Squint at a new Duke Nukem Forever screenshot
by Jason Dobson 
{ Jun 25th 2008 at 5:00AM }
Oh that crazy Duke has popped up yet again, kicking ass and chewing bubblegum as only he can. At least, that's what we think he's doing. Truthfully, it's pretty hard to tell from the latest tiny screenshot to emerge from the ever-elusive Duke Nukem Forever, which has surfaced on 3D Realms' site as part of a plea for developers to join the company's cause.As for the Duke, looking at the screenshot we like to imagine that he's running to the grocery store, probably to pick up a pack of Stride. After all, the ridiculously long lasting flavor will serve our hero well while he, like the rest of us, continues to wait.
Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)
Nick the Hero of Canton @ Jun 25th 2008 5:10AM
OH SHIZNAP!
Nutchos @ Jun 25th 2008 5:11AM
The graphics look terrible from all the pictures shown so far. It's like he just got plastic surgery... 20 times.
mr mobius @ Jun 25th 2008 12:00PM
It's like two N64s duct taped together.
mr mobius @ Jun 25th 2008 12:02PM
Two N64s duct-taped together.
ahsayuninew @ Jun 25th 2008 5:21AM
More like "Kick bubblegum and chew ass". i kid, i kid. all i really know about this game ir that its been in production for like, a billion years. What would be really funny is if the came came out and was like, the bestest evar.
Extra Cheese @ Jun 25th 2008 5:36AM
At this point, being anything less will be a failure.
jl_Mafia @ Jun 25th 2008 5:46AM
"DUKE NUKEM (is taking) FOREVER!"
Scott @ Jun 25th 2008 6:23AM
ROFLMAO!
Where do you come up with these? Seriously, you should do standup!
...
Or hang yourself out of shame. They both end in the death though
Foetoid @ Jun 25th 2008 6:54AM
This guy needs to practise the ancient art of Seppuku!
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Seppuku
Farseer (GDI) @ Jun 25th 2008 9:28AM
wow, remind me to avoid bad jokes in the future... It's not everyday multiple people tell you to go kill yourself for a bad joke...
NATO_Duke @ Jun 25th 2008 9:49AM
Thank God someone gave me the Wiki for Seppuku. I would have no understanding of their point otherwise.
Moorio - XBL: peacebyanymeans @ Jun 25th 2008 5:44AM
Alright... how much did the Stride company pay you guys?
Ghen @ Jun 25th 2008 11:31AM
It would make a good commercial. The Duke chewing stride while he waits for his game to release.
Cal @ Jun 25th 2008 6:10AM
Did they decide to use graphics acceptable at the start of 'production', instead of what's expected now?
Scott @ Jun 25th 2008 6:28AM
If anyone here played the original C&C, the rendering reminds me of that >_>
The videos and stuff I've seen look good (enough, but I don't have the PC for it anyway). But that shot looks bad
Jason @ Jun 25th 2008 6:39AM
Lol looks wierd.
matt byrne @ Jun 25th 2008 7:25AM
At this rate it'll be launching on Xbox LIve Arcade in 2010.
Chase @ Jun 25th 2008 7:23AM
It looked dated... er.
Chase @ Jun 25th 2008 7:24AM
It looks dated... er.
(Now with post-posting proof-reading!)
*cries*
tc @ Jun 25th 2008 7:26AM
that want ad smacks of desperation
Tim The Enchanter @ Jun 25th 2008 2:49PM
Or vapor...
DiFiasco @ Jun 25th 2008 7:49AM
Vaporware 2008
Corbo @ Jun 25th 2008 7:51AM
Working on Duke Nukem Forever has got to be one of the easiest jobs in the world. If anyone says you're not working hard enough, you just release TWO low-res screenshots a year and claim you've doubled productivity.
James Lockwood @ Jun 25th 2008 7:59AM
It's never going to come out. They're laughing at you!
Jnas @ Jun 25th 2008 8:14AM
In all seriousness, does anyone actually care about this game?
Not trying to be a smartass or anything, i'm genuinely curious.
RobLink (Return of the McElroy Defence Force) @ Jun 25th 2008 8:54AM
You can put me firmly in the 'no' camp.
SugarDaddy @ Jun 25th 2008 11:55AM
I don't care about the game so much as the laughing stock that is 3D Realms.
SugarDaddy @ Jun 25th 2008 8:19AM
After seeing the fat-ass developers talk about wasting time playing WoW, I have very little hope for this game. I can't wait for it to flop.
VisionRx @ Jun 25th 2008 11:28AM
[quote]After seeing the fat-ass developers talk about wasting time playing WoW, I have very little hope for this game.[/quote]
Do you also have little hope for Valve based on the fact that Gabe Newell plays WoW?
why not the LS2LS7? @ Jun 25th 2008 11:30AM
It's heavy on the waiting and no so much the flopping.
If it never comes out, can it really be said to be a flop?
I think that's a koan. (and apparently when I use a foreign word I'm supposed to do this http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Koan)
SugarDaddy @ Jun 25th 2008 11:51AM
VisonRx: Um, I don't think you saw the video. Whats-his-face visited the 3dRealms studio to get a glimpse of Duke Nukem. The developers were old and fat and commented that the game was taking so long because they spend so much time playing WoW. So, based on that I conclude this game will flop. Old, fat, irrelevant wow-playing losers do not make good games. Prove me wrong, 3d realms. Prove me wrong.
Developers at Valve on the other hand can do whatever the hell they want. They actually release good games in a normal time frame.
tcc3 @ Jun 25th 2008 8:20AM
Wow the Duke Nukem Forever Easy Bake Screen Shot Generator really is coming along nicely.
What do you mean its a game?
T @ Jun 25th 2008 9:00AM
Is it me, or have all the screens released so far seemed incredibly generic?
Like the trailer is "Duke Nukem alone in a dark room.", one of the first screens was "Duke on a motorcyle", and now you've got "Duke running with a gun"
All are tight shots on Duke, with absolutely no way to get any kind of context.
Not to mention STILL no gameplay "screens".
NATO_Duke @ Jun 25th 2008 9:56AM
There was Jace Hall with gameplay video though. That would trump a screenshot to many folks.
T @ Jun 25th 2008 10:15AM
There was gameplay vids? Wow, how'd I miss that one!
guidedbyvoip @ Jun 26th 2008 12:33AM
yeah i saw the gameplay video, too. it does exist! whether it is anygood...well ask ShackNews and Jace Hall.
Noah the Great @ Jun 25th 2008 9:11AM
Ooh! The release date for DNF is probably behind the Blizzard ice. I know it's a different company, but hell had to freeze over before they could come out with it.
animeman_59 @ Jun 25th 2008 9:12AM
We don't care.
Joe @ Jun 25th 2008 9:36AM
IF you go to the 3Drealms site it looks like DNF will also be coming out on the 360 too. So that is great.
Adam @ Jun 25th 2008 10:09AM
this game will ship with 240X120 as its only supported resolution, mark my words
juju187 @ Jun 25th 2008 10:15AM
ppl still care?
Robobagins @ Jun 25th 2008 10:37AM
good god, even a TC MOD team by now would have released a 1.0 release(After forming, breaking up, reforming, working on an alpha, breaking up, adding new members, releasing a beta, starting over from scratch, breaking up, and reforming again).
To 3D-realms: Just stop now. It's okay. We won't be angry with you or blame you. You just need to drop this and forget about it. Please come back to us. We miss you.
your pal,
Reality.
Waffle Slayer @ Jun 25th 2008 10:46AM
"probably to pick up a pack of Stride."
He better pickup some Extra.
JAY JAY @ Jun 25th 2008 11:13AM
3D Realms is going to go down as the company who took "forever" with forever.
JonFitt @ Jun 25th 2008 11:40AM
Site is down
GreyLoki @ Jun 25th 2008 12:47PM
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/3D_Realms
Look at the list (under 3D Realms) of games developed as opposed to games produced. I think 3DR is really just pretending to be making this game while making their real money off licensing the Duke name or producing for other companies (i.e. Prey, Max Payne).
They're not going to released Duke Nukem Forever because it will never live up to the hype and will damage the brand.
michas_pi @ Jun 25th 2008 1:33PM
Ah, I see exactly what 3D Realms is doing.
We have to make our own DNF!
They release a screenshot here and there, and at the end they program an animated GIF maker for us to mash all of 'em together.
BAM! Instant immersion. Kinda like a Mad Libs or one of those create-your-own-story books.
Jamie @ Jun 25th 2008 1:59PM
This far along, and they still need *level designers*? Are they not even past alpha? Amazing.