Take-Two details 'Hot Coffee' settlement; no receipt necessary
by Ludwig Kietzmann 
{ Jan 29th 2008 at 8:00PM }
Were you one of the "offended and upset" victims of Rockstar's infamous "Hot Coffee" scandal? Can you prove to some lawyers that you were traumatized by the insidious insertion of polygonal sexual activity into your violent killing sprees? If so, you'll be interested in Take-Two's recently erected website detailing the benefits of its Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas class action settlement.The settlement offers different levels of possible compensation depending on the proof violated consumers have to offer: An original, pre-scandal copy of the game "may" net you a neutered replacement disc; a detailed store receipt "may" result in a $35 cash payment; a credit card statement or check is worth $17.50; and a disc without receipt gets you $10.
If you have no receipt and no game, you stand to earn a whopping $5 for promising under penalty of perjury, cross your heart and hope to die, that you at one point purchased and played the offending game. If you're not planning on using the bill to dry your post-traumatic tears, perhaps you could put it towards Grand Theft Auto IV on April 29th.
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Reader Comments (Page 1 of 2)
Co @ Jan 29th 2008 8:07PM
"a credit card statement or check is worth $17,50"
yea lets get that corrected.
BananaBoat @ Jan 29th 2008 11:34PM
I was traumatized by the horribly rendered sex scenes. Unfortunately, actually getting the money would require effort that I consider to be worth more than the 15 bucks.
If they could get me a copy of San Andreas without the N word and the F word every two seconds, so that I could actually enjoy it, I'd forget that the hot coffee BS ever happened. No? K.
ViagraFiend @ Jan 30th 2008 10:12AM
N_ggers
Clue: "People who annoy you"
Oh! Naaaaaaggers...
Ted @ Jan 29th 2008 8:08PM
I pity the person who is anal enough to actually return their game for one that cannot have the hot coffee mod installed o_O
Trickob @ Jan 29th 2008 9:07PM
a "neutered replacement disc"
that made me guffaw
B1gC72 - PSN: KillaKornbread @ Jan 30th 2008 12:58AM
dude thats $35 if i can find the receipt and it's not like im playing anymore anyway. i dont buy the cheating devices so i would never be able to use the hot coffee thing anyway.
ViagraFiend @ Jan 30th 2008 10:52AM
@B1gC72
You suck and deserve to be beaten.
NeverSage @ Jan 29th 2008 8:09PM
If anyone here goes to collect, I will find you and pour hot coffee on you.
mr mobius @ Jan 29th 2008 8:12PM
Free money, although not much, and American so not likely to be adopted to UK? Either way I never bought the game as they could easily find out by my lack of game or PS2 in house.
The Artist formally known as Jesus @ Jan 29th 2008 8:24PM
I'll only be scared if you use McDonald's hot coffee
mike_p @ Jan 30th 2008 7:55AM
Finish Him!
*pours McDonald's coffee onto lap*
Joe @ Jan 29th 2008 8:12PM
OGM FRRE MONY!!!
Delgado @ Jan 29th 2008 8:50PM
Are you a cat?
RudyHuxtable @ Jan 29th 2008 8:13PM
Thank God for the Cross-Your-Heart-and-Hope-to-Die Act of 1874, which makes said gesture a legally binding... gesture.
Moofree @ Jan 29th 2008 8:56PM
And thank God for the Supreme Court's 1876 decision that actually sticking a needle in your eye is cruel and unusual punishment.
tmacairjordan87 @ Jan 29th 2008 8:14PM
$5 here I come!
Wilhelm @ Jan 29th 2008 10:02PM
Not sure why you were voted down, I lol'd.
tmacairjordan87 @ Jan 29th 2008 11:06PM
i'm not sure either. I'll have to think about it while I drive to the game store and use the $5 to preorder GTA 4.
NESv1 @ Jan 29th 2008 8:20PM
Why can't this just disappear from history? *cry*
NoTomorrow @ Jan 29th 2008 8:22PM
Being cash starved, I Will go and... oh never mind.
Go F**k yourself, Jack Thompson.
Mr.ESC @ Jan 29th 2008 8:23PM
I never liked that game,I'm not sure why I bought it in the first place.
Anyhow isn't too late for this?
Altairio @ Jan 29th 2008 8:35PM
Hey! Hey you! Yeah, you reading this right now! Just so you know, all your posturing on standing up for game developers, being a part of the "gamer culture" and making fun of Jack Thompson & co. means absolute DICK if you sell out for a measly $5 to $35. You've proven where your allegiance lies. Have fun spending that cash, it only cost you your soul. Oh, and congratulations, you are now part of the problem.
tmacairjordan87 @ Jan 29th 2008 9:08PM
um you can pretend to be righteous as much as you want, but dont be stupid on top of it. The money's gonna go out one way or another, and if none of us collect it then the government would just take it for themselves. Money to the people is always better than money to the government
Mr.ESC @ Jan 29th 2008 9:09PM
There must be a "Rage against the machine" song with almost the same exact lyrics,there must be one.
eldee @ Jan 29th 2008 9:26PM
I'd just like to point out that anybody seeking to get a quick payout for an old ass game for something they don't really care about should think again. Not only is it insipid, but it sends a clear message to the guys who write the rulebooks that people are offended by adult content, and those figures may come back to bite you in the ass next time jack thompson gets on his soapbox.
Altairio @ Jan 29th 2008 10:12PM
@ tmacairjordan87
Please read section 3 of the settlement starting on page 10. Particularly subsections E & H.
To sum it up for you: yes, by making false claims, you are potentially costing Take Two more money. They'll be paying out between $1.025 and $2.75 million, and the actual amount they'll pay depends on how many people like you there are in the world. And no, it doesn't go to the government.
umm....hello??? @ Jan 29th 2008 8:40PM
soooo....if I have an original release disc I only get a replacement disc and no cash?? but if I claim that I have the game (any released version) I get cash and keep the copy I have?
yeah.....THAT makes sense.
...and the settlement only says MAYBE because the Court has yet to approve the award(s) in case enough people object to the settlement that it needs to be altered in some way.
Sam406 @ Jan 29th 2008 8:41PM
Oh yeah, I am legally offended and traumatized by the material found in a game clearly marked for people 17 and up and that can only be found if you deliberately looked for it with a gameshark. But yeah, bring on the free mony.
Trickob @ Jan 29th 2008 9:04PM
http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=ticket_to_hell
"Pixels of Moral Decay" would be an awesome band name...
Saxon @ Jan 29th 2008 9:05PM
Bah, it's absolutely not free money; it's coming out of one of the pockets of one of the very best game developers. I still have my game I picked up on release date and a receipt for it but I'm standing by Rockstar and not taking the settlement. By taking this offer you're only giving credence to everything Jack Thompson stands for and harming a great company, not to mention breaking the law and perjuring yourself.
Shame on you, Joystiq, for encouraging this.
BigD145 @ Jan 29th 2008 9:09PM
I will now spend the rest of my life pretending to be 50 million people. I'll be dead, but at least I'll be rich. The carpal tunnel times "OMG over 9000!" will be so worth it.
Noel @ Jan 29th 2008 9:19PM
From the settlement form:
In order to receive any benefits – a replacement disc and/or cash – you must file a Claim Form and swear under penalty of perjury that you:
• Bought a Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas First Edition Disc before July 20, 2005;
• Were offended and upset by the ability of consumers to use third party software and/or hardware to modify and alter the Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas First Edition Disc to display the Hot Coffee content;
• Would not have bought the Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas First Edition Disc had you known that consumers could modify and alter the game content; and
• Upon learning the game could be modified and altered, would have returned it to the place of purchase for a refund if you thought this was possible.
While it's near impossible to prove 2-4, wouldn't you feel like an ass swearing to this?
ScottyGEE32 @ Jan 29th 2008 9:23PM
I wanna hear the results of how many people actually claimed this.
Ivan @ Jan 29th 2008 9:29PM
Take-Two's recently *erected* website
I dunno bout everyone else, but that one gave me a snicker
waynski1457 @ Jan 29th 2008 9:37PM
Hehehe, you just lost five dollars.
Batzarro @ Jan 29th 2008 10:27PM
2099
Teacher: And that's why medicine stopped existing. When people gained the ability to sue, after leaving a hospital better than what they entered, there was no point.
Student: Is that also why videogames ceased existing?
Teacher: Sadly, yes. Nearly a hundred years ago, a company was forced to offer money to pay for "damages" caused by a hard to get, hidden sex minigame. Pretty soon, everyone who was "offended" by any mods games could have sued every company in existence, led by the Troll Emperor Jack Thompson(thunder).
Ripcord83 @ Jan 29th 2008 11:22PM
OH SNAP!
i was just going through old reciepts too.
i actually have this one still, dated 11/16/04 paid 49.99
nvmisfit @ Jan 30th 2008 12:09AM
This is ridiculous. If anyone actually likes any of the GTA games, don't hurt the guys who made it by collecting any settlement money. If you don't like the "offensive" content of the games, then don't buy them. Honestly, how could anyone blame the company for being exposed to content that can only be unlocked by extreme effort by the game player themselves? I have to agree with Rockstar that they are not liable. Anyone who claims the "free money" is no supporter of the video game creators. Let Rockstar keep the money to use to continue to make entertaining games for those of us who don't take games too seriously and enjoy them for what they are, strictly entertainment. By the way if you read the details of the settlement, any settlement amounts could change depending on the amount of people that make a claim for the cash. So instead of getting $5 dollars, you may only get $1 dollar or maybe even less if everybody and their brother make a claim. Just don't bother and leave Rockstar alone you self-righteous hypocrites.
Saxon @ Jan 30th 2008 12:16AM
Amen!
ThornedVenom @ Jan 30th 2008 12:28AM
Why would ANYONE want to return their "defected" GTA copies for "neutered" ones when they had to go through all the trouble to willingly download and install the optional Hot Coffee unlocking mod themselves?
mccomber @ Jan 30th 2008 12:55AM
Is there a way to register as someone who has the original game, was never offended and would like to say this settlement is ridiculous? Because I'd really like *that* to be on their records.
mike @ Jan 30th 2008 1:04AM
DEAR GOD THIS IS A SCAM. Take a look at section 12.
"How will Class Counsel be paid?
Class Counsel will ask the Court for an award of attorneys’ fees and reimbursement of expenses in the total amount of
$1,000,000.00. This amount include approximately $955,000 in attorneys’ fees and approximately $45,000 for
reimbursement of expenses. Defendants has agreed to and will not oppose this request"
Sp pf the 1 million dollars awarded in court, $955 000 goes to laywers while only $45 000 goes to the various people who purchased the game. Thats a wopping 95.5% legal fee. And if we take part in this settlement, we agree to this. No wonder the started suing. the guys suing are making all the money and just using us "victims" as an excuse to get a huge paycheck.
If there is anyone willing out there, you could send them a letter and "opt out" of this, giving you the right to sue again on your own and not forfitting money to these laywers.
Just wow, a 95.5% take on the money.
mike @ Jan 30th 2008 1:06AM
oops im sorry i made a mistake. The laywers get a full $1 million out of who knows how much money. Still alot of money for the ones who initiated this case
Vegan @ Jan 30th 2008 1:58AM
What are you so surprised about? You just described every class action, ever. The lawyers get the money.
mike @ Jan 30th 2008 1:06AM
oops im sorry i made a mistake. The laywers get a full $1 million out of who knows how much money. Still alot of money for the ones who initiated this case.
Aramn @ Jan 30th 2008 3:48AM
No way in hell Am I going to return my game for the satisfaction of a
small group of pricks that are controling the public with stupid
comments about nudity on games while they show real and live violence
24/7.
Rockstar im sending you a check for $15 just to piss them off and $5 are for the preorder of GTA4. :)
Anthony @ Jan 30th 2008 4:31AM
Of course I was offended by it. You do realize this paved the way for interactive sex in Mass Effect right?!?!?!?!?!?!?!1111
JBourrie @ Jan 30th 2008 7:16PM
I wonder if, while creating the Hot Coffee scene, Rockstar realized that it would lead to Mass Effects customizable sodomy and virtual orgasmic rape?
Won't somebody PLEASE think of the children!?!?!?!
FOXHOUND @ Jan 30th 2008 8:07AM
I was offended by this game, and I am thumbing through my expand-o file of receipts dating back to my Magnavox Odyssey².
Sure, I noticed the game was called GRAND THEFT AUTO.
I also noticed the jarring, whorish lady on the cover seductively suckling the lollipop like some 2¢ street strumpet.
And let's not forget the low-brow humor, lewd language, and senseless violence mere moments into play of this game disc.
Lastly, that 'M' rating was misleading. Was it for MALES? MASOCHISTS? MANICALLY MANGLED MONGOLIAN MEN?
I can't wait to get my $35 out of a $50 game sale! >:O
...I honestly can't believe this was pursued so heavily. What a waste of judicial work, when it could've been better spent putting REAL criminals behind bars. Like a lot of those oil barons out there, LoL!
Juice @ Jan 30th 2008 10:26AM
F these lawyers. Our country has some real economic issues right now and they're pulling this crap. Get a life and be an American. Freedom of speech!