PS3 will win the console war, so say the stars
If a two-bit analyst can offer up a noteworthy prediction for the latest console war so can an astrologer. That's right, Dutch astrologer Elizabeth Hathway has looked to the stars to determine the fates of Sony, Nintendo, and Microsoft's latest ventures.As it turns out, the stars are aligning most favorably for Sony, even if the Venus-Uranus hook-up, happening in Gemini, seems a bit suspicious -- a sign of innovation, really? Guess the universe is pulling for Blu-ray.
While Microsoft's horoscope ain't too shabby either -- it's all about Jupiter's entry into Sagittarius -- Nintendo is apparently in need of an astrological miracle. The problem stems from Wii being tied to Scorpio. Scorpio is a fixed sign, but the Wii's strong suit is active gaming ... Uh-oh, don't look now, but Nintendo's progressed Sun has aligned square with its radix Saturn. Hard times ahead!
Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)
Mr. Khan @ Jan 3rd 2007 6:30PM
1st off, you say starts instead of stars
2nd... ... ... wtf?
BklynKid @ Jan 3rd 2007 6:38PM
Haha
Ignatius @ Jan 3rd 2007 6:41PM
Astrology is one of the crappiest pseudo-sciences ever created. Whoever is an astrologist can burn in hell, cause one of these days, I'm gonna blow up your precious planets.
matthew @ Jan 3rd 2007 6:43PM
"...Nintendo's progressed Sun has aligned square with its radix Saturn"
There you have it. Nights 2 on Wii CONFIRMED.
Roddie @ Jan 3rd 2007 6:53PM
What a load of bullshit; please stop with the prediction updates, they are a waste of time.
Triforceowner @ Jan 3rd 2007 6:56PM
Sony's new marketing strategy:
Buy are system, the stars have already said you will!
Matt @ Jan 3rd 2007 7:01PM
Sony really should stop wasting money on these analysts...
syco @ Jan 3rd 2007 7:04PM
... I laughed.
C'mon, it's funny.
Barb @ Jan 3rd 2007 7:08PM
Cem sorry maar ik ga dit niet eens lezen.
Gelukkig voor jou was dit een copy/paste werkje.
Earl @ Jan 3rd 2007 7:16PM
This makes a lot of sense! She must've been advising Sony for years. Why else would they think people want a $600 game machine?
AssemblyLineHuman @ Jan 3rd 2007 7:17PM
If only stars played video games...
Voodoo Salami @ Jan 3rd 2007 7:18PM
The PS3 will definately dominate 'cause Tom Cruise says that it's the preferred console of Scientologists.
StMadnes @ Jan 3rd 2007 7:40PM
well I spoke to Ms.Cleo and she predicts that the 360 is gonna trail behind the other consoles in sales this year- and it's not because she's psychic either.
DiahrreaMan @ Jan 3rd 2007 7:42PM
Does this mean pigs will fly?
thejakeman @ Jan 3rd 2007 8:02PM
OMG LEIK TOTALLY BURN THE FREAKIN START TEH WII OWNS JOO!!!! STOOPID ASTORLORGICALS ! WII IS TEH BEST LIEK YAGH!!!!!
ravensdolphin @ Jan 3rd 2007 8:35PM
sorry to inject harry potter things in this the stars do lie. sintares said that
David004 @ Jan 3rd 2007 8:36PM
BUT THE SUN TOLD ME THAT THE 360 WOULD WIN AND THE MOON THEN SAID THE SUN WAS A LAIR AND THAT THE WII WAS GOING TO WIN!
And I love how the Sony fanboys eat this shit up.
Blazur @ Jan 3rd 2007 8:52PM
Is this another brilliant marketing ploy dreamed up by the folks who put together alliwantforxmasisapsp.com?!? Otherwise, I'd say the stars are full of crap.
falth @ Jan 3rd 2007 9:40PM
Worst. News. Ever.
serge @ Jan 3rd 2007 9:59PM
Gaming websites should ban any news from sony PS3, till they learn, consumers are not their fools.
Damn these people at Sony keep shitting on the poor gamer.
Its nice how sony attempts to feed their fans with more nonsense crap.
Sadly there are only 2 gaming consoles on the market, 360 and wii, ps3 is not even a game machine as was said. ps3 was made to help cure cancer in expense of ps3 fanboys, so when ur ps3 is idle it can calculate stuff for medical institutes. :D Gaming is the last thing it can offer after movie playing machine and internet browsing on ur plasma tv.
Can sony do anything right?
Well maybe, but i dont think so.
DEAD BRAND, be the stars with you!
Megatron @ Jan 3rd 2007 10:38PM
I'd rather have actual FACTS..
Justin @ Jan 3rd 2007 10:49PM
#4:
Godammit, I lol'd. =D
JBDragon @ Jan 3rd 2007 10:51PM
Sony must be Really Desperate to find someone/anyone that says the PS3 will win the Console war and by such a huge win, even though the Price is just crazy. Nice try SONY this one isn't going to work either.
Dave @ Jan 4th 2007 12:17AM
Funny.
Sly @ Jan 4th 2007 12:39AM
Pat Robertson was told by a greater power that the Xbox 360 will win and save the world.
32_Footsteps @ Jan 4th 2007 12:49AM
Okay, know how you can tell that this astrologer, at the very least, can't be trusted to analyze video gaming? Based on her star charts, she says the Playstation consoles are very tough to break.
Maybe if you lack the upper body strength of the average five-year old. But beyond that, they're incredibly fragile, easily the most fragile consoles I've ever owned.
Though if I'm to understand the pseudoscience behind this all correctly, based on my birthdate, I'm supposed to get the Wii as my console of choice. And who am I to argue with pseudoscience, particularly as practiced by someone who thinks Playstation consoles are durable?
Tom @ Jan 4th 2007 2:20AM
Guess?, That aint no guess, thats what its gonna be! - Vicki Vallencourt (Fairuza Balk) from Waterboy.
CrimemasterGogo @ Jan 4th 2007 3:31AM
Astrology is probably the second most useless thing on earth next to the playstation brand!! And yes ive already counted David hasslehoff and Angelina Jolies uterus.
Ken Kutaragi @ Jan 4th 2007 6:21AM
Ask her where Hoffa is please!!!!
White Rose Duelist @ Jan 4th 2007 10:05AM
I think someone forgot to take Rupert into account when making their charts.
whosmav @ Jan 4th 2007 10:51AM
Its the prediction-bandwagon! Everybody's jumping on! Lets go! Common sense not required!
Mal F4cti0n @ Jan 4th 2007 11:34AM
I think you meant OUR, number 6 (Triforceowner).
"Buy are system"...no,no,no Buy OUR system.
Number 17 (David004), how are the sony fanbois eating this up? I think, nay, I hope, they are smart enough not to take this as another sign of their console trumping the others. I don't see any fanbois posting yet.
fightinfilipino @ Jan 4th 2007 12:20PM
i'm surprised Shagi hasn't weighed in on this concrete evidence of Sony superiority. i would think he'd be all over this like white on rice.
M Boisv @ Jan 4th 2007 5:59PM
wtf?
ackmondual @ Jan 4th 2007 6:11PM
Horoscopes? Really!? I thought this was something the newspapers and media made up just to sell more copies of their paper and to get more audience respectively.
kse3 @ Jan 5th 2007 1:36AM
This astrologer clearly forgot that Sony is also represented by the constellation Cancer (the crab), which is due to be attacked at its weak point for massive damage soon.
Luke @ Jan 5th 2007 11:06PM
This is stupid, there's no way an astrologer can tell me that my wii is gonna fail on games and loose the console war. I was dissapionted because of my GameCube's third party support and I hope Nintendo doesen't dissapiont me again.
New 360 Owner @ Jan 10th 2007 9:11PM
I suppose next we get a story how to use alchemy to turn your PS2 into a PS3 so you don't have to pay $600 for one.
Luke @ Jan 16th 2007 3:59PM
Uh... This is a very incorrect prediction.
I work at an EB Games in Easton, PA, and lemme tell you, no one wants PS3s. We have like 8 of em just sitting in the back. Everyone wants a Wii. We can't keep those in the store for more than 5 minutes when shipments come in.
This is how the dialogue generally goes:
"Got any Wiis in stock?"
"Nope, sorry."
"Got any Playstation 3s?"
"Yeah, we sure do. You want me to get one for you?"
"No. I was just wondering if you had any."
Here's the bottom line. No one wants to drop $600 on a game console that has one good launch title and a 1/3 defective rate. Our demo unit in the store was broken from normal use the day we set it up.
Sony loses.