Weak list, IGN. Weak list.

from lufia and the fortress of doom

"I cant stand all this sand.I wish I had some fireworks."

Zero Wing is deeply ingrained into our brains and pop culture, but "a winner is you" is truly classic. Pro Wrestling for the NES was the bomb.

Lupin the third,veeery old game

"push only 1 players button"

I have to agree with Ryan Williams (#14)
I can't believe that the Big Rigs "YOU'RE WINNER" quote isn't in here...

It got a 1/10 for goodness sakes! They even wanted to give it a lower score...

Check out the vid: http://www.gamespot.com/pc/driving/bigrigsotrr/media.html
(Last one, Video Review)

Man...

Ninja Gaiden,glorious game

"Getting fight to the point..."

now,was that a pun or a spelling mistake?

Ninja Gaiden,AGAIN

"Ryu:There's no doubt about it.If only I'm not too late..."

Chapter 1:Escape in a Forest Ninjya Gaiden

Am I the only one who likes the DK Rap? :(

Heh, Big Rigs. I remember when we rewrote Netjak's code just so we could give it a lower score than a 1.0/10. Good times.

SNK could get their own category for bad translations... One of the best ones I saw was on the kiosk demo they did for Xbox Metal Slug 3...

"Press SATRT to begin"

Yes, they misspelled start.

#35:
Pro Wrestling may be the bomb, but did it ever set you up the bomb?

"Don't you know that blackmail is waay uncool?"
-Ryo Hazuki... at two MUGGERS!

"This is the end of my cursed journey..."
-Ivy upon winning arcade mode

"Justice will prevail...just kidding!"(what? it won't?)
-Xianghua on her desire to do good...just kidding!

"I'm Ant-tastic!"
-The Ant

"I hate that Eggman!"
-Sonic reversing a cartoon quote

"Cyclopse isn't the only summers with power!"
-Havok before each fight in X-Men ND

"You arn't from the future or something lame like that?"
-Spiderman(2002)on murderous robots

"It wasn't me! It was some other cop who doesn't play by the rules..."
-Nick Kang on some destruction he caused

Two Words

LLLEEERRROOOOOYYY JJJEEENNNNKKKIIINNNNSS

What? No "You fail it! Your skill is not enough"?

Did IGN not play Sonic Heroes ever? Gosh, they can come out with a top 10 of that game only! The DK Rap isn't even a quote! (And I do think its funny) And Shine Get! is only for the japanese version of Mario Sunshine.

Oh, almost forgot a classic that most people didn't see (because the game sold poorly). From the Game Boy Color Lufia game:

Gades: Now you will experience frue terror!

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The 10 worst in-game quotes

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