Xbox Live down Monday morning for spring cleaning

by Griffin McElroy { Apr 19th 2008 at 11:30AM }

Did you know that every foul obscenity, racial slur, and homophobic epithet collects in the corners of Xbox Live, much akin to the mood slime in "Ghostbusters II"? It can cause some serious latency issues -- though unfortunately, it cannot be cleared away by a rousing chorus of Auld Lang Syne. It takes hours of tedious chiseling and scraping to clear this hate plaque from Microsoft's servers, during which time Xbox Live is made unavailable for CoD4 grinding and piñata swapping.

Unfortunately for those 360 owners with online gaming on the docket for this coming Monday morning, Xbox Live will be down for said maintenance for eight hours. Before you get your hopes up, Gamerscore Blog assured everyone that this is not the fabled spring update, just some routine sprucing. We know the thought of division from the gaming hivemind is unbearable, but we trust you can go without from 2 a.m. to 10 a.m. PST (that's 5 a.m. to 1 p.m. EST, or "Too Legit 2 Quit" to "Pumps in a Bump" in Standard Hammer Time.)

Tags: hammertime, maintenance, microsoft, server, slime, xbox, xbox-live, xbox360, XboxLive

Reader Comments (Page 1 of 2)

LoneGamer @ Apr 19th 2008 11:39AM

The time zone change in the article was done in reverse. 10 AM PDT is not 7 AM EDT, 10 AM PDT is 1 PM EDT.

copa @ Apr 19th 2008 11:53AM

Be patient. Justin's mom dropped Griffin on his head when he was a young child.

She was always a little more careless with the adopted one. Oops, SPOILER ALERT, Griffin!

A Pissed-off English Gamer @ Apr 19th 2008 4:17PM

Also, totally needs GMT :-)

KeenCommander @ Apr 19th 2008 11:39AM

Spring cleaning! Spring cleaning! Anyone else remember that episode of Rocko's Modern Life?

Hashbrown Hunter @ Apr 19th 2008 1:26PM

+1 just for the avatar

Matt B @ Apr 19th 2008 2:28PM

Nice avatar.

Mr Khan @ Apr 19th 2008 2:51PM

First thought in my head, too

R E C Y C L E Recycle
C O N S E R V E Conserve
Don't you P O L L U T E Pollute the river sky or sea
Or else you're gonna get, what you deserve!

Dan @ Apr 19th 2008 11:41AM

just to let you know est time is +3 hours and not -3 hours to pst time so it's 5am to 1pm est time that xbox live will be down.

Griffin McElroy @ Apr 19th 2008 12:34PM

Silly me. Did I get the conversion to Standard Hammer Time correct, though?

Hashbrown Hunter @ Apr 19th 2008 1:27PM

F**k yeah you did!

ssuk @ Apr 20th 2008 5:21AM

Grif, you're awesome. Just putting that out there.

JakubK666 (Ninja Defence Force) @ Apr 19th 2008 11:49AM

In before people bitching about "no teh le37 cod pwnage".Remember Christmas?

el serpiente @ Apr 19th 2008 12:30PM

Can anyone translate that for me?

JakubK666 (Ninja Defence Force) @ Apr 19th 2008 12:33PM

No awesome Call of Duty 4 ass-kicking.

Happy?

el serpiente @ Apr 19th 2008 12:45PM

ok, I was wondering what this had to do with fish.

ill trooper @ Apr 19th 2008 11:50AM

HAMMER, DON'T HURT 'EM!

Rususeruru @ Apr 19th 2008 12:03PM

Don't listen to him!
BAN 'EM ALL! BAN 'EM ALL! BAN 'EM ALL!

on topic: thanks for the heads up.

343 Guilty Fart @ Apr 19th 2008 3:34PM

Hammer dancing with James Brown = WIN

Frank @ Apr 19th 2008 12:02PM

that's a big twinkie

zombienutz @ Apr 19th 2008 12:15PM

I was worried until Griffin told the time in Standard Hammer Time. It is the only way to keep on schedule!

j.howlett @ Apr 19th 2008 2:51PM

i like the girls wit the pumps and the bump

Frank @ Apr 19th 2008 12:22PM

Xbox live down, this is headed for a disaster of biblical proportions. You may ask why biblical...

What I mean is Old Testament, real wrath of God type stuff.

Fire and brimstone coming down from the skies! Rivers and seas boiling! Forty years of darkness! Earthquakes, volcanoes...

The dead rising from the grave!

Human sacrifice, dogs and cats living together... mass hysteria!

waynski1457 @ Apr 19th 2008 2:31PM

is this true?

Fernando Rocker @ Apr 19th 2008 12:25PM

I love Ghostbusters =p

el serpiente @ Apr 19th 2008 12:39PM

If they call the wii a gimmick,
In your favorite blog,
Who you gonna call,

FER-NANDO

If you play Smash Brothers,
and you ain't no good.
Who you gonna call?

FER-NANDO

If you bought 'We Cheer',
and you're all alone,
Who you gonna call?

FER-NANDO

Fernando Rocker @ Apr 19th 2008 1:09PM

I really love my stalkers... I have a very nice and funny cult following me...

They take time of their life to bash me, they compose songs, change avatars... some others create fake accounts to say something about me... some others include my name on his nickname, and talk about me even when Im not in Joystiq...

Thats dedication...

I guess Anticrawl was right... I do have a cult of fellowers and stalkers.

=p

Vegnagun bwf @ Apr 19th 2008 1:21PM

Oh Fernando, you're so very pretentious.

el serpiente @ Apr 19th 2008 1:32PM

That was a tribute fernando, not a criticism. Don't be so defensive. =p

Fernando Rocker @ Apr 19th 2008 1:44PM

hvnlysoldr @ Apr 19th 2008 1:56PM

I love Ghostbusters too. NES advantage pad!

John McPoop @ Apr 19th 2008 4:48PM

@Fernando

Playing the stalker card again? I hate to tell you but by posting on this blog and being such an idiot troll people will despise you and go out of their way to make fun of you ... You need to look up the word stalker before you go throwing it around ... Besides this stuff is all in good humor anyway ... Your the only one here who actually sleeps with last months NPD sales numbers under your pillow in hopes the Nintendo fairy will bring you a dollar ;o ...

@The Serpent

You are fucking hilarious ... what's your PSN ID?

Zeus.:God @ Apr 19th 2008 9:05PM

Fernando may be a troll (which he is in my opinion) and an absolute 360/Wii fanboy (which he is also guilty of), but at least he's funny.

Rocko @ Apr 19th 2008 12:28PM

damnit, i have school off on monday and I was gonna spend the day playing CoD4 with some friends on live. Oh well, I guess local multiplayer will suffice.

mcatrage @ Apr 19th 2008 12:56PM

They don't want the same problems they had with COD4 around Christmas to happen to GTA4.

tacoman @ Apr 19th 2008 12:57PM

I thought the segue into ALF at the end of Too Legit was pretty classy. It's ALF! He's back...in youtube form!

Moffka @ Apr 19th 2008 1:41PM

I'm glad I'll be too busy playing MGO on Monday to ever notice this.

Kujel @ Apr 19th 2008 2:06PM

FOR THE OVERMIND!

kilodelta @ Apr 19th 2008 2:07PM

I WONT TEH .05 I'M PAYING FOR THIS SERIVCE REFUNDID FOR WHEN ITZ DOWN.

Angryfinne @ Apr 19th 2008 2:31PM

Strangely enough the message i got from x-box live this morning (everyone shoulda got it) referred to it as an upgrade.

Donald @ Apr 19th 2008 3:55PM

It is an upgrade - on the back end.

umm....hello??? @ Apr 19th 2008 2:32PM

damnit....I was hoping to play more LegendaryMapPack for Halo3....guess I can get started on MassEffect on Monday instead...

SoxFan13 @ Apr 19th 2008 3:30PM

I suppose you're going to tell me that Bill Gates is Vigo the Carpathian, right?

VictorInvictus @ Apr 19th 2008 3:40PM

Too bad my xbox RRoD'd yesterday...LIVE will be out of my grasp for a lot longer than a few hours on Monday. :(

Jonah Falcon @ Apr 19th 2008 3:40PM

Microsoft is adding servers to Live to handle the crush of Grand Theft Auto IV multiplayer. They're saying 6M or more copies on the first day of release? Better be prepared for the wave.

ThePremierAssassin @ Apr 19th 2008 6:31PM

Thats scary...

Sorta makes me not want to try the Multiplayer out on Day 1...I might just bring the whole network down...

zombienutz @ Apr 19th 2008 3:47PM

I think MS is taking down Xbox Live so everyone can go play in the MGS4 Online Beta.

NDstruct @ Apr 20th 2008 1:28AM

I think they are beefing up LIVEs servers for the spring update. I am of the belief that the spring update will usher in the era of free xbox live for all. I'm sure at this point it may seem crazy to most, but sony will have atleast something close to LIVE feature wise soon. How much longer can they keep selling something for the price of a game when the competition is giving it away standard. Sure current xbox owners and current live subscribers(like myself) have no real issue paying for a quality service, however the issue will come into play when selecting a new console for many. As for current gold members? Give them 5000 MS points. Members get something is return and MS has very little overhead as they will only see those MS points given right back to them. I beleive this will take place with the spring update...but if not now, it's coming. Or so I think=)