Paperboy wrecking the XBLA neighborhood this Wednesday

It's hard to say whether Paperboy is simply an effervescent arcade game or a frighteningly accurate simulation of life in the suburbs (see: video after the break). You'll be able to judge for yourself this coming Wednesday at 9AM GMT (1AM PST) when the intricate study in aggressive news distribution lands neatly on the Xbox Live Arcade doorstep. When you retrieve it while still in your stained bathrobe and your morning daze, keep in mind that the graphically enhanced download will set you back 400 MS Points ($5).
Oh, and remember to duck. Those newspapers will take your head clean off.











Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)
Jake @ Feb 12th 2007 5:08PM
Dear MS,
I, like many, enjoyed Paperboy in its time and wouldn't mind playing it again. However, $5 is just too much. If these retro games were $2, I would own 20 of them. Instead, I only own SFII, and regret it. I do like the demos and all, but if you want to get more of my money, reduce the price a bit.
With Love,
Jake
Draco @ Feb 12th 2007 5:09PM
thats hilarious
Karttikeya @ Feb 12th 2007 5:19PM
http://www.xbox.com/en-US/games/p/paperboyxboxlivearcade/default.htm
You get the original game. Plus Live Aware, achievements, leaderboards, and Multiplayer (Versus & Co-op, Splitscreen & Online).
Then you got the whole Xbox Live interaction on top of that.
So. Just. Shut. Up. And. Stop. Trying. To. Find. A. Reason. To. Bitch. It's better than paying $5 for "Golf/Generic Sport".
SergeXIII @ Feb 12th 2007 5:21PM
Oh hey, now my comic is kinda prudent sorta...
http://gnerds.comicgenesis.com
Leggo @ Feb 12th 2007 5:21PM
can we stop with the retro garbage? If I wanted to play these, I'd get a collection at a fraction of the cost. Where are all the indie-developed games? Shit, I'd be happy if you just put out some more board games and card games.
Video Scrabble? Trivial Pursuit? HOW HARD IS THAT?
Instead we're stuck with goddamn rootbeer tapper, frogger, and now paperboy.
How is it that MS has had a YEAR headstart and is already being dwarfed by Wii and their genuine classics (not museum pieces like Joust), and Sony and their releasing of Tekken 5 HD?
Pathetic. Someone making decisions needs to get fired. Beyond Uno, Geometry Wars, and Marble Blast, there isn't a damn thing worth getting on XBLA anymore.
Karttikeya @ Feb 12th 2007 5:21PM
By the way, hilarious video.
Karttikeya @ Feb 12th 2007 5:26PM
You forgot Cloning Clyde, Outpost Kaloki X, Small Arms, Heavy Weapon, RoboBlitz, Assault Heroes, Novadrome, Mutant Storm Reloaded, Gauntlet and Wik: Fable of Souls.
Then there are the free games like Hexic HD and TotemBall. At least you get trial versions of the games if you need a quick fix for games like Pac-Man.
Neccy @ Feb 13th 2007 6:14AM
I'm glad i'm not the only one who think XBLA is being drowned in crappy retro games.
I like a retro game as much as the next one, but if i'm going retro I want to know it still has that replayabilty that appeals to me still.
Frogger, Paperboy, Pacman etc have been around ALL THE TIME, thier the type of arcade games that I for one really dont miss, hell there's flash versions everywhere on the net.
This crap feels just like XBLA filler inbetween good releases such as Worms.
polly @ Feb 12th 2007 5:31PM
Dear MS,
Where the frak is Worms?
With contempt,
polly
jay @ Feb 12th 2007 5:38PM
Wow. Paperboy wasn't that good back then. I had it for my Spectrum ZX81 and laughed at the crapness of it back then.
Oh and extras? You can't polish shit.
I'll skip.
p-diddy @ Feb 12th 2007 5:57PM
>> How is it that MS has had a YEAR headstart and
>> is already being dwarfed by Wii and their
>> genuine classics (not museum pieces like
>> Joust), and Sony and their releasing of
>> Tekken 5 HD?
Ummm, because Nintendo and Sony already have licenses to the stuff they are releasing? I mean, MS could theoretically release MS Flight Simulator 2000, or Halo, but NinSony have a head start because they are just re-releasing _their_own_ games.
-p-
Diskoboy @ Feb 12th 2007 5:40PM
If I had a Spectrum, I would laugh at it too.
Diskoboy @ Feb 12th 2007 5:45PM
Oh - I'm so glad I'm an adult and have a real job where a measly $5 doesn't mean shit to me.
[sarcasm]WAHHHHH!!! It's $5 and an old game! Boo hoo! I'm a poor 13 year old![/sarcasm]
And you people really call yourselves gamers? Sorry. Not a chance. Get the fuck over it.
Prokaryote @ Feb 12th 2007 5:48PM
Already have Paperboy for my Game Gear, do I really need it again? It's a fine game, but five bucks?
Henry Gale @ Feb 12th 2007 5:59PM
I'm sorry. But $5 is a great price for a retro game with new multiplayer and leaderboards.
If you get a retro collection disk, you get no LIVE features.
I guess Nintendo charging more for games from years ago with no added features is OK. I would love to get a VC game, but I can play those on my PC with an emulator. Now if Nintendo brought out Mario Kart with online play I would be all over it. But, I would bet that would be more then 5 bucks. Sure, I could also play paperboy or frogger or tapper on MAME. But I bought those games just for the fact I can compare my scores and play multiplayer over LIVE.
If you don't want it, don't buy it.
polly @ Feb 12th 2007 6:03PM
@11,
Geez dude, glad you have the financial freedom to drop coin on overpriced 20 year old games. You rock dude. I think most of us are pissed at 2 weeks of no new releases and then they follow up the next couple weeks with two shitty retro "classics" instead of giving everyone something they actually want (ie Worms, Catan, SotN, Alien Hominid). The past month of XBLA has been a joke.
carg0 @ Feb 12th 2007 6:05PM
...and as usual it is met with the same indifference shared by virtually every other release before it.
huzzah.
Farseer @ Feb 12th 2007 6:09PM
Wow, I'm sorry, but $5.00 is literally nothing anymore. If you bitch about paying too much a game at $5.00, then I'm willing to go out on a limb and guess you're the kind of person who stiffs their waiter or waitress because all they did was "serve me food". If you don't want the game, don't freaking buy it. If you don't want to tip, then go to McDonald's. Sorry, but I served tables to pay for college, and tightwads piss me off.
p-diddy @ Feb 12th 2007 6:13PM
>> You rock dude. I think most of us are pissed
>> at 2 weeks of no new releases and then they
>> follow up the next couple weeks with two
>> shitty retro "classics" instead of giving
>> everyone something they actually want (ie
>> Worms, Catan, SotN, Alien Hominid).
Oh noes!!!!111oneoneone1!1! I can't teh pl4y teh gameX0rs I alreadys gots. No n3w XBLA gamX0rs makes my life teh lameness. :-(
XBLA came out with a game you didn't like. If your life doesn't go on, I think you need to rethink your priorities. XBLA hasn't come out with a game in months that you like. waaaahhhhhh. Pop in a disc you haven't completed all the achievements on and have at it. That's what achievements are there for.
-p-
Farseer @ Feb 12th 2007 6:13PM
BTW, I won't be buying Paperboy, not because it costs $5.00 - I wouldn't buy it if it cost $2.00. I just don't want it. Polly (#15) has it right - where the hell are Worms, SotN, and AH? The Arcade needs a boost...
Mr Khan @ Feb 12th 2007 6:29PM
It seems like nothing can please everyone
(I would buy this, hell, i just bought LESS of a game, Ice Climber, for the same price on VC today, although Ice Climber is more fun than hell)
i could tell how small the game was because it was done downloading in seconds, literally, and Shop Channel runs slow usually
crab battle @ Feb 12th 2007 6:33PM
Note to Microsoft: leave the classics to Nintendo, give Xbox users new content. Seriously, you can pay $5 for Paper boy or $5 for the original Mario Bros. or the original Zelda. Really tough call there.
Hellsing @ Feb 13th 2007 8:42PM
XD MEGA64 rocks!!! Oh and Paperboy was fun in the arcades but not $5 worth of fun.
Hellsing @ Feb 12th 2007 6:47PM
XD Mega64 rocks!!!! Oh and Paperboy was fun not the arcades but not $5 worth of fun.
David @ Feb 12th 2007 7:04PM
http://www.ebgames.com/product.asp?product%5Fid=950453
Problem solved. You can get it for 50 cents.
I thought the Nintendo VC games were a ripoff until you figure out the pricing for the MS MP.
David @ Feb 12th 2007 7:07PM
And Farseer, you didn't get tips because so many people were cheap. You didn't get any because you are such a bitch. If you are good I give a 20-25% tip, if you suck / have an atitude I leave no more than 10%.
Karttikeya @ Feb 12th 2007 7:17PM
David, shut up. No need for the name calling.
And does Paperboy for the Midway Arcade Treasures compilation have leaderboards, achievements, co-op, multiplayer, online & offline, Live Aware?
No.
Compared to MOST downloadable games for $5. It's quite the deal.
Farseer @ Feb 12th 2007 7:58PM
LOL @ David (post #24),
Did I hit a nerve? I commend you for saying you leave %20-25, but I don't think you ever served tables before. Some people stiff you, no matter how well you do, or, even better, they leave %5-10 and then give you a compliment to the manager. That was always my favorite. Those compliments sure helped me buy textbooks. Regardless, if I was "...such a bitch..." I would still be serving tables now instead of sitting at them.
And thanks for showing us how cheaply we could get this $5 game in post #23: "Problem solved. You can get it for 50 cents." Way to show that %20-25 attitude champ.
mike @ Feb 12th 2007 8:00PM
if I wanted retro garbage, I would buy games on my wiis virtual console of crap (which is actualy worse becuase no online or additions).
I want new games (except for worms, cant wait for that). So far I only own 1 XBLA game (marble blast ultra) and I havent played it for a year since I bought it.
Farseer @ Feb 12th 2007 8:07PM
20-25%, not %20-25. Not quite sure what I was thinking... whoops.
David @ Feb 12th 2007 8:34PM
I can give good tips because I don't waste so much money on lame ass games that are fucking 20 years old when I can get 10 games for the price of one. It's a good way to get ahead in life, don't waste your money invest it wisely. "But they have added features!" 90% or maybe %90 of us don't give a rats ass if they add stats and co-op to this game. Do you really need co-op for this game?!
Michael @ Feb 12th 2007 8:41PM
Farseer - What the hell?
I cooked at a restaurant and worked way harder than the f*cking servers. We didn't even have a tip jar for the kitchen staff, and the waitresses would walk away with double our wages in tips. If waiting tables is the hardest thing you've ever done for money, you're pretty freakin' lucky.
...and NOBODY deserves a 20% or whatever cut of a meal for bringing said food from point a to point b.
p-diddy @ Feb 12th 2007 8:41PM
David, I disagree. 90% of us do care. See? I just threw out a number of people I assume are like-minded like you did and suddenly my argument became so much more persuasive.
Oh wait, it didn't.
Please, stop typing. You're just wasting our electrons.
-p-
p-diddy @ Feb 12th 2007 9:03PM
>> ...and NOBODY deserves a 20% or whatever cut
>> of a meal for bringing said food from point
>> a to point b.
Unless they made recommendations to the customer, explained why the cook undercooked the customer's meal, explained why the cook undercooked it AGAIN, got their ass pinched when bringing food from point a to point b by a drunk patron, DOES get only 3% from Europeans because as a culture Europeans don't tip, and ran up and down stairs carrying platters of everyone's food. But how would you know that? You just stayed in the kitchen.
My gf's a waitress and puts up with plenty of shit from customers and other staff that phones it in everyday. Waitresses often also earn BELOW minimum wage because they are expected to make it up in tips. They earn their 20% everyday. Now go make me a sandwich, line cook.
-p-
polly @ Feb 12th 2007 8:53PM
Some people think cucumbers taste better pickled.
Farseer @ Feb 12th 2007 9:13PM
@ David:
Looks like I did strike a nerve. I did so unintentionally - I promise.
You're right. The kitchen always had it harder than the front of the house. That's why I didn't work back there, though I certainly respected each and every one of the cooks. They were great guys, and my tips relied partially on them doing a good job. But that was just the way I saw it. When you break it down, there are positives and negatives working on either side of the window. Regardless of business, the kitchen staff makes the same wage, while a slow night can kill a server's week. On the other hand, a busy night is horrible for the kitchen, but can pay a server's bills for the month.
I chose the front because I like to work with people and go out of my way to provide a happy experience. You picked the kitchen because you don't seem to have very good people skills. I'm not being disrespectful, simply observant (based upon the highly agitated way you've been posting), so I apologize if I offend you.
In the end, I'm glad to hear that you used the word "cooked" in the past tense. Seeing that you are so bitter about your time in the restaurant, I'm glad you no longer have to put up with that.
BTW, people can spend their money however they choose. If you don't agree with the games released on XBL Arcade or Wii VC, then don't buy them. You're not being held on trial here, and neither are any of us.
Peace.
Farseer @ Feb 12th 2007 9:17PM
Oh, yeah, and you're right - the "waitresses" always seemed to make more. Those of us without T&A didn't have it as easy...
Brandon Johnson @ Feb 12th 2007 9:56PM
Can't wait I love this game
Tucker @ Feb 12th 2007 10:36PM
Wow, somehow the conversation steered from how much Paperboy sucks to the social unfairness inside the diner. I love Joystiq.
...but seriously, Paperboy blows.