Overheard@GDC09: TTP = Time To Penis

by Kevin Kelly { Mar 24th 2009 at 4:09PM }

During the "Spore's Wake: What Seriously Happened?" panel at GDC, we learned a fantastic new meme that we have to share with you. "Time To Penis" (or just "TTP" in the streetz) is defined as the amount of time it will take children to make something rude out of a set of tools they've been given -- typically, that object is a penis. Apparently, TTP can be measured down to the near-second. In Spore's case, TTP was actually a negative factor since "children" were making penis monsters before the Creature Creator was even officially released!

Did you know? That little guy on the right is generally considered to be Spore's first penis creature. Don't stare, though -- he's shy.

Tags: ea, gdc-2009, meme, overheard, spore, ttp

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Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)

The Baron @ Mar 24th 2009 4:12PM

Is the TTP lower for premature-ejaculators?

Brythefry @ Mar 24th 2009 4:16PM

Drawing penises as a kid can be a known psychological condition (Ref: Superbad)

Tucker @ Mar 24th 2009 4:18PM

That's not a penis, it's a one-eyed monster!

...oh wait

smcn @ Mar 24th 2009 4:20PM

The best "penis creature" i've seen wasn't actually just a penis, it was a single creature made to look like 2 creatures doing the nasty. A brilliant work of art indeed. Just wish I still had the youtube link.

sinai @ Mar 24th 2009 4:21PM

8========D

TTP!

THE WICKER MAN (BWF) (GT: Dalek Prime) @ Mar 24th 2009 4:31PM

8==============D its a chain of ttp!

samfish (is ready for MadWorld!) @ Mar 24th 2009 4:47PM

8=D

Rhamsey @ Mar 24th 2009 4:49PM

88====================D
(chuck noris)

Shmil @ Mar 24th 2009 4:56PM

8=================================================================================================================================================================================================================

Shmil @ Mar 24th 2009 4:57PM

============================================================================

Shmil @ Mar 24th 2009 4:57PM

========D

Fuck it came unraveled! anyone have a winch?

samfish (is ready for MadWorld!) @ Mar 24th 2009 5:06PM

No, but I know this really hot wench.

6====D
ripped open ball sack!

Zertoss @ Mar 24th 2009 5:14PM

So I heard we were sword fighting ITT.

Ω
| |
| |
| |
oo

Kamizar @ Mar 24th 2009 5:14PM

Shmil, your penis is broken, you might want to see a doctor.

8=====D (TTP'd cause I like fitting in =D)

Mister Bogus (Mr. ESC) @ Mar 24th 2009 5:45PM

WTF? 8 doesn't equals D.

D is not even a number is a letter,silly internet.

CH3BURASHKA @ Mar 24th 2009 6:13PM

Apparently the Google Maps TTP has already been measured:

http://www.guardian.co.uk/uk/blog/2009/mar/24/penis-drawing-roof-google

Negativecool @ Mar 24th 2009 4:25PM

Time To Penis (TTP)?

I should just start telling my wife "TTP!"

That's so much better than "It's not going to suck itself!"

Thanks GDC, you've saved my love life.

samfish (is ready for MadWorld!) @ Mar 24th 2009 4:25PM

Speaking of which, it's spring time and thus TTP women joggers at the park.

BBL, y'all!

Donald @ Mar 24th 2009 7:28PM

Jonathan Coulton would like to remind you that TTP is not until the First of May.
http://www.jonathancoulton.com/songdetails/First%20of%20May

Burritoclock @ Mar 24th 2009 4:32PM

Hell, I'm 27, and whether it Drawn to Life for the DS, or Spore, or a BLANK SHEET OF PAPER, I immediately draw as many penises as quickly as I can.

And it's funny everytime.

Shmil @ Mar 24th 2009 4:36PM

I sign my checks with pictures of penises

Rhamsey @ Mar 24th 2009 4:51PM

i love drawing a penis in my friends passenger side door, so they dont see it, and everyone is thinks hes an ass.

Negativecool @ Mar 24th 2009 4:56PM

I sign get well cards for dying children with cock drawings.

I win.

Zertoss @ Mar 24th 2009 5:09PM

I grab people's characters off of DeviantArt and draw penises on them. Yes, that includes the female characters.

I even showed one of them to its original creator. She slapped me.

Burritoclock @ Mar 24th 2009 6:10PM

My personal best would be my Little Big Planet Penis level, it is a work of art.

Features:

-Giant penis ejaculating on your head when level starts.

-Giant ejaculating penis, with arm that strokes

-Giant penis car, it achieves an incredible speed before...

-above mention car rams into a woman colon, which you precede to walk through until you come to the

-Penorvator!! The most beautiful penis shaped elevator you have probably ever seen, probably.

-and finally a disembodied head felating a, YOU GUESSED IT!!! a penis.

and all that pretty much proves "TTP", because it was my first level.

F1 @ Mar 24th 2009 7:17PM

@Burritoclock
It's funny cause they're so small.

Kamizar @ Mar 24th 2009 4:34PM

Problem: People think it's hilarious to be "obscene" and make penises.
Solution: Make penises less taboo.
How to: Everyone wear less pants.

Don't question me, just do it.

Ghen @ Mar 24th 2009 4:48PM

No thanks. I'm not in to seeing that many penises. One is enough

mr mobius @ Mar 24th 2009 4:57PM

I hear vaginas are taboo...

F1 @ Mar 24th 2009 7:18PM

You just want to get inside my pants huh?

BigD145 @ Mar 24th 2009 7:23PM

Maybe then we'll actually get some good first tries. This particular penis monster doesn't look all that much like a penis. I guess the kid that did it doesn't really know what he's looking at.

Brian @ Mar 24th 2009 4:39PM

Ha, like the STC (Start to Crate) system.

Neuromancer @ Mar 24th 2009 4:57PM

Got to love Old Man Murray.

samfish (is ready for MadWorld!) @ Mar 24th 2009 4:59PM

8====3:•D
Clown TTP

Seiggy @ Mar 24th 2009 5:08PM

I vote for the next game rating system for FPS's to be TTTB - Time to Tea-Bagging!

Cellien @ Mar 24th 2009 5:22PM

Lawlz, the comments are too much.

___
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Cal @ Mar 24th 2009 5:25PM

You might want to get that checked out, I don't think they're meant to look like that...

Negativecool @ Mar 24th 2009 7:34PM

Is that supposed to be a broken cock with a mole on the nutsack?

Cellien @ Mar 25th 2009 12:11PM

It's a classic case of 'fail'. I found it on a site and copy/pasted.. I think it has an STD, I just spread it to Joystiq.

j.howlett @ Mar 24th 2009 5:33PM

will TTP appear in esrb descriptions?

horngreen @ Mar 24th 2009 6:04PM

Uhhh if your penis EVER looks like that see a doctor.

Obie @ Mar 24th 2009 6:19PM

Oh my God, we have become Kotaku!

sinai @ Mar 24th 2009 7:54PM

no, we have...

[click to read rest of post]

Linkario @ Mar 24th 2009 6:59PM

That is a bong, not a penis. Both can be smoked but look fairly different.

F1 @ Mar 24th 2009 7:20PM

Sounds like you had a bad experience. It's ok man, let it all out.

molecule @ Mar 24th 2009 8:06PM

Just FYI

TTP is not a new meme. It was first uttered by the developers of Ultima Online sometime around their alpha/beta testing phase about 12 years ago.

Apparently, it didn't take long after opening for someone to drop piles of gold onto the ground in a pattern to create a huge penis.

I think they may have called it "Time To Cock" though...