Internet casino sponsoring "Raging Boll" event

by Ludwig Kietzmann { Aug 23rd 2006 at 9:00PM }

Widely known for his anti-masterpieces, House of the Dead, Bloodrayne and Alone in the Dark, German film director Uwe Boll drew plenty of internet ire in June by sending out a public challenge to his (many, many) detractors. Like any civilized and intelligent human being, Boll decided that the best way to deal with those that disagreed with his artistic vision for videogame adaptations was to punch them in the face, grr! The invitation urged haters to fly to Vancouver and meet the German in the boxing ring for a one-on-one session of metaphorically rich pummeling. Internet casino Goldenpalace.com has issued a press release stating that they will be the ones to sponsor the event, now dubbed "Raging Boll."

Naturally, the prestige gained from having your event backed by an internet casino cannot be overstated. The joint's CEO, Richard Rowe, notes that Boll's attention grab is refreshingly ridiculous. "We receive so many outlandish offers for advertising exposure that it is refreshing to see something that surprises even us. That is why we decided to get involved. This has gotten so much attention so far, and we can't wait to see how it will turn out." Before starting proper on 23 September, Uwe will stop off in Spain to battle Carlos Palencia Jimenez-Arguello, a critic who has already vowed to Kill Boll (challenge video embedded in the latter section of the post). After that bout, Boll will face Something Awful's Richard "Lowtax" Kyanka, Jeff Sneider from Ain't It Cool News, Chris Alexander of Rue Morgue and Nelson Chance Minter from Website Critic.

All the fights will be filmed for inclusion in Boll's Postal film, no doubt rendered vaguely entertaining by showing his face deteriorating over the course of the event. It may even prove to be beneficial to his career -- a few brutal blows to the head might be just the thing to bring him to his senses. Perhaps then he'll realize how difficult it is to hold on to credibility when you've got boxing gloves on your hands.

[Via GameSetWatch]

Tags: Alone in the Dark, AloneInTheDark, Bloodrayne, Boxing, Dungeon Siege, DungeonSiege, Ed Wood, EdWood, House of the Dead, HouseOfTheDead, Punch-Out, Uwe Boll, UweBoll

Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)

Twisted Imp @ Aug 23rd 2006 9:14PM

Him boxing will be in his Postal movie.

The Origin of Species @ Aug 23rd 2006 9:47PM

He's brilliant, just not in the movies sense.

It's quite a feat to churn out such Boll-shit (sorry) yet still get as much press as he does.

fable2323 @ Aug 23rd 2006 9:50PM

I dont think people realize this but this guy is a boxer. He used to box when he was younger. I think these guys may be in for a hurting. Not sure if this is the case but have any of you actually looked at what some of the press guys look like. Fat, pudgy, out of shape and they have no boxing experience. Boll may make crappy films but he is gonna kick some of these guys if not all of their asses....

ViciousVariable @ Aug 23rd 2006 9:57PM

I'm going to compliment Uwe Boll here:

He's a terrible film maker.
He couldn't write a film to save his life.
But his skills at PRODUCING films are amazing.

Basically, by sacrificing his body (and potentially his pride) he's allowed himself to make a scene for his movie for ridiculously cheap. Doesn't pay his actors (watching him get beaten within an inch of his life would be MORE than enough), and most of the other costs (outside of crew and stock) are probably going to be absorbed by Golden Palace. On top of that, it's a kind of 'how absolutely novel' type of publicity.

The reason why he continues to make these horrible exploitation flicks is because of his skills in production. He knows what he needs to make flicks that will make /just/ enough money internationally (they bomb domestically, but are popular somehow in other countries...) to keep him afloat. He can keep churning 'em out, then, as long as he's making enough profit internationally to keep himself in the black. Hell, if they don't fix that german film taxbreak... He doesn't even have to recoup the money for most of his investors!

So, in (rambling) short: he's an idiot savant when it comes to film: couldn't make an artistic film to save his life... but goddamn does he understand the business side of film.

Tom @ Aug 23rd 2006 9:57PM

I agree with fable2323, theres also a fair chance that Boll has been training pretty hard for this. I would like to see some pictures of the guys he is fighting. I can only imagine the guys from aint it cool and something awful looking like comic book guy from the simpsons.

idioteraser @ Aug 23rd 2006 10:07PM

Great goldenpalace does another thing for publicity. Guess buying crappy food that look like they have crappy images of Jesus to the gullible was getting old for them.

Hannah @ Aug 23rd 2006 10:42PM

Maybe I'm just weird, but I actually like Uwe Boll.

Whatever you might think of his movies, you gotta admit that he's a really cool guy. I met him last month after reading about him on the internet, and even though I hadn't seen any of his movies and didn't even claim to be a fan, he was really nice to me. I found that he was very approachable too and he was quite happy to talk about his work and answer any questions that I had.

He's actually going to be filming the Vancouver fights in a location that's extremely easy for me to get to, so hopefully I'll be able to watch in person. Should be quite a show...

gamer9190 @ Aug 23rd 2006 10:58PM

So... Let me get this straight? Lowtax... and Uwe Boll... are going to box?

This had better show up on the internet pretty quickly after the actual event.

BPM? @ Aug 24th 2006 12:03AM

I don't think his challengers will have much of a chance (gaming nerds versus someone who actually has boxed in his life), but I wish them the best of luck.

And, heck, I'd probably fight him, too, if given the chance (even though I know I'd probably lose).

Will @ Aug 24th 2006 12:05AM

Thank god those rumors of Uwe Boll directing the Metal Gear Solid movie turned out to be false.

Go Lowtax.

Alkaiser @ Aug 24th 2006 12:25AM

That guy in the video is toast. I'm betting Uwe knocks him out with one punch.

What I'm guessing most of the guys in here don't realize is that while they've never taken a punch, Uwe has, when they come out and throw some sissy jab like that guy in the video, Boll's going to go right through it and plant an uppercut in their undefended faces.

It's too bad he didn't actually make any games, or I'd recommend our own Caley "Ridiculous Foilist" Anderson, to take him on, seeing as he is also an ex-boxer.

I think the majority of them won't even get in one good shot, (unless Boll's being a good sport about it) with the exception of Lowtax, who I'm pretty sure is training right now to weather some punches, and will absorb one hit from Boll, and then go for the groin, a la Jim Carrey from Dumb & Dumber.

This is pretty much going to be a sadder version of "Average Joe".

jGURKA @ Aug 24th 2006 1:33AM

Uwe Boll's movies are the biggest pieces of shit I've ever seen. Anyone else think that if he gets his ass kicked he's not going to put it in the movie? He may be right challenging critics that would most likely have NO boxing/fighting in their background, but who's not to say they aren't training right now just for this?

Pat @ Aug 24th 2006 2:16AM

Man, these fights are going to be funny.

Zero_ @ Aug 24th 2006 2:18AM

Uwe Boll's movie may look like complete shit, and they are complete shit but he looks like a really great, down to earth guy. I could be wrong, but... watching his interviews etc. he doesn't seem like an ass.

Wilson @ Aug 24th 2006 2:30AM

So eiter Lowtax or Boll gets their asses handed to them... It's a Win-Win situation :D

Now, if we could get Harry Knowles into this, that would be awesome...

Ross @ Aug 24th 2006 6:49AM

Why can't Jack Thompson be more like Uwe Boll? Uwe Boll knows people hates him and he finds it funny and humorous. Rather than make himself look like a dumbass he actually goes along and uses this to his advantage.

Although, in all respect, I hope Uwe Boll whoops all those guys asses. Just for the sake of humor. I wonder what Lowtax would say after he got his ass kicked by Uwe Boll. GO BOLL!

Jimbobsen @ Aug 24th 2006 7:19AM

Boll is not only clever (he earned a PHD in film/literature), he's also a really nice, down-to-earth guy - with no talents in moviemaking whatsoever. What would you do, if you had the opportunity to make one movie after another? that's right: make them. So let's just leave him in peace.

KR @ Aug 24th 2006 8:59AM

So I guess I either missed it or they haven't announced it yet - is this going to be legit or just "for the movie" and fake?

If it's real, what sucks is you get people like the Something Awful guy and the AICN guy, who likely couldn't fight their way out of an enclosure made of wet toilet paper. They get chosen because they have popular sites.

Regular people like me who can't stand him, are vocal about it, but would actually stand a good chance to kick his ass have no chance in getting picked.

Sadly, Boll is smarter than his critics in this case.