Nega-review: Fable II

"Fable II is short and easy, and the plot is mostly boring." (3) "Running through the core missions from start to finish would only take a handful of hours." (6) "You can race through the main storyline in around a dozen hours or so." (7) "There's not an incredibly large amount of content to go through, and it feels like Fable II pads the play experience by requiring you to venture multiple times through the same areas at different times throughout your journey to collect everything there is to find." (6)
"The story carries little weight" (2) with a "typical medieval revenge plot" (8) that's "slightly boring and sort of incoherent." (3) "The lack of meaningful character interaction and development is the reason the story often falls flat. ... Because the citizens of Albion are pretty one dimensional, it's difficult to get really attached to any of them. (2) "The simple combat and predictable story make the early moments feel slight." (2) and "the final boss fight is anticlimactic." (3) "If you're buying the game for the main plot, you're going to be disappointed." (3)

The much ballyhooed morality systems "aren't balanced... During our experience, we were able to max out our evil and corrupt status after only a few hours, whereas becoming completely good and pure when playing as a noble do-gooder took much longer." (2) "If all you care about is the Good meter, however, it's pretty easy to dump a boatload of cash to the Temple of Light and get it maxed out again, so the choice is a bit dulled." (3) In the end, "does it really matter to you if the town guard or the town thug gets the five warrants you've collected? I doubt this kind of choice has much of a real impact on a gamer." (4)
"When you start exploring the social aspects ... things take a downturn." (4) "Unfortunately, every social interaction still feels exactly the same as the first game." (8) "The expressions system is too goofy for the more serious tone of Fable II and almost every interaction feels artificial." (4) "While it is certainly amusing using these often lewd expressions to get your point across, it decreases your attachment to the rest of the world." (2) "You may even get bored of having to use the expression system countless times in order to curry favor with the denizens of Albion, which gets quite repetitive." (6) "You can access the likes and dislikes of anyone you meet via a menu, making it the entire process feel disingenuous." (4) "I mean, would you marry someone after they use the same expressions on you for just a mere five minutes?" (8)
Speaking of marriage, "the marriage system is actually kind of harsh and I had more than a few wives walk out on me for no apparent reason." (1) "I had a few weird glitches, including a strange moment when my character's spouse got angry, divorced him, and then quickly changed her mind, existing in a weird state of being happy and content until I left the area, at which point the game informed me that a divorce had occurred. It was very strange indeed." (3)

"Perhaps the biggest disappointment in Fable II came from the much-hyped dog ... It never acted like a real dog, and there was no illusion that it was anything but a gameplay element, so the game's attempts at making me care for it didn't work." (3) "I didn't find myself bursting into tears every time he nicked his paw" (1) and "you won't miss it during the periods of the game when you're dogless." (3) "His need to alert you of hidden goods before you have a chance to find them for yourself takes away some of the thrill of discovery." (2) What's more, "on occasion, you may see him walk through a closed door or witness the textures on his fur disappear." (4) Yes, "there are some issue with clipping - your dog frequently runs straight through solid objects (including your legs)." (7)
"The whole navigation and user interface could do with a bit of polish." (5) "The map is pretty useless," (2) inventory management is an issue," (6) and "even something as basic as shopping for new gear is made cumbersome and fiddly:" (5) In short, "the menus and interface are poorly suited for all of the things you'll be juggling at any given time." (1) "Also, it's not always easy to tell which parts of the environment you can walk up and which require a detour." (2) There's "occasional lag when a large number of enemies are present on-screen," (8) and "it doesn't help that there's a small amount of loading time between pressing pause and actually getting the pause screen, either." (5)
"The monetary system in Albion doesn't always make sense. If you purchase a store or rent out a home, you will receive money every five minutes. The problem is that you earn that commission every five minutes, whether you're actually playing or not ... which quickly makes currency meaningless. Since you're able to buy most weapons and properties by just waiting around for a few minutes once you're established, there's little sense of accomplishment in buying the item you've been pining for." (2)
"At some point, you'll want a job. There are some painstakingly pedantic offerings. ... A blacksmith, for example, must hit the A button when a dial crosses the green section of a meter. ... But it's not very exciting. The other jobs are more or less the same idea." (4) "Working jobs or extending expressions to impress all involve nothing more than good timing with the A button. It doesn't matter what job you happen to be doing either." (7)

"[Combat] is far too easy and there is very little variety in the enemies you battle." (4) The game may seem like a bit of a simplistic generic button masher at times when you're just swinging your sword and spamming spells (8) "None of [the enemies] ever create that sense of wonder and awe expected from a fantasy game," (4) and "with the exception of a single battle in Fable II, I never felt challenged. I was only 'knocked out' once -- and that was on purpose, so I could see what happens." (4)
Which brings us to death. "Death is almost never a concern." (3) After dying, "within five seconds, you'll be back on your feet, fighting the same enemies who seconds earlier seemed to have ended your life." (2) That's right, "within seconds you are back on your feet fighting again. Defeat just isn't punishing enough." (4) In fact, "it is not uncommon for your character to get back up, defeat the remaining enemies and receive more experience points in doing so than they lost." (7) "To give you an idea of how insignificant your own death is, your dog won't even notice your pain." (2) "You do receive a scar each time you die, but we were playing a demonically visaged overweight gay horror Pat 'Butcher,' who was happy to show off the battle scars as she threatened the local children for their lolly pops." (7)
"While it might sound fun on paper to have a friend join you on your adventures, it really seems to do the game, and the overall experience, a disservice." (1) "A henchman brings with them all their experience and skills but none of their weapons or their character model. ... Isn't one of the purposes of co-op to show how different my character is from yours?" (4) In addition, "you will both share the same view and camera controls. This leads to frustrating camera angles, and requires both players to stay in pretty close proximity. ... The time I spent with the co-op seemed to strip away a lot of the charm and joy that I found playing in single-player, and appears to be more a novelty than anything of substance." (1)
Welcome, gentle reader, to thy newest Joystiq Nega-Review. As is our wont, we have gathered up the minor negative points for a super-hyped, positively reviewed game and assembled them into an unforgiving whole. Our humble purpose is not to cut down an obviously storied work, but to point out that even well-regarded games have their flaws.
While this is by far the longest Nega-review we've done, and one of the lowest review score averages we've put up to the Nega-Review treatment, that doesn't by any measure mean the game is bad. Impressively, almost every review used here concluded by saying that, despite the flaws, Fable II was an engrossing, addictive experience. The play.tm reviewer put it, "The negatives are just somehow more apparent than usual because it's just a bit disappointing when you stack them up against the flashes of genius that Lionhead often display." In short, we hope this review doesn't make Peter Molyneux too emotional... it's all in good fun.
Sources
(1) Giant Bomb
(2) GameSpot
(3) WorthPlaying
(4) IGN
(5) Play.tm
(6) GameSpy
(7) Kikizo
(8) GamingTarget
(9) DailyGame











Reader Comments (Page 1 of 2)
Bigfoot @ Oct 23rd 2008 2:18PM
I love reading Joystiq, but I hate the random "commercial" that appears. D:
Jakka @ Oct 23rd 2008 2:32PM
...and the Lord said:
Thou shall not bitch about the adverts instead getting Firefox with AdBlock.
Markez @ Oct 23rd 2008 2:40PM
I've got firefox and still see 'em, so I maybe I have the stupids and haven't turned on the appropriate blocker or something.
Blazur @ Oct 23rd 2008 4:05PM
This site isn't nearly as bad as others.
Dirty @ Oct 23rd 2008 4:31PM
https://addons.mozilla.org/en-US/firefox/addon/1865
Rocketboy @ Oct 23rd 2008 4:34PM
Humm, Opera works just fine at blocking the random adverts as well.
Markez @ Oct 23rd 2008 4:39PM
Dearest Dirty,
I heart you.
Marky McFableGuy
Dirty @ Oct 23rd 2008 5:09PM
creepy
Jake11 @ Oct 23rd 2008 2:24PM
who the hell buys fable for the main story?
LilTmac2003 @ Oct 23rd 2008 2:30PM
Psshhhh.... Not me or something.
Also, if Peter Molyneux read this, not only will he get 'emotional', but probably he'll probably commit suicide or something extreme of that value.
Fable II rocks.
Vegnagun bwf @ Oct 23rd 2008 2:30PM
No matter how hard I try I can't seem to care about Fable II. Fable was a monumental disappointment, and Fable II is still falling much to short for what Fable I should have been.
Markez @ Oct 23rd 2008 2:33PM
It's falling short because you're playing it and not liking it? Or because you're not playing and want to not like it?
Danny F. @ Oct 23rd 2008 2:56PM
I think your problem is that your putting the pus.. uuggh I mean game on a pedestal...
Its just a game, I mean your wishing for it to be so much more but you end up disappointed. But its hard to be mad at the game when no other company has gotten close to a game like this. Thats just my opinion at least.
Vegnagun bwf @ Oct 23rd 2008 6:45PM
No, it's not wishing for it to be so much more. Fable was hyped up to be a go-anywhere do-anything-ever game. I was supposed to be allowed to climb onto roof tops, assassinate the heads of government, control guilds, fight in wars; I forget everything that was said, but still. It was supposed to be a single player MMO basically, with tons and tons to do. It turned out to be a pretty linear experience that totally missed the concept they were striding for. Fable II was sort of supposed to make up for that, the devs didn't lie about any features like the did with Fable, but they did sort of give off the impression that this was going to be the next-gen Fable -the Fable that the first was supposed to be. It's not.
And why did I get voted down for just saying I couldn't get excited for Fable? We have Fable fan boys on joystiq now?
DrHerbertWest @ Oct 23rd 2008 8:11PM
There already is a go anywhere and do anything game and its called "Real Life", and its really fricken boring with even more repetitive grinding than any gmae on any other platform.
NoHitHair @ Oct 23rd 2008 9:49PM
You're kidding me. The people defending Fable II's lack of non-linear and expansive play because "it's just a game" are getting +1?
Feel free to appropriate -1's in my direction for the following comment: you're all mindless fanboy twits. Incredibly and hopelessly stupid.
phr3qu3ncy441 @ Oct 23rd 2008 2:32PM
man... brutal.
Dirty @ Oct 23rd 2008 2:40PM
Ill be honest. As a big fan of the first, my first couple hours were a bit disappointing. I got addicted to chopping wood and buying businesses. Now that Ive moved into the story a bit more Im finding it more enjoyable it helps that my character is now evolving more based on my choices.
Mr Khan @ Oct 23rd 2008 2:46PM
I don't know about you, but i'm often disappointed with new releases when i first pick them up. It's generally after a day or two that i get really hooked. The only games in recent memory that didn't start with a meh were Galaxy, Brawl, and for some odd reason, Izuna 2. My first hours with Metroid Prime 3 led to a very generic impression, i actively hated FFTA2 after my first hour with it, though i went on to play it for a month and a half, and Okami was boring as piss pretty much until i got to that first forest area
Mr Khan @ Oct 23rd 2008 2:42PM
nega-reviews are the Bizzaro-world reviews. Making the best of the best seem like unvarnished turds.
I like this one because its particularly brutal in its out-of-context sort of way.
Dirty @ Oct 23rd 2008 5:16PM
I think they are fun because the fanboys come out with the "I told you so" kinda stuff, just to be down hammered. I would fight ignorance more if it wasnt so fun to watch.
PS Wii Music sucks. :p
keith @ Oct 23rd 2008 2:44PM
Great Game, period.
I will play through it twice.
kingoffighters23 @ Oct 23rd 2008 2:49PM
I'm about 6 hours or so in and I've encountered so many glitches and bugs it's almost frustrating enough to make me put the game down forever. Also, Xbox Live Co-op is a huge waste of time.
Killjebus @ Oct 23rd 2008 2:52PM
That is disappointing. I really like the idea that Peter is trying to do with this game. In your opinion, was it to ambitious?
Duke @ Oct 23rd 2008 3:12PM
Killjebus, you did notice that generally everyone else is giving the game praise right? I wouldn't just throw your interest into this guy's gripes.
Chase @ Oct 23rd 2008 3:12PM
Killjebus, it's a Peter Molyneux title. What do you think?
TwEE @ Oct 23rd 2008 3:25PM
I noticed it was filthy with glitches too, nothing game breaking or anything. Made me little piss at first, that and the control seemed loose and frustrating (but I just came off twighlight princess so that could be colouring my impression)..
Professor Lario @ Oct 23rd 2008 10:18PM
Speak more on the co-op please... I am torn between this and Fallout. This has been winning out due to sweet (or so I've heard) co-op gameplay. But if it ain't the shizznit, maybe Fallout is the pick.
therpham @ Oct 23rd 2008 2:54PM
I've been having a lot of fun so far, mainly because I enjoyed the first one and I was only expecting that level of entertainment. I have received a lot more.
kaneda26 @ Oct 23rd 2008 2:57PM
Man! Why do these "Nega-Reviews" always have to be so negative?!
They should make a "Posa-Review" that presents the best aspects of the sh*ttiest games on the market...as well as non-3rd party wii games.
Mr French @ Oct 23rd 2008 3:11PM
Thats.. that's a brilliant idea.
Felipe @ Oct 23rd 2008 3:15PM
they should start with e.t.
kaneda26 @ Oct 23rd 2008 3:22PM
I could go something like this
"E.T. is a very imaginative game (67) based on a really great movie from the 80s (83). It is the only ET game for Atari (35), so if you like ET and you only own an Atari, it literally doesn't get any better than this, in terms of wanting to play an ET game for Atari. Let's see...um...Oh Yeah! They don't make it anymore...that's pretty good (999)."
Superstar90 @ Oct 23rd 2008 4:16PM
Seriously, I'd love to see that. But it might lead to people buying awful games and then blaming Joystiq for hyping them.
Kyle Orland @ Oct 23rd 2008 4:27PM
I've considered the idea of posi-reviews. Only problem is, the really awful games (I meant the ones that get, like, 20/100 averages) are ones no one has ever heard of. Picking out the positive bits form these reviews wouldn't be interesting because there's no ocntext for the reader. Also, there aren't that many positive points to stretch into a full review. Maybe someday we'll figure out how to do it right.
Metal Geario 360 @ Oct 23rd 2008 3:13PM
"we hope this review doesn't make Peter Molyneux too emotional... it's all in good fun."
/sarcasm
Ha! Good one guys im still wiping tears of laughter! The wordy details that surgically whittle this Great Oak back to the f*cking stump it is.
Hee hee hee...
*All games are flawed from a jaded viewpoint.
tmacairjordan87 @ Oct 23rd 2008 3:22PM
Until I got to the dog part I thought I was reading the Nega Review to Fable 1. It has literally every problem that made the 1st one so painfully awful to me, so it looks like I'll have to knock it down to a rental now.
tmacairjordan87 @ Oct 23rd 2008 3:29PM
Also, as I feared, they made the game too casual. Almost impossible to die, no penalty when you do die, too easy to get a lot of money, overly simplistic combat...yeah definitely a rental now. Thank you casual gamers >:(
samfish @ Oct 23rd 2008 3:51PM
This is different from every other game over the past 10 years?
I can practically count on one hand number of games that have come out in the last decade that meet the criteria you just noted!
tmacairjordan87 @ Oct 23rd 2008 3:53PM
I'm sure I could too after seeing how many games have come out in the last decade.
TwEE @ Oct 23rd 2008 4:24PM
You seem to shit on a lot of games Tmac, out of curiosity what games are good enough for you (past or present), are there games out there you actully like?
tmacairjordan87 @ Oct 23rd 2008 4:31PM
It's true I am critical of games, but as a result I almost never buy games that I regret. I've probably bought 3 games in the last 15 years that I truly hated and later said "wtf was I thinking".
I'm gonna buy Dead Space, LBP, Gears 2 and R2, Banjo, and Farcry 2 when I can. I'm also going to a midnight launch for Fallout 3 monday night, which I know I'll love because I loved Oblivion. It's also gonna be the first time I've ever gone to a midnight launch event so I'm kinda excited.
I hated the first Fable with a passion, so this one had to step up but it has every problem from the first game. I would be retarded if I bought the sequel to a game that I hated when it retains all of the reasons that made me hate it.
ExMcCloud @ Oct 23rd 2008 5:39PM
Mac give it a chance...lol....If your buying Banjo on blind Faith like I am then go get Fable 2!!
Arnon @ Oct 24th 2008 4:25PM
Except when you die, you lose a ton of exp and get nasty scars all over your body. Now that I think about it, when does a game ever have a penalty for dying.. except for restarting at some point, which to me, isn't a penalty. Just a nuisance.
AnEternalEnigma @ Oct 23rd 2008 3:23PM
What the fuck kind of word is "niggling" (in the first paragraph)?
Haggard @ Oct 23rd 2008 3:58PM
Means something that bothers you but subtly, so "I had a niggling feeling of guilt".
It is not, in fact, a racist action verb.
kaneda26 @ Oct 23rd 2008 8:33PM
That's a relief. I was thinking it was a racist way of referring to a black midget.
RiccochetJ @ Oct 23rd 2008 3:25PM
I love the orbs floating around. It makes it a mini mmo of sorts. One of my best experiences so far was when I was chopping some wood.
I was minding my own business happily chopping away and getting a real good streak going, when suddenly this NPC comes right into my view and starts hitting on me. I missed because it was so distracting thus making me start all over again.
Being frustrated I yelled at my screen, "Get out of my view and stop hitting on me while I'm cutting wood or I'm going to put this F$%^& axe in your forehead!"
Suddenly I hear a ton of laughing coming out of my headset which was sitting beside me on the couch. Apparently I left my mic on.
This game is really making it hard to be good.
samfish @ Oct 23rd 2008 3:27PM
I've never played a Fable game.
...Is it more along the lines of, say, Zelda or is it more of a Final Fantasy or Mass Effect type of game?
My gut tells me I won't like it, but it looks interesting to me, at least.
Mr Khan @ Oct 23rd 2008 3:31PM
It's a more mature variant of Zelda that goes much heavier on the RPG elements (in character choices, etc)
The original, at least, had the kind of charm that makes Zelda famous, albeit in a manner less appropriate for children