Criterion's forthcoming "Davis" update
for Burnout Paradise
will deliver not only an array of two-wheeled vehicles, but a taste of automotive irony. Whereas the series' signature sports cars all spectacularly crumple into balls of mangled metal when they collide with walls, poles and, best of all, other
signature sports cars, the bikes won't bend or buckle or break. And neither will the riders, safely disappearing from the game's E10-rated environment whenever they wipe out. MTV Multiplayer
's Stephen Totilo explains that when it comes to Burnout Bikes
, it's less about SMASH!
and more about ZOOM!
-- particularly in the update's speedy new single-player challenges and 8-player online, motorcycle-only events. Players can also expect a day-night cycle, weather effects (no, really!) and yes, wheelies.
We imagine plenty of people will bemoan the absence of bikers smashing their heads open on Burnout Paradise
's pavements, but hey, Criterion is still giving us a pretty substantial (also: free) addition. The only drawback we can think of is not having a place to hang our pair o' dice.