Kanye West once tried to sex up Mario
by Justin McElroy 
{ Feb 23rd 2009 at 11:30AM } 
"My game was very sexual," Kanye West told Details magazine, describing a hack he attempted to make on a home computer as a child. "The main character was, like, a giant penis. It was like Mario Brothers, but the ghosts were, like, vaginas. You'd have to draw in and program every little step. It literally took me all night to do a step, 'cause the penis, y'know, had little feet and eyes."
... What's that, it's quittin' time at the blogging factory already? Well, thank you, Mr. West.
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Reader Comments (Page 1 of 2)
Donald @ Feb 23rd 2009 11:33AM
No amount of "..." can express my "..."
WINterfang @ Feb 23rd 2009 11:49AM
What about?
... ...
Troy Powers @ Feb 23rd 2009 11:59AM
Pedo-bear album covers...pervertedness
Strategy_Panda @ Feb 23rd 2009 5:44PM
no amount of penises can express your jubilation?
coolforever4537 @ Feb 23rd 2009 11:34AM
Ummmmm...O_O
Cena @ Feb 23rd 2009 11:35AM
...
...yeah, no.
snowy @ Feb 23rd 2009 11:38AM
"You'd have to draw in and program every little step. It literally took me all night to do a step, 'cause the penis, y'know, had little feet and eyes."
I dont think Kanye knows what he was doing, it sounds more like he was making a flip book.
macgyver @ Feb 23rd 2009 11:50AM
yeah, this whole statement from Mr West screams 3rd grader trying to impress his peers by saying dirty words that could get him in trouble with adults.
The Baron @ Feb 23rd 2009 12:19PM
Well, it did say that ultimately he never made the game.
Brucie_K @ Feb 23rd 2009 11:38AM
Hahaha, oh wow.
That's all I got to say.
samfish @ Feb 23rd 2009 11:39AM
Sounds like my kinda game!
Hashbrown Hunter @ Feb 23rd 2009 11:57AM
Well judging from your now infamous avatar, I'd have to agree.
Zertoss @ Feb 23rd 2009 12:02PM
FapPING AS usual, I see.
Samo @ Feb 23rd 2009 12:36PM
Still want to know where to get that pic of your avatar, samfish :p
Sam @ Feb 23rd 2009 2:43PM
doubt there's any more to that pic than he has in his avatar, Peach has always been a tease XD
esposch @ Feb 24th 2009 1:32AM
Oh, I thought you'd prefer a Princess Peach rape simulator. I guess I was wrong. :)
GenBanks @ Feb 24th 2009 8:41AM
He already said one time where he got it one time I think... apparently the site has a green background.
Chris D.(PSN: Aggie_CEO | XBL:The Aggie CEO | Steam: Aggie_CEO @ Feb 23rd 2009 11:46AM
Really Kanyeeeezy???
WINterfang @ Feb 23rd 2009 11:50AM
I feel most stupid after reading that.
blindfromthesun @ Feb 23rd 2009 11:51AM
Kanye: "I want fewer fans."
This is how you do it.
Nigeria @ Feb 23rd 2009 11:51AM
It's called Drawn to Life.
ZeroCorpse @ Feb 23rd 2009 11:54AM
Gee... You'd never know from his "music" that he has such a pedantic and puerile mind.
/END SARCASM MODE
aj @ Feb 23rd 2009 11:54AM
He should have followed through. A penis based platformer would have made him a very rich man.
Shagittarius @ Feb 23rd 2009 11:55AM
Are those Pedo-bear puppets on his hands?
Hashbrown Hunter @ Feb 23rd 2009 11:55AM
Hey at least it's creative.
Also, I'd like to nominate this post for "The Best Headline for a Post in the Year"
GearSecond!! (Gamertag: xGearSecondx ) @ Feb 23rd 2009 11:57AM
....wtf man
Maverick Saturn @ Feb 23rd 2009 11:58AM
Most erm....innovative... game of the year.
Saying that, I do think Mario needs sexing up, for god sake, hes how old now and still a virgin :S He still hasn't even saved peach let alone gotten her in bed, lol
GearSecond!! (Gamertag: xGearSecondx ) @ Feb 23rd 2009 12:05PM
Peach's a shiesty hoe
Zertoss @ Feb 23rd 2009 12:08PM
I thought Mario was a eunuch, just going by his voice.
samfish @ Feb 23rd 2009 12:10PM
Mario's not a virgin. Pauline was all over him at the end of Donkey Kong. Plus, she dresses like a total slut. You KNOW Pauline gives it up easy.
reebo @ Feb 23rd 2009 12:15PM
I really don't like Kanye West, and this game has no influence on that.
Kuro @ Feb 23rd 2009 12:31PM
best comment on the article
Ignatius @ Feb 23rd 2009 12:26PM
What the hell?
Vitamin A @ Feb 23rd 2009 12:52PM
Talk about digital penises. Is penis plural peni?
Bendok @ Feb 23rd 2009 3:23PM
No. You're thinking of octopUS > octopi, cactUS > cacti.
WhatIsThatThing @ Feb 23rd 2009 5:47PM
Actually since octopus is not a Latin word, the plural is actually octopuses.
The more you know!
Evan @ Feb 23rd 2009 12:56PM
Walking penis game? It sounds typical of the stuff my friends and I programmed on our C64s and Amigas when we were 12 years old. When I was growing up (and when Kanye West was growing up - we're almost the same age), all computers came with BASIC, and I think every boy who tinkered with a computer tried to recreate his favorite commercial game in BASIC. And we put penises in, because as adolescents, we thought penises were rude and funny!
So, nothing sounds unusual in Kanye West's story, except perhaps that he was a bit of a geek when he was 12 years old. But, his Daft Punk remix, and music video with Takashi Murakami's animation, already shows that he has a geeky side.
What I wonder - what do kids do now, since computers no longer come with BASIC? I guess some try Flash, but it seems like fewer kids today program as a hobby.
QAguy @ Feb 23rd 2009 1:13PM
Yeah I read that he started making music first by making music for his rudimentary games he programmed. He also is a very good artist, he had an art scholarship and dropped out to pursue music. People act like because he's a rapper that he just couldn't be into programming or a geek. In fact like you stated before anyone that follows him knows he's a big anime nerd and tech geek.
After saying all that I think he flubbed when he said "Mario" and "Ghost"...LOL
SytheMaster @ Feb 23rd 2009 4:05PM
Most just download the compailer for their programming language of choice. In my case Dev C++ to program in (You guessed it!) C++. If the person doesn't have the brain power to download and install a compailer there's a reason why they're not programming as a hobby!
P.S. sorry if this turns out as a double post.
zhine @ Feb 23rd 2009 4:46PM
I think you mean "compiler..."
If people really want to program, just do it in Linux. Kanye was 12 awhile ago; he was probably just messing around in BASIC.
Deeznuts420 @ Feb 23rd 2009 1:03PM
well this is the perfect time to post with my avatar.
Osman @ Feb 23rd 2009 1:07PM
MIEN EYES!!
xGeneral DEATHx @ Feb 23rd 2009 1:49PM
Ah, seeing that avatar always makes me horny...
...DISGUSTED!!!! I MEANT DISGUSTED!!!!
Giroro @ Feb 23rd 2009 1:14PM
Since when were there ghosts in Mario Bros.
... Or was he trying to talk about pac man?
CJC @ Feb 23rd 2009 1:19PM
The Boos?
j.howlett @ Feb 23rd 2009 1:16PM
it sounds normal to me. kids draw them on text books, i've seen a number of levels in lbp. when we learned how to make flip books in art someone did a naughty one. look what happened in spore
ChiTownRuler23 @ Feb 23rd 2009 1:17PM
Dam Kanye your repping Chicago all fucking nuts.
ripslymemc @ Feb 23rd 2009 1:53PM
Kanye, how could you be so thoughtless?
Gambrinus @ Feb 23rd 2009 2:39PM
Shrug, say what you will, but it's cool to hear that he was a nerd too.
Hashbrown Hunter @ Feb 23rd 2009 3:18PM
Kanye West is nothing more than a nerd trying to be a superstar. Which he is. But he's also pretty goddamn nerdy, he just doesn't admit it.