Rumor: Partial script for Driver film adaptation leaked

by Griffin McElroy { May 23rd 2009 at 10:00PM }

"DRIVER, 25, a test driver for Audi Germany in his mid-twenties -- a little Beckham, a little McQueen -- with munchy hair and intense blue eyes that show a focus that's laser-like."

These precious words constitute the first sentence of the Roger Avary-crafted screenplay for the (currently on-hold) film adaptation of the Driver series. The first five pages of the "HIGHLY CONFIDENTIAL" script (written circa fall 2006) were recently leaked to superannuation, an anonymous (but extremely reliable) gaming news source. We have no idea who did the leaking, nor are we entirely certain of the script's veracity. Still -- a blogger can dream. If you have the literate faculties to do so, please take the time to lose yourself in this all too brief masterpiece.

Update: The mastermind behind superannuation contacted us, informing us that he (or she?) was the one who actually discovered the script. Good find, sir! (Or madam!)

Tags: adaptation, driver, driver-script, film, roger-avary, screenplay, script

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Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)

Jinsenken @ May 23rd 2009 10:05PM

"He car takes off with burning rubber"

"Extreme Close-On"

Lol. Just cause it's a first draft doesn't mean there can't be some editing along the way.

Maverick Saturn @ May 23rd 2009 10:05PM

The film industry has run out of ideas ¬_¬

I tried really had not to face up to it, but I can no more, its done, all done, everyhting nowadays is a remake, based on a book (but done badly), based on a game (but done even worse), based on Japanese films (and done the most horrendous).

*Goes into a corner and cries*

Jinsenken @ May 24th 2009 12:02AM

All Pixar films say hi.

Bagels: Commander in Chief of the lolcat sarcasm alert force. @ May 24th 2009 1:17AM

+1 To Jinsanken

This_Time @ May 24th 2009 1:17AM

Yeah, the film industry has basically reached the point where everything is a remake of something, so nothing is a remake of anything. It's kinda like calling Crysis a Doom clone.

Massmass @ May 24th 2009 2:11AM

Pixar doing something original? Please. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy Pixar movies but they cash in on nostalgia, warm and buttery feelings and tried and true concepts. Toys, Action Heroes, Monsters, Cute Robots, etc. etc. A Bug's Life and maybe two other movies MAY have been more original, but that's hardly their entire portfolio.

t_m @ May 24th 2009 5:26AM

Which movies did living toys, factory working monsters and epic father-son fish bonding adventures before?

The only pixar movie that could be claimed to be unoriginal is The Incredibles, as it has a lot of similarities to Watchmen... but really its a totally different kettle of fish.

Pixar is about the only shining beacon in the sea of hollywood at the moment... and i'm worried disney is gonna disnify them...

Maverick Saturn @ May 24th 2009 8:02AM

I'm exaggerating a bit of course, every now and again something unique comes out, but then......it is copied and copied and copied until its uniqness has been dragged to hell. Much like the blair witch did with the camera, then every movie wanted a camera, cloverfield, diary of the dead and god knows what else.

Loads of remakes, loads of cheezy love films trying to be funny, loads films based on things but done badly, loads of annoying sequels, Terminator 200, Alien vs Godzilla, when will it all end >.< ack!

Bowser Rogozhin: Princess Nyah DF; Abigail Williams Slayer @ May 24th 2009 9:14AM

Do you have any superior ideas? If not, then quit your bitchin. Not everybody wants to sit through 'Tales of Oppressed Palestinian Lesbians' night after night.

j.howlett @ May 24th 2009 9:49AM

there was a movie about toys that came to life, done i think with puppets, that i watched when i was yonger. it was similar to a version of the nutcracker we watched during the holidays. the toys would come to life when no one was around and if they were seen, they would go lifeless never to wake up again. there have also been a movie about monsters from under the bed who had jobs to scare kids and the father and son thing with dead mommy is an old staple

Maverick Saturn @ May 24th 2009 10:36AM

@ Bowser Rogozhin: Princess Nyah DF; Abigail Williams Slayer

Thats the thing, before you slam me, maybe you should take into account what you do half the time, bitch, when you have no better ideas, or at least thats what I see you doing in most of these threads, and unlike you, I do have what I would think to be better ideas, which is why I'm critisizing.

Don't slam me if you are the joystiq bitching king

Bowser Rogozhin: Princess Nyah DF; Abigail Williams Slayer @ May 24th 2009 10:46AM

It's well too hot to be hostile. It's no good for your blood pressure...blud.

Anyway, I jovially ask you to present a couple of ideas and you attempt to assassinate my character? Doesn't seem very becoming. Very Croydonish, I must say.

Maverick Saturn @ May 24th 2009 11:04AM

I'm just presenting you with what I see, you are usually the first to state who looks like a moron or what game lacks what, considering you chose to challenge me, I'm a critic, it's in my nature to critisize, but even I know you can't critisize without an alternative, I wouldn't have expressed my dissatisfaction for unoriginal or uninspiring movies if I didn't have alternative ideas or examples of movies I thought were either original or unoriginal but particualarly impressive for some reason or another.

Besides, I live near Croydon, I can't help it if a bit of it rubs off on me ¬_¬

WREturns @ May 23rd 2009 10:11PM

What the...!? Who the FUCK leaked my fan-fiction screenplay to Joystiq?!?!?!

THE WICKER MAN (BWF) (GT: Dalek Prime) @ May 23rd 2009 10:22PM

I liked the part you wrote (i wanna say wroted to be funny) where you were all like: "and then, driver burned into the parking lot. Hot asphalt, steaming with indignation. She came, frantic, in her wet t-shirt. The princess slapped her wet bosom on the his windshield and began to vigorously wash the coldness and grime away. Driver felt something stir in him. Then the other princess, Zelda spoiled it by pouring out of the shadows with a bullet bill blazing out of her frock."
That shits solid gold.

Ficken @ May 23rd 2009 10:13PM

I think your's got cut off, the version I saw said:

"A car is driven, fast."

ha

Grimcicle @ May 23rd 2009 10:22PM

Timmy Vermicelli is ACTUALLY a character in this film!? The character was a one-off mockery of Tommy Vercetti in DRIV3R.

MystileArmor @ May 24th 2009 7:39AM

I'm not too familiar with Driv3r, but I know Tommy Vercetti is the main character in Vice City.

consaw @ May 23rd 2009 10:20PM

I refuse to believe that the co-writer of Pulp Fiction had a had in the writing of this.

j.howlett @ May 23rd 2009 10:42PM

i smell fanfiction

Autobot @ May 23rd 2009 10:45PM

"He car takes off with BURNING RUBBER"

This is a bad movie already.

Shagittarius @ May 23rd 2009 11:25PM

He turns on his left turn signal and prepares to merge.

Close on: the other driver, hes oblivios, hes singing hanna montanna songs. Hes sweaty and wearing a trucker hat.

Close On: View of the grill, slight zoom out (advertising opportunity) and the cars engine makes accelerating noises.

Back to our driver, he downshifts. sweat is pooring down his head, he can't get ahead of the other driver and the onramp is ending.

Other Driver: Driver moves his wheel back and forth like hes sepentining down the road and takes a big bite of ham sandwhich, some of which falls in his lap. He ducks down to retrieve it not watching the road.

Our driver: He begins honking the horn and swearing, and motioning to the other dirver who now he can't see. He downshifts and floors it narrowly escaping running on to the shoulder.

Our driver has successfully merged!

Maxathon @ May 23rd 2009 11:31PM

WTMUNCHY HAIR?

HyperNexus @ May 24th 2009 12:07AM

If this script's laughable grammar is in any way indicative of the final film's quality, this could end up being a great unintentional comedy.

Anticrawl @ May 24th 2009 12:16AM

The question is, does anyone care?

Shadsy @ May 24th 2009 12:55AM

The last movie I saw was The Boondock Saints. After that, a script like this reads like a Tom Clancy thriller.

Bagels: Commander in Chief of the lolcat sarcasm alert force. @ May 24th 2009 1:20AM

Micheal Bay's "The Dark Knight", anyone?

http://my.spill.com/profiles/blog/show?id=947994%3ABlogPost%3A355506

ArchiGamer @ May 24th 2009 2:19AM

Read it. Printed it. Burned it.

Kyle Nichol @ May 24th 2009 5:06AM

A little Beckham, a little McQueen... I can see why they passed on the script, are there any action/driving films with a metrosexual lead?

matt g @ May 24th 2009 7:40AM

I predict that Jason Statham could be a lead character for this, although he does have transporter.

He fits the little beckham (former model) and McQueen (see: transporter movies, the (remake) of Italian Job, the 2009 Superbowl Audi commercial)...and he also voiced the narration for NFL Films "Truth in 24" (a film about the Audi Racing team competing for the 24 hrs of Le Man with their R10TDI in 2008. I highly recommend the documentary for any racing fan.