We always think it's so bizarre when fanboys and girls start filling up our tips box with vitriol about the latest unpopular decision made by Sega, Square, Microsoft or practically anyone involved in the gaming industry. "Where do they get all that hate?" we wonder aloud, before going to donate more hugs down at the clinic. They would be a complete mystery to us were it not for Brett Ratner, who, according to a passing mention in a recent press release from MGM, has been tapped to direct the God of War film.
See, we hate Brett Ratner. Well, no, we don't hate the person. We're sure he's a perfectly nice man. But we hate everything he's ever put on film from Money Talks to X3 aka Brett Ratner's First-Person Theatrical Abortion. ... You know what? Forget what we said, we do hate Brett Ratner as a person. And if he directs God of War, it'll be awful, because all of his movies are awful and we don't know why he keeps being allowed to make them. The end.
Reader Comments (92)
Posted: Jul 25th 2008 2:58PM (Unverified) said
Fuck Red Dragon! It was a shitty remake. Watch the Micheal Mann Classic "Man Hunter". Not only are the characters developed better but the flaming wheel chair scene is fucking scary. Fuck Ratner!
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Posted: Jul 25th 2008 3:56PM spin cycle said
Red Dragon may have been okay, but it was pointless. Manhunter was fantastic and doesn't look dated even today.
I put Red Dragon right up there with the Van Zant Psycho remake or Jonathan Demme's remake of Charade. All of them are pointless, you'll never match the original.
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I put Red Dragon right up there with the Van Zant Psycho remake or Jonathan Demme's remake of Charade. All of them are pointless, you'll never match the original.
Posted: Jul 26th 2008 9:24AM (Unverified) said
manhunter looks dated as hell... (mainly the 80s clothes and music)... but its still an awesome movie.
I don't think any brett ratner movies are BAD, they just all seem to be pointless. Red Dragon, Rush Hour, X3... they are all just watered down versions of better movies, and none of them have any emotional impact/connection at all.
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I don't think any brett ratner movies are BAD, they just all seem to be pointless. Red Dragon, Rush Hour, X3... they are all just watered down versions of better movies, and none of them have any emotional impact/connection at all.
Posted: Jul 25th 2008 12:59PM WiNGSPANTT from TopTierTacticsco said
Whenever someone tells me they liked X3, I cease talking to them forever.
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Posted: Jul 25th 2008 1:10PM (Unverified) said
I liked it better than X2. But then I hated X2, so whatever...
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Posted: Jul 25th 2008 1:11PM Vegeta has a ps3 said
What? X2 was fucking awesome and is the only bright spot in a mediocre film franchise. X-men was alright, and X3 pissed me off.
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Posted: Jul 25th 2008 1:24PM (Unverified) said
Well, please note that I'm not an X-Men fan to begin with, so maybe that's part of it. While I liked X1 just fine (okay, some of the villains sucked), I had a few issues with X2.
NOTE: SPOILERS AHEAD
First, it had a bajillion characters and didn't spend time developing any of them. Maybe this was great for fans who just wanted to see all these characters, but I didn't care personally.
Second, with the exception of Pheonix (which, as a non-fan, I also didn't care about), nothing happened in the entire film. Or rather, everything that did happen was undone by the end of the film, like a bad TV episode. The bad guys joined the good guys, but then left again, big surprise. Some new enemies were made, but by the end of the film they were taken care of. Just... nothing in the film mattered. You could go from X1 to X3 and never know you missed anything, except you wouldn't know about Pheonix. That's it.
Thirdly, Wolverine's story sucked. They already pretty much explained it before, so now they just went in detail with it, but most of the details I had basically guessed anyway. And nothing that was learned changed the character of Wolverine. He was a badass that didn't know about his past and then he learned about his past and... well, nothing. It didn't change anything.
So basically, bad script and too many characters with too little development. What development there was was pointless, as were most of the introduced characters. I give it two stars.
Reply
NOTE: SPOILERS AHEAD
First, it had a bajillion characters and didn't spend time developing any of them. Maybe this was great for fans who just wanted to see all these characters, but I didn't care personally.
Second, with the exception of Pheonix (which, as a non-fan, I also didn't care about), nothing happened in the entire film. Or rather, everything that did happen was undone by the end of the film, like a bad TV episode. The bad guys joined the good guys, but then left again, big surprise. Some new enemies were made, but by the end of the film they were taken care of. Just... nothing in the film mattered. You could go from X1 to X3 and never know you missed anything, except you wouldn't know about Pheonix. That's it.
Thirdly, Wolverine's story sucked. They already pretty much explained it before, so now they just went in detail with it, but most of the details I had basically guessed anyway. And nothing that was learned changed the character of Wolverine. He was a badass that didn't know about his past and then he learned about his past and... well, nothing. It didn't change anything.
So basically, bad script and too many characters with too little development. What development there was was pointless, as were most of the introduced characters. I give it two stars.
Posted: Jul 25th 2008 1:42PM (Unverified) said
Ok, I stopped reading after
"First, it had a bajillion characters and didn't spend time developing any of them"
That right there is bull, they spent time on most of the characters...
Iceman and his family
Pyro joining Magneto
Wolverine and his past
The Logan/Jean/Scott love triangle
and so on...
Reply
"First, it had a bajillion characters and didn't spend time developing any of them"
That right there is bull, they spent time on most of the characters...
Iceman and his family
Pyro joining Magneto
Wolverine and his past
The Logan/Jean/Scott love triangle
and so on...
Posted: Jul 25th 2008 1:49PM (Unverified) said
Okay, perhaps I should rephrase and say "didn't spend enough time for me to care about the characters."
Better?
Reply
Better?
Posted: Jul 25th 2008 3:49PM (Unverified) said
I liked X3. Now leave me alone.
j/k. All the X-men movies were a joke looking back. They had so much potential, but i think they were a huge let down. had they waited a couple more years to start the series, they would've been so much better.
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j/k. All the X-men movies were a joke looking back. They had so much potential, but i think they were a huge let down. had they waited a couple more years to start the series, they would've been so much better.
Posted: Jul 25th 2008 3:53PM spin cycle said
I liked X3. Ratner has made a lot of crap (I couldn't even finish watching Rush Hour 3), but X3 isn't part of it.
He also produces Prison Break on FOX and a lot of people seem to like that.
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He also produces Prison Break on FOX and a lot of people seem to like that.
Posted: Jul 25th 2008 8:33PM (Unverified) said
Wasn't the entire trilogy made before Marvel Studios had full control over the production of their films? I heard that Iron Man was the first Marvel film in which Marvel Studios was in complete control, which would make sense as to why there is such a large discrepancy in quality between the Spiderman, X-Men, and Fantastic Four trilogies, for example, and the new Marvel movies.
But one way or another, the X-Men trilogy had Patrick Stewart and Ian McKellen, so just imagine how much worse the movies would have been without a couple very good actors playing such pivotal roles :)
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But one way or another, the X-Men trilogy had Patrick Stewart and Ian McKellen, so just imagine how much worse the movies would have been without a couple very good actors playing such pivotal roles :)
Posted: Jul 25th 2008 8:36PM (Unverified) said
Oops, caught my own mistake. Fantastic Four wasn't a trilogy :-p
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Posted: Jul 26th 2008 12:10AM spin cycle said
Marvel still doesn't have full control over the content of the films bearing their names. Not that it would make a difference if they did. Marvel can make mistakes as easily as Hollywood. Heck, they're more likely to do so.
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Posted: Jul 26th 2008 1:34AM ThornedVenom said
X2's greatest scene has to be the beginning White House scene.
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Posted: Jul 29th 2008 1:45PM (Unverified) said
You know, compared to other comic movies (Daredevil, FF2) X3 isn't completely awful, just mostly. And if you don't know the comics then you might not hate it..
What makes it so bad is how much potential it had.. But yeah, I agree, Ratner sucks big ones..
Reply
What makes it so bad is how much potential it had.. But yeah, I agree, Ratner sucks big ones..
Posted: Jul 25th 2008 1:00PM (Unverified) said
I don't want to get banned so I'll just respectfully disagree with you.
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Posted: Jul 25th 2008 1:00PM NaeemTHM said
Ratner should stick to making Rush Hour movies and stop ruining established franchises.
Actually, I would probably see God of War with Chris Tucker as his side kick.
Tucker: DAMN YOUSE RIPPED OFF DAT GUYS HEAD! YOU CRAZY KRATOS!
*Kratos proceeds to chop off Tuckers head*
Reply
Actually, I would probably see God of War with Chris Tucker as his side kick.
Tucker: DAMN YOUSE RIPPED OFF DAT GUYS HEAD! YOU CRAZY KRATOS!
*Kratos proceeds to chop off Tuckers head*
Posted: Jul 25th 2008 1:23PM Mr Numeros said
Do you understand the blood that is coming out of my mouth???
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Posted: Jul 25th 2008 1:02PM (Unverified) said
X3 and Rush Hour 3 were bad movies from him... To this day I forever hate x3.
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Posted: Jul 25th 2008 4:50PM (Unverified) said
Yea I remember seeing it in the movies and was just appalled when it finished. Ok Cyclops sucks, thats a given but you dont kill the guy! They basically just left the worst of the worst characters left (excluding wolvie and storm)
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Posted: Jul 25th 2008 1:05PM SirDigby337 said
it could have been worse...
..... they could have chosen Uwe Boll
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..... they could have chosen Uwe Boll
Posted: Jul 25th 2008 1:28PM (Unverified) said
Well...God of War has got B-Movie written all over it.And say all you want, but Uwe does have a great passion for movies, no matter how bad they are.
Now give him a big budget, and I think this movie wouldn't be so bad after all.
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Now give him a big budget, and I think this movie wouldn't be so bad after all.
Posted: Jul 25th 2008 1:32PM (Unverified) said
Passion is one thing, Talent is a completely different thing
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Posted: Jul 25th 2008 2:32PM (Unverified) said
Yeah but how much talent do you need to direct a movie which involves a dude cutting other dudes?
Vote for Uwe!
Reply
Vote for Uwe!
Posted: Jul 26th 2008 9:45AM (Unverified) said
Could you leave Our Uwe alone, please. Thank you.
Reply
Posted: Jul 25th 2008 1:06PM (Unverified) said
I think you gave too many hugs away down at the clinic.
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Posted: Jul 25th 2008 1:09PM dabamf said
Agreed...I'm still really pissed about X3. X2 was insanely good, no doubt in part to Bryan Singer's excellent direction (see "The Usual Suspects"). Unfortunately, Singer took a stab at Superman and failed miserably while Ratner was busy destroying the X-Men franchise. Why?!?!?!?!?!?!?! Curse you Athena!!!!!!!
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Posted: Jul 25th 2008 1:30PM foxhound said
I don't blame Singer entirely for SUPERMAN RETURNS; mostly because of the subject matter.
He's a hard character to write for, in the same way that the FANTASTIC FOUR are difficult do. Their tales are so "clean-cut" or "cliche'd" by this point that anything socially taboo & dark(like the X-MEN) or highly violent(like 300) would throw off the theme entirely. Add on the fact that Superman is so difficult to defeat by normal means, and you're left with the constant "throw the Kryptonite at him and hope for the best" villain angle is recited ad-nauseam.
The one thing I will blame Singer and WarnerBros./DC Comics for; would be the fact that they listened too closely to their shareholders. Spending ridiculous amounts of money on those new-age Panasonic HD Cameras, the copious amounts of money on the suits & set designs, and literally letting them tarnish a good concept into something that might as well be a Saturday afternoon movie... that's what killed SUPERMAN RETURNS for me.
Reply
He's a hard character to write for, in the same way that the FANTASTIC FOUR are difficult do. Their tales are so "clean-cut" or "cliche'd" by this point that anything socially taboo & dark(like the X-MEN) or highly violent(like 300) would throw off the theme entirely. Add on the fact that Superman is so difficult to defeat by normal means, and you're left with the constant "throw the Kryptonite at him and hope for the best" villain angle is recited ad-nauseam.
The one thing I will blame Singer and WarnerBros./DC Comics for; would be the fact that they listened too closely to their shareholders. Spending ridiculous amounts of money on those new-age Panasonic HD Cameras, the copious amounts of money on the suits & set designs, and literally letting them tarnish a good concept into something that might as well be a Saturday afternoon movie... that's what killed SUPERMAN RETURNS for me.
Posted: Jul 26th 2008 9:19AM (Unverified) said
I know Superman Returns wasn't a huge success financially, but I really enjoyed it. I went with my girlfriend, who isn't into comic book movies at all, and she enjoyed it too. the only other comic book movie she hasn't hated was Batman Begins.
I thought it did a good job both capturing the feel of the old superman movies, and trying to do something a little more grown up and less teenage. It felt very similar in style to Batman Begins to me.
Are they making another one? Personally I hope so, and I wish they'd move towards a crossover Batman/Superman movie in the future.
(x3 did indeed totally suck though...)
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I thought it did a good job both capturing the feel of the old superman movies, and trying to do something a little more grown up and less teenage. It felt very similar in style to Batman Begins to me.
Are they making another one? Personally I hope so, and I wish they'd move towards a crossover Batman/Superman movie in the future.
(x3 did indeed totally suck though...)
Posted: Jul 25th 2008 1:09PM (Unverified) said
I'm still not seeing it, but at least it's not Michael Bay...
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Posted: Jul 25th 2008 1:13PM Vegeta has a ps3 said
Thank god. Michael Bay is like Uwe Boll, except with a much bigger budget.
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Posted: Jul 25th 2008 1:33PM (Unverified) said
Hey. Hey. I loved Transformers.
...haven't seen any other Michael Bay movies, though.
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...haven't seen any other Michael Bay movies, though.
Posted: Jul 25th 2008 1:43PM (Unverified) said
Maybe you were watching a different movie than the rest of the world, but the live-action Transformers movie with Shia LeBeouf was terrible. All Bay had to do was show giant robots fighting and transforming for 2 hours and everything would have been okay, but could he do that? NO! He had to throw in some lame-ass masturbation jokes and dialogue that makes Star Wars Episode V sound coherent. But the worst thing he did was make the Autobots totally worthless. Why the hell were they even in the movie? Every Decepticon killed was killed by a HUMAN! And then, Bumblebee asked Optimus Prime's permission to speak. When, in the whole rest of the movie, did anyone ask Optimus Prime's permission for anything? And to add insult to injury they start making out on top of him at the end of the movie. I'm sorry, but Transformers was god-awful and that's a fact, not an opinion.
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Posted: Jul 25th 2008 1:48PM (Unverified) said
Now WRE
That's an opinion. One that millions of people completely disagree with you on.
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That's an opinion. One that millions of people completely disagree with you on.
Posted: Jul 25th 2008 1:51PM (Unverified) said
People can disagree all they want, but that just makes them wrong AND stubborn.
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Posted: Jul 25th 2008 3:30PM zsavior said
Wre you are some sort of Movie messiah, for a while now I have been talking about the atrocity that was the Transformers movie. And you summed it up perfectly. Yet Bay is still out there waiting, directing, shooting, his crimes still unpunished, and ready to be released on an unsuspecting audience all over again.
I'm scared....really really scared.
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I'm scared....really really scared.
Posted: Jul 25th 2008 3:39PM (Unverified) said
Thank God for Zsavior. I was starting to think that nobody on Joystiq had any taste in movies.
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