Burnout Paradise will 'transform,' Criterion vows
We're most certainly taking Criterion's promise to "TRANSFORM" Burnout Paradise through a series of content updates too literally in our rendering above, but the developer's added emphasis just begs, What if...? Not one for serialized numbers, Criterion has chosen nicknames for its upcoming expansion islands, which will be distributed in this order: "Cagney," then "Davis," and then "Eastwood." We're assuming that the absence of a "Bay" upgrade essentially puts to rest our interpretation of Paradise transformed, but it doesn't mean Criterion won't consider our pitch. "We want to know what you think and you better believe we're listening to what you have to say," Criterion states on its blog. So, you listening?












Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)
Danny @ Apr 4th 2008 1:32PM
Best Joystiq photo ever.
dabamf @ Apr 4th 2008 1:36PM
It's good, I grant you, but the Pong MMO picture was simply priceless:
http://www.joystiq.com/2008/02/29/pong-creator-nolan-bushnell-working-on-mmo/
Danny @ Apr 4th 2008 1:44PM
Touché.
Obie @ Apr 4th 2008 1:49PM
Agree, how come Joystiq's photoshop rocks or sucks...but never in between? hehe
ViagraFiend @ Apr 4th 2008 1:49PM
Disagree. The Nintendo money Mario 1-1 pic they posted today was my favorite.
Hashbrown Hunter @ Apr 4th 2008 2:15PM
Yeah Joystiq has two extremes with their photoshops:
'Interwebs Legend' Status
and
'Dirty Whore Throwing Up On Jack Thompson's Ass' Status
theturtle363 @ Apr 4th 2008 1:33PM
they'd be stupid NOT to give us transformers!
Vegeta (aka Ska Oreo) @ Apr 4th 2008 2:34PM
It would have to be G1. Or at least anything that does not include Bay's piece of shit Transformers.
FOXHOUND @ Apr 4th 2008 2:50PM
c'mon DEVESTATOR mod! :d
dabamf @ Apr 4th 2008 1:34PM
Split-screen multiplayer please!
Paul Nicholson @ Apr 4th 2008 1:56PM
Amen! Split Screen!
Logic Bus @ Apr 4th 2008 2:57PM
Agreed. The lack of this feature is the reason I don't own this game.
Tiptup300 @ Apr 4th 2008 3:16PM
What, I like how games are consistently losing key features from gaming history!
The Artist formally known as Jesus @ Apr 4th 2008 1:42PM
All of a sudden I realize that Criterion could make an amazing Transformers game
Maverick Saturn @ Apr 4th 2008 2:11PM
Transcrashers.
Hashbrown Hunter @ Apr 4th 2008 2:17PM
Or they could make it even better by taking a page from Tom Clancy's book: Transcrashers X
ThornedVenom (Harley Quinn Defense Force) @ Apr 4th 2008 8:46PM
I'd kill for Transcrashers... but it might be confused with transexual party crashers.
Djstawberryjam @ Apr 4th 2008 1:46PM
Lets see, Changes to that need to be done are well, KILL DJ Atomika then i will buy your game, Is it me but that guy just put you off buying any EA game, Imagine Army of two with that (although...nevermind) But any other EA game , If they remove that then well you have a good game!
Shmil (Brawl Code 2621-2310-1994) @ Apr 4th 2008 2:32PM
you know you can turn him off in the options, he'll only pop up to babble about events occasionally
Shmil (Brawl Code 2621-2310-1994) @ Apr 4th 2008 2:42PM
but you're right, DJ atomika is quite possibly as annoying as Navi at least navi never attempted to be witty to the extreme
Ninegauger @ Apr 4th 2008 1:48PM
The lack of the classic crash mode really dampened my need to purchase this game... so if they added it, who knows...
ViagraFiend @ Apr 4th 2008 1:50PM
Thats the only thing that kept me from buying it. Give me a true Crash Mode and my money is theirs.
Otsego_Undead @ Apr 4th 2008 2:03PM
ABSOLUTELY.
ARE YOU LISTENING EA? BRING BACK CRASH!
StrangeBum @ Apr 4th 2008 2:30PM
@Otsego
You better be careful, without the 'mode' attached at the end of 'crash' they could think you mean a certain bandicoot. They could probably buy those rights.
http://tinyurl.com/5vu38j
Paul Nicholson @ Apr 4th 2008 1:58PM
I'd also love to see them branch out to water...boats...nice :-)
dabamf @ Apr 4th 2008 2:05PM
That's one of the coolest things about Warhawk. You can play a split-screen game online, so there's a team of "dabamf" for massacre purposes.
Maverick Saturn @ Apr 4th 2008 2:12PM
What? Citeron or Burnout?
Burnout boats wouldn't make sense :(
Paul Nicholson @ Apr 4th 2008 2:51PM
How would boats not make sense.
We're talking about DLC add-on's here. Not a full game.
Just have a few crazy jumps and gaps you can do. A few races.
I think it'd be cool
Louie @ Apr 4th 2008 3:15PM
ooh, Burnout meets Hydro Thunder...sounds great to me!!!
Shagittarius @ Apr 4th 2008 2:16PM
Where the F is the Pod-Cast? I'm eating lunch in 45 mins I expect my pod cast to be here by the time i get back.
Christopher Ziemer @ Apr 4th 2008 2:47PM
Justin was finally fired and so you can expect a delay.
deaftly @ Apr 4th 2008 2:26PM
Speaking of Burnout, I saw this the other day and I threw up a little bit in my mouth.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=maK1SwiGbNg
Shmil (Brawl Code 2621-2310-1994) @ Apr 4th 2008 2:37PM
i couldn't finish watching that video
wootman @ Apr 4th 2008 3:45PM
i thought that might be a rick roll.
after watching it, i wished it was.
Beryan @ Apr 4th 2008 2:35PM
Burnout Paradise: Transformed
Holiday 2008
JakubK666 (Ninja Defence Force) @ Apr 4th 2008 3:28PM
Does that mean they'll add the reply button?
FireStiq @ Apr 4th 2008 5:13PM
Ba weat grana weep mini bon?
Danzig @ Apr 4th 2008 5:34PM
I hope they transform it back into the $60 I wasted when I bought that piece of crap.
Mrak @ Apr 4th 2008 10:00PM
Amen.
fyreblazer @ Apr 4th 2008 6:21PM
It only makes sense if Criterion adds the Stunticons to the line up. That pratically writes itself!
Cuja @ Apr 5th 2008 11:50PM
Metamorphis back to its original form if anything.
starsforeyes @ Apr 10th 2008 6:05PM
Crash Mode would be a great update.