Nintendo today announced the new name of their next-generation console, previously codenamed "Revolution." The new name is "Wii," pronounced like the word "wee."

We've copied Nintendo's hype-filled prose explaining the name-change below, in italics:

"Introducing ... Wii. As in "we." While the code-name "Revolution" expressed our direction, Wii represents the answer. Wii will break down that wall that separates video game players from everybody else. Wii will put people more in touch with their games ... and each other. But you're probably asking: What does the name mean?"

"Wii sounds like 'we,' which emphasizes this console is for everyone. Wii can easily be remembered by people around the world, no matter what language they speak. No confusion. No need to abbreviate. Just Wii."

"Wii has a distinctive "ii" spelling that symbolizes both the unique controllers and the image of people gathering to play. And Wii, as a name and a console, brings something revolutionary to the world of video games that sets it apart from the crowd."

"So that's Wii. But now Nintendo needs you. Because, it's really not about you or me. It's about Wii. And together, Wii will change everything."

• I need a Wii now! I can't wait until this fall!
• "Mum, I finished my homework. Can I play with my Wii some more?"
• "Hey Mom, Roger's bringing his Wii over. We're going to connect his Wii to my Wii and then we'll play all night."
  
• "We are the Knights who say Wii!"
• Wii Willy Winky runs through town, upstairs and downstairs in his nightgown. Knocking on the window, crying through the lock "Are the children all in bed? It’s past eight o’clock."
• "Pass me that wemote contwol pwease?" -- Elmer Fudd redux
• "Do you have any Wii in stock?" asked the customer. "Or course we do," exclaimed the clerk, "Urine GameStop!"
• When you're a kid and you wanna go "whee" but you ain't got drugs yet. [NSFW, but funny as all heck.]

Just remember, folks, nobody liked the controller when it was first unveiled either. This new name will seem as nifty, familiar and as comfortable as that silly controller once it's all said and done.

Remember, too, that you're not the audience for this console. The hardcore market is only a subsegment of the entire population of people who Nintendo hopes will become gamers, if approached in the right way with the right product.

[Update 1: added link to official announcement.]

[Update 2: added official explanation of the name]

[Update 3: added commentary]

[Update 4: Just had to get that Elmer Fudd comment in there. Nice one, Adrian.]

[Update 5: Fixed mis-attributed quote. Added another immature funny.]

[Update 6: Added the classic Gonads and Strife flash movie.]