Army using arcades to find new recruits
by Jason Dobson 
{ Jan 7th 2009 at 2:55AM }
Wide-eyed youth: "Boy, mister, would I!"
Conversations similar to the above are likely unfolding at Philadelphia's Franklin Mills Mall, where the Army has setup 'The Army Experience Center,' a $13 million arcade designed to earn the favor of local gamers and persuade them to trade in their quarters for military-issue green. The arcade, a 14,500 square foot vortex of patriotism, is home to three full-scale military vehicle simulators and a host of games -- most of them of the shooty variety.
Entertaining, yes, though the center is also designed to educate visitors about job opportunities in the Army, with recruiters on hand to weave nationalist prose to anyone inclined to listen. Of course, like America's Army before it, the ultimate goal is to get youngsters (though nobody under 17) to sign their name on the dotted line and report for duty.
It's something that has not been panning out exactly as Uncle Sam might hope, with only 35 visitors enlisting since the facility opened in August, a figure the New York Times reports is "slightly below" the rate of the five traditional recruitment centers the arcade replaced. This might -- might -- have something to do with real bullets stinging a smidge more than fake ones. Just a thought.
Reader Comments (Page 1 of 3)
RookieJr @ Jan 7th 2009 3:04AM
So why did you decide to join the army, solider?
I want to protect my country sir!
And you, why did you enlist?
Well, I went to this AWESOME arcade this one time...
Alien Lord @ Jan 7th 2009 3:06AM
+10
aMac @ Jan 7th 2009 3:10AM
Respawn times in the real army suck.
bigsofty @ Jan 7th 2009 8:34AM
"Respawn times in the real army suck."
Lol, quote of the year.
MakAttack @ Jan 7th 2009 11:09AM
Yeah, and "camping" is literally sleeping on the ground, under tents, with you and your rifle in the sleeping bag.
Mabui @ Jan 7th 2009 11:28AM
The sudden thought of what Spawn Camping becomes when applied to real life crossed my mind.
Irwin @ Jan 7th 2009 12:21PM
Yall should season 1 episode 3 of pure pwnage if you havn't already..
;)
Dr Jeckyl and Mr ESC. @ Jan 7th 2009 1:06PM
"The sudden thought of what Spawn Camping becomes when applied to real life crossed my mind".
Several soldiers waiting outside of a maternity ward?
Scooter @ Jan 7th 2009 3:12AM
I would join the Army but I live in Canada and I think you've heard the joke about the submarines.
playwhutyalike @ Jan 7th 2009 9:23AM
Is that the one where they have screen doors on them?
BlaqueBeird @ Jan 7th 2009 11:43AM
Yours has screen doors? Somebody's spoiled.
AirIntake @ Jan 7th 2009 12:51PM
I think he's referring to the West Edmonton Mall submarine defense force. It's been protecting us from mechanical octopus attack since the 80's.
Scooter @ Jan 7th 2009 1:07PM
Yeah, we're not Polish or anything.
aj @ Jan 7th 2009 7:18PM
The West Ed submarine force was destroyed by a barrage of pennies. Once they get the toy boats working, revenge will be swift.
Snook @ Jan 7th 2009 3:18AM
So is the part where you shoot unarmed civilians from a tank while jamming out to death in the regular missions, or maybe it's a bonus round?
Snook @ Jan 7th 2009 3:19AM
death metal*
BadassSailor @ Jan 7th 2009 7:21AM
It's right after the part where you defend the rights of the brainless assholes who get all their opinions from a Michael Moore porpoganda film.
BadassSailor @ Jan 7th 2009 7:21AM
It's right after the part where you defend the rights of the brainless assholes who get all their opinions from a Michael Moore propoganda film.
Michael @ Jan 7th 2009 7:52AM
@BadassSailor Right on Brother!
xGeneral DEATHx @ Jan 7th 2009 11:28AM
+Infinity for BadAssSailor.
Sheppy (of the Fidlious Clan of Wong) @ Jan 7th 2009 1:57PM
But shortly before you break geneva conventions of recruiting children by allowing anyone under 17 to even enter, right? Right?
BadassSailor @ Jan 7th 2009 2:13PM
Anyone under 17 with parental approval. And the geneva convention States you can't recruit children under 15 years old, but those between 15 and 18 may voluntarily serve.
Nice try sheppy, a 2 second google would have turned that up for you.
Since I've seen 12 year old prostitutes in some of the countries I've been to, I wouldn't say recruiting at 17 with no possible way you'd be in the line of fire before 18 is all that bad.
purplejeezus0008 @ Jan 7th 2009 2:20PM
@badasssailor
Gotta love that ad hominem for labeling the soldiers in moore's movie as liars.
justshovejayohbe @ Jan 7th 2009 2:26PM
I love how you judge countries by the local prostitutes (whose customers are sailors!)
Have you ever been to an American port?
That meat-packing district in NYC is a real shining city on a hill isn't it?
BadassSailor @ Jan 7th 2009 2:41PM
maybe you should research where moore got the soldiers for his movie. he ripped footage from unrelated interviews and made them look like these were soldiers talking about how awesom killing civilians are.
I guess you didn't know about the guy who lost his arm in the video suing moore for using his likeness without permission? Oh it turned out that the interview was about new prosthetics and had nothing to do with the war...
And those idiots in the tanks were not even FROM the current Iraq war, that footage was over 10 years old from the first gulf war. you seriously think in 2004 we were still using Discmans?
But hey, believe what you want.
soviet chick @ Jan 7th 2009 3:15AM
$13,000,000 and it has mostly "shooty games"? Install Evil Knight, Terminator 2, and Virtua Cop 3 cabinets and I'll move to NY and enlist then and there.
Only problem is, I'm a cross-dressing homosexual pacifist with a spot on my lung and flat feet...
soviet chick @ Jan 7th 2009 3:29AM
Make that "Evil Night"
http://www.arcadeflyers.com/?page=flyer&db=videodb&id=2169&image=1
playwhutyalike @ Jan 7th 2009 9:24AM
Well, it's Operation Human Shield for you then!
xGeneral DEATHx @ Jan 7th 2009 11:26AM
And all this time I envisioned you as being Kournikova-like and wearing sexy combat gear. Sigh...
BigD145 @ Jan 7th 2009 2:42PM
Haven't you heard? Their standards have been severely lowered now that the recruiters are committing suicide. Just walk in the door and sign your own papers.
Charlie_Six @ Jan 7th 2009 3:25AM
Psh. We Americans like to express our patriotism through virtual military service, not actual military service. Get with the times, Uncle Sam.
When you finish creating an army of remote controlled robots that I can shoot people with from the safety of a control room 50 miles away, gimme a call.
Rollins @ Jan 7th 2009 4:47AM
I'm pretty sure they already have those.
Unfortunately, they also have sufficient people to control them. D:
BadassSailor @ Jan 7th 2009 7:23AM
They have that. It's called a Reaper, it's basically an armed predator drone.
bobartig @ Jan 7th 2009 11:11AM
50 miles away?!? They have a drone facility in like Arizona, or Utah that pilots unmanned drones in Iraq. You get to go home every night and see the family, although there is some research showing that this can be even more stressful in certain ways because your mind is forced to endure 12-hour periods of combat stress, then return to normal life every day. So, it might break your brain.
BadassSailor @ Jan 7th 2009 12:03PM
No different than standing in the engine room for 6 hours a day, then putting in your 10 hour work day, then running stupid assed fire drills and stuff at night, only not getting to see your family at night.
All the military has hard parts, but it's still a worthwhile experience.
Pat @ Jan 7th 2009 3:58AM
The place is awesome, but it doesn't do a good job of making you want to join the army. I flew the apache simulator into mountains like 3 times.
They have madden there, too, for some reason unknown to me
Duke @ Jan 7th 2009 10:12AM
Maybe they weren't trying hard to recruit you after they saw you destroy 3 virtual Apache helicopters.
xGeneral DEATHx @ Jan 7th 2009 11:30AM
Lulz.
BananaBoat @ Jan 7th 2009 4:17AM
Isn't this the kind of thing that would only work on Forrest Gump?
In A World (XBL) @ Jan 7th 2009 4:18AM
If you can successfully equate real violence with simulated violence to impressionable teenagers... man, that's really the best way to steal the soul of America one piece at a time.
This whole thing is predatory and unconscionable!
SoxFan13 @ Jan 7th 2009 6:33AM
Philadelphia, eh... Oh no, Chris Grant is going to Iraq!?? Isn't he, ISN'T HE?!?!?! First 1up, now this.
Michael @ Jan 7th 2009 7:50AM
as someone leaving for basic here in a couple weeks, I have to say this, I'm so fucking sick of you god damned lazy and cynical fuckers. if you don't wanna join shut the fuck up and stop disrespecting us who do/have...It doesn't make you look "cool" to shit on our nations military, you sit there and bitch about how things are done, but are not willing to do anything to change it...here's a giant FUCK YOU to all of you. I'm Damn Proud to call myself a Sailor.
Skipjimroo @ Jan 7th 2009 8:07AM
I'm damn proud to call myself a sailor too.
But then, I'm just a sucker for any outfit that entails a jaunty little cap and a tight, stripy T-shirt.
Shiver me timbers indeed!
Morisato @ Jan 7th 2009 8:11AM
Remember what you said today. My friends joined with the same attitude, but after being fucked by the military so many times... he realizes how young and stupid he was. I feel you will do the same.
bigsofty @ Jan 7th 2009 8:36AM
Haha, your an idiot.
baby sea tuna @ Jan 7th 2009 8:58AM
Hope you come back with all your limbs, you rude ape.
How's that for cynical?
meist3r @ Jan 7th 2009 9:06AM
Then go and fight your unjustified war, kill innocent people and die for nothing you insensitive clod!
Fuck you and every one with you attitude. I appreciate those that join the military to defend their freedom but those who leave their brains at home and whole heartedly buy into the shit your commanding officers tell you about what you are actually doing make me sick. If you were a true American patriot as you seem to believe of yourself you would fight AGAINST going to the military and instead try to get other people to leave so that silly war doesn't get any more innocent citizens to sacrifice on the political altar of shame.
Good day to you and may you come back in one piece, sir!
Duke @ Jan 7th 2009 10:19AM
meist3r, you seem to be the insensitive one with that post. Don't you think you made a lot of assumptions about the man and his morals?
I don't think it's cool to just sh*t all over someone because they are joining the armed forces. Though you may not like the present war - he isn't the one that picked the war we are in. It wouldn't be a very good move for everyone to just bail on the military because they don't like the missions they are assigned.
You obviously have not thought out the ramifications of what you believe soldiers should be doing. The benefits in your scenario would be far outweighed by the cons.
meist3r @ Jan 7th 2009 1:02PM
Soldiers are soldiers to fight and to die. I know that. That's what they choose. They blindly follow orders because scruples keep them from killing their enemy otherwise. That's why I won't be a soldier unless I personally am in peril and need to defend myself. I can't hand over the responsibility for my actions. That's what I believe in.
I'm not shitting over this guy because he's joined the forces. I couldn't care less. But his fucking attitude and self-righteousness of reasons is what I'm shitting on. It sounds like he didn't think about why he actually joined and what he is actually doing (and I don't mean become a sailor I mean supporting the wrong cause for the wrong reasons).
The problem with that "scenario" that you call my reality is that the US wouldn't need that big of an armed force if they hadn't spend their time basically pissing onto everybody's porch since the beginning of their history. Granted, they always fought for freedom but unfortunately, if you haven't noticed, the definition of freedom always depends on what side of the cage you are on.
The "need" for a military of the current magnitude has only come into being because instead of defending themselves like everyone else does and having maybe a couple of troops for international security purposes in NATO or the UN these guys have been known to outright start conflicts out of political mood swings. I'm not saying WWII was none of their business, I'm glad they did what they had to -though a tad late. But most of the other conflicts, just like this one, were basically politically motivated chest thumping to maintain their illicit status of "nation with the biggest balls that they dangle in front of everyone's face". No wonder they have to have so many soldiers, with the amount of enemies they made for themselves they need a $700bn arms contract just to keep those at bay that have a motif. This is not even counting the abstract threats they claim to be fighting just now. Then they make up lies and manipulate the public reception to get more and more poor fucks to join their cause. Once they realized they've been had its already too late. I'm really astonished that you defend that.
These "ideas" let alone political ambitions that lead to these conflicts are no reason to kill thousands of innocent people. Sure, other countries do that as well but how can the self-proclaimed "city upon a hill / shining beacon of freedom" lower itself to the level of these criminals on a regular basis? Heck, the USA are basically pioneers for certain types of crime against human nature or revived things that were long thought dead in the "western" world. (Don't even get me started on the refusal of international treaties and such). It doesn't solve anything you know? The USA have already killed approximately more than 150.000 civilians in Iraq and Afghanistan and forced millions into refuge. For what? As revenge for ~3000 dead Americans that were killed on 9/11 by an independent group of stateless individuals? Who then is it who decides to kill/invade/destroy a country if what you are looking for has no body? It's the generals and political leaders and to follow them into everything they say is just wrong. No matter who you are. How can a country that has proclaimed itself the world police (Fuck Yeah!) violate so many laws itself and even outright refuse to play by the rules of the organisations that they strive to lead?
I'm from Germany so I oughta know what blind obedience can lead to. You want to argue that? Had the SS men laid down their weapons and refused to round up Jews, things could have ended much less horrible. But they didn't because as you mentioned they were well trained soldiers and just obeyed what their commanders told them and bought into the propaganda. So they threw away their compassion for fellow humans, demonized a whole people on false assumptions of threat and committed genocide. EXACTLY ... to the WORD. What is happening right now, in a sense, with the so called "War against Terror" (funny thing really, according to the Nazis the Jews were also threatening the security of the homeland and had to be defeated no matter what -even outside of Germany itself, weird coincidence). So you're saying a vendetta murder ratio of 1:50 is a proper way to convince people of your good will? Sorry but that's a load of bull.
Why are there more and more deserters? They can't cope with fighting for these fake inhumane ideals of power and submission. You only don't hear about them because they flee into exile to escape prosecution and hide in secrecy. The American media is so completely biased that they won't even mention them. That's what the world has come to ... AGAIN. The USA fought Nazi Germany to stop just that and now they're basically worse in some respects. Good job. Sure they don't round up muslims and execute them ... but the only reason why they don't, that I can infer from the right-wing political opinions of their leadership. is because they couldn't deal with even more enemies that then would step forward from the world community.
As the self-proclaimed "Best country in the world" which always has freedom written on it's flag it's basically your duty as an American who believes in the constitutional rights to refuse to fight for these unqualified and fraudulent reasons. Those who still comply for whatever reasons are spurred by a false sense of blind patriotism. What quota of the American military actually serves with a distinct understanding of what is going on? Most of them do exactly what you just told me I should honor: Sign up, Shut Up, Fight. There is no such thing as "If you're not with me you're against me". There are hundreds of facets in between but as with many things ... the Americans have leveled that.
Yes call me whatever, your country protected my country from itself. Too bad there is not one nation in the world that would or rather could do the same for you.
justshovejayohbe @ Jan 7th 2009 1:38PM
meist3r, very well put. Reminds me again of how desperately in need of foreign dialog and communication Americans are.