Japanese hardware sales, March 9 - March 15: Turn-based edition, part deux

by Griffin McElroy { Mar 22nd 2009 at 9:15PM }

Video above provides suggested musical accompaniment for the following post.

A wild Japanese Hardware Sales Chart attacks!

I choose you, PSP!
PSP uses Greatest Hits!
PSP's accuracy sharply increased!
Sales Chart uses Scanlines!
PSP's accuracy sharply fell!
PSP is storing energy...
Sales Chart uses Dyschromatopsia!
Japan is afflicted by colorblindness!
PSP uses Color Change!
But it fails...
Come back, PSP!

Go, Xbox 360!
Sales Chart uses No New RPGs!
It's super effective!
Xbox 360 uses Exclusive DLC!
Xbox 360 regains health!
Sales Chart uses E74!
Coins scatter everywhere...
Xbox 360 fainted!

I choose you, PC!
Sales Chart uses Red Arrows!
It doesn't affect PC...
PC uses The Path!
Sales Chart became confused!
Blogger uses Great Ball!
Blogger caught a Japanese Hardware Sales Chart!

- PSP: 43,463

16,105 (27.04%)
- PS3: 28,014

11,821 (29.67%)
- DSi: 27,564

4,538 (14.14%)
- Wii: 17,941

1,381 (8.34%)
- DS Lite: 11,571

331 (2.94%)
- Xbox 360: 8,378

6,616 (44.12%)
- PS2: 4,844

110 (2.22%)

[Source: Media Create]

See: Would you like to rename the captured archives?

Tags: japanesehardwaresales

Reader Comments (Page 1 of 2)

rTwelve @ Mar 22nd 2009 7:52PM

"Would you like to give a nickname to the captured archives?" would be more correct. Trust me, I've seen that text several times today already.

flanker22 @ Mar 22nd 2009 11:06PM

LOL, such a cleverly written article.

OMGOMG @ Mar 22nd 2009 9:18PM

I'm so scared right now.

Markez @ Mar 22nd 2009 9:20PM

Despite apparently being too old to have gotten in on the Pokemon silliness; TV or videogames, that was still pretty comical, Griff, good job. No surprises here, altho some of the % pts look pretty meaty.

ice~ @ Mar 22nd 2009 9:20PM

I'm dying on the inside

Johnathan @ Mar 22nd 2009 9:24PM

I love these.

Foetoid @ Mar 23rd 2009 1:44AM

This is why i come to Joystiq, and also why every forum i have ever been on that discusses gaming at all, i always recommend people look to this site for news and general comedy. The MyMedia sites are probably the only sites i visit besides this one for gaming discussion.

http://www.myfrag.com.au
http://www.mywii.com.au

etc etc, my360, myps3, myDS, mytelly. Excellent friendly social sites to kick back and talk about gaming. I highly recommend them.

Julian @ Mar 22nd 2009 9:25PM

Ps3 comes in second and doesn't even get a part in the post? lol

Popfrogs @ Mar 23rd 2009 12:53AM

I know right? I had to double check the URL, I thought maybe I was on Kotaku for a second.

Rhamsey @ Mar 22nd 2009 9:25PM

holy crap, listening to the music fit perfectly with the way it was written. nice joystiq.

PSN: Erdie (Now equipped with 360!) @ Mar 22nd 2009 9:30PM

A clap for your effort, Griffin.

Mr Khan @ Mar 22nd 2009 9:30PM

Epic.

Also: apparently PS3 has settled into its higher orbit over the Wii for now. Things are going to get interesting.

Hyams @ Mar 22nd 2009 9:43PM

It'll drop back down eventually, probably in April time.

Noshino @ Mar 22nd 2009 10:11PM

uh, I dunno, I think it is likely to increase or maintain based on the sales of Musou Orochi Z

Mr Khan @ Mar 22nd 2009 10:30PM

Ahh, i had forgotten about Musuo Orochi Z.

When is Samurai Warrior 3 coming?

Noshino @ Mar 22nd 2009 10:43PM

It was announced as an 09 Wii-exclusive title, but there have been no estimates as to when it is exactly coming.

kwizzeh @ Mar 22nd 2009 9:33PM

I applaud you good sir.

HitNRun @ Mar 22nd 2009 9:34PM

I used the middle button on my mouse to scroll down slowly as the music played. Truly a gourmet reading experience.

Wiizer @ Mar 22nd 2009 9:35PM

Griffin, this part:
Video above provides suggested musical accompaniment for the following post.

Should be placed before the youtube clip, don'tyathink?... and switch 'before' with 'below' if you really wanna get poke-crazy~

Wiizer @ Mar 22nd 2009 9:36PM

*or 'above'... whatever.

Kool_Kid_Joe @ Mar 22nd 2009 9:35PM

I sadly admit that I have a pet peeve for people who make fun of Pokémon dialog and get the tenses and wording wrong. I can't guarantee this is correct, but it's closer, at least...

A wild Japanese Hardware Sales Chart appeared!

I choose you, PSP!
PSP used Greatest Hits!
PSP's accuracy sharply rose!
Sales Chart used Scanlines!
PSP's accuracy sharply fell!
PSP is storing energy...
Sales Chart used Dyschromatopsia!
Japan is afflicted by colorblindness!
PSP used Color Change!
But it failed!
Come back, PSP!

Go, Xbox 360!
Sales Chart used No New RPGs!
It's super effective!
Xbox 360 used Exclusive DLC!
Xbox 360 regained health!
Sales Chart used E74!
Coins scattered everywhere!
Xbox 360 fainted!

I choose you, PC!
Sales Chart used Red Arrows!
It doesn't affect PC...
PC uses The Path!
Sales Chart became confused!
Blogger threw a Great Ball!
Gotcha! Japanese Hardware Sales Chart was caught!

Freestyle Farfetchd @ Mar 22nd 2009 9:58PM

I, who should probably know better didn't notice. *doh*

The_Punisher @ Mar 22nd 2009 9:40PM

You have no idea how hard i just laughed.

You made my day.

Foetoid @ Mar 23rd 2009 1:47AM

We all know exactly how hard you just laughed, the place smells of shit.

F1 @ Mar 22nd 2009 9:45PM

LOL! God I love when they do these!

Cubivore @ Mar 22nd 2009 9:49PM

Griffin, you are amazing. Thank you for this special gift.

~Snipes~ (PSN slycooper_rocker) @ Mar 22nd 2009 9:53PM

ahahaha i loved that! +1 griffin!

BigD145 @ Mar 22nd 2009 10:07PM

PS360! Use your Splash Attack!

JerJer @ Mar 22nd 2009 10:17PM

lol i laughed at the PC's "the path" attack. loving the game so much right now.

Zertoss @ Mar 22nd 2009 10:33PM

I bought some lmaonade in Celedon.

Drew @ Mar 22nd 2009 10:56PM

I gave mine to some thirsty little bitch.

Nomi @ Mar 22nd 2009 10:33PM

Nice seeing Sony topping the charts for a change...

Ipsum @ Mar 22nd 2009 10:41PM

Brilliant.

Chyld989 @ Mar 22nd 2009 11:06PM

Effing awesome. Good job Griff.

Anticrawl @ Mar 22nd 2009 11:13PM

Now I wanna buy Pokemon Platinum. Thanks Joystiq.

Eduardo @ Mar 22nd 2009 11:40PM

oh how low do joystiq's subliminal marketing go

plus I want to buy platinum too now

Viakenny @ Mar 23rd 2009 10:17AM

does that explain the lack of Nintendo news/moves here?

Levi @ Mar 22nd 2009 11:19PM

I liked it

I wanted to see what would happen when he chooses the PS3... But the ending was good :)

Foetoid @ Mar 23rd 2009 1:52AM

Go, Ps3!
Sales Chart used LTD Wii Sales Figures!
It's super effective!
Ps3 became Confused!
Ps3 used George Foreman Attack!
It hurt itself in it's confusion!
Sales Chart used RE5 sales!
Ps3 fainted!

Sexualchocolate @ Mar 23rd 2009 7:12AM

Um, didn't you look at the numbers? - This is Japanese sales. They aren't fooled by shiney FPS games and a cheap, broken console like the majority of Western idiots.

Go PS3!
PS3 used it's rapidly expanding library
Xbox users still shouted "there's no games on that Blu-ray player"
PS3 used it's 4:1 lead in Japan
Xbox used yet another shit Halo game, but missed.
PS3 laughed
The Japanese looked confused and wondered why the West buys this shit??
PS3 worked perfectly for years, even under EXTREMELY heavy use.
Xbox360 E74'd after an hour session.
Microsoft laughed and rubbed it's greedy hands together, we're not fixing that for free, it's not a RROD! Bwahahaha.
PS3 used the RE5 sales figures (4:1 in JAPAN)
Xbox360 paid a shitload for an exclusive to try to keep idiots buying their old tat.
The Japanese didn't buy it, and continued to buy the better console.

Xbox didn't faint but just went over to the West where people are stupid and greedy and would rather buy 4 errorboxes than 1 PS3 because the initial outlay wouldn't leave them enough cash to eat McDonalds everyday that month.

Either that or their kids want a console and their welfare payments can only afford an errorbox, and they weren't exactly going to bring their state-income-generating-kids up themselves! Fuck that!

mazza_man @ Mar 23rd 2009 7:48AM

I think sexualchocolate has anti-western issues...

Sexualchocolate @ Mar 23rd 2009 8:13AM

I'm not generally "anti-Western" but the amount of people paying Microsoft to rip them off is giving us a real bad name.

I think the Japanese sales charts really show the true value of each console.

Apart from the Wii, which has probably saturated the market over there by now. Any console that can engage the general non-gaming population like that deserves to sell like it has.

Japanese companies make brilliant consoles and other electronic products.

American companies make a shit load of money by ripping off any given target market.

Microsoft have tarnished the games industry by ramming their fat greed fingers into it. The worst thing being that so many people have fallen for it and even continue supporting it after realising they've been had.