As the camera pans across the holiday vault, revealing our Santa-hat-wearing jolly geometric friend and the ever promised pastry, carolers sing an enchanting rendition of Jonathan Coulton's "Still Alive". We won't blame you for getting a little misty -- nor will we judge you for wanting to share the Aperture holiday cheer with these darling Christmas cards. If only there was a card we could send to our family and friends, reminding them that they are androids, and that android hell is a real place where they will be sent at the first sign of defiance.
