Yes, 12-year-old Billy Caruthers, projected winner of the 2036 presidential election has decided to resign from his pending office in order to dodge controversy surrounding his pending extramarital affair. He -- oh, wait. We totally misread that headline. The president of magazine publisher
Future US, Jonathan Simpson-Bint,
is stepping down August 31 in order to start up his own business. Simpson-Bint has been working with the company for 18 years, and oversaw the launch of PSM, IGN.com and DailyRadar.com.
Future is currently looking for Simpson-Bint's replacement -- if you've got experience managing humongous publishing companies, yet find yourself working as a lowly fry cook at your local Carl's Jr., perhaps its time you gained some upward mobility.
{ Jun 18th 2009 at 7:55PM } 
Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)
Mr.Happy @ Jun 18th 2009 8:00PM
wat
ahsayuninew @ Jun 18th 2009 10:24PM
Try...
]
wait for it...
its totally worth it....
Reading the article
Ace Steel @ Jun 18th 2009 8:12PM
Hardee's>Carl's Jr.
seriousam7 @ Jun 18th 2009 8:13PM
Hardee's = Carl's Jr.
at least i think
LaughingTarget @ Jun 18th 2009 8:26PM
Yup, same company, just tiny differences. Like Red vs Green Burrito. At least Hardees now has actual Western Bacon Cheeseburgers, that makes them worthy of me.
SoCoolCurt (PSN: KillaKornbread - XBL: SoCoolCurt) @ Jun 18th 2009 8:29PM
yea i thought they were the same thing too. i'm from Maryland and we have Hardee's here but I'm a Lakers fan (CHAMPIONS!) and when i watch their games on the NBA League Pass, they always show the same commercials but with "Carl's Jr" where "Hardee's" usually is.
MowDownJoe @ Jun 18th 2009 8:43PM
Five Guys > all of those.
MuToiD_MaN @ Jun 18th 2009 9:09PM
There's a Red Burrito!?
My mind? Blown.
Heavytoka @ Jun 18th 2009 9:16PM
@MowDownJoe
+1 to Five Guys Being The Best
ampMOD @ Jun 18th 2009 8:13PM
What the hell am I even reading?!
Hashbrown Hunter (OneGiantCluster.blogspot.com) @ Jun 19th 2009 10:12AM
The headline is a pun. Instead of reading it as "Future US President Calls It Quits" you instead read it as "Future's US President Calls It Quits"
Future is a magazine company. The president of the US division of Future has stepped down.
Get it? It's not funny when you have to explain the joke :/
john paul @ Jun 18th 2009 8:18PM
this article = fail
:P
LaughingTarget @ Jun 18th 2009 8:25PM
Is Bint Simpson Homer's nephew?
MechaGamerX @ Jun 18th 2009 8:27PM
I stopped caring for Future after their "re-imagining" of Nintendo Power...
Azbulldog @ Jun 18th 2009 8:37PM
They did that? Damn.
bongoes @ Jun 18th 2009 8:46PM
It's not that bad, It still looks the same, they've made a few improvements, the new guys aren't bad, they increased the number of advertisements... yeah I don't care for them either.
Azbulldog @ Jun 18th 2009 8:52PM
They took down the Nsider forums and everything that was connected with it, the community, fan art, Camp Hyrule. My first issue was 141 February 2001 and my last was 234 November 2008. Hmph.
Rob @ Jun 18th 2009 9:41PM
Damn, they are a bunch of douches.
CH3BURASHKA @ Jun 18th 2009 8:28PM
I had to reread that first sentence 6 times before I got what you were getting at.
The real news is way less awesome that what it sounds like.
bongoes @ Jun 18th 2009 8:48PM
So ah... who's the future vice-president?
Rob @ Jun 18th 2009 9:30PM
Joe Biden's Head in a Jar, like from Futurama.
Rob @ Jun 18th 2009 9:32PM
Joe Biden 2000, the latest in cyborg technology.
Rob @ Jun 18th 2009 9:36PM
Sorry about the double posts, didn't think the first one went through, damn comment system.
fred @ Jun 19th 2009 8:36AM
forget the comment system, make more future Biden jokes.
Hashbrown Hunter (OneGiantCluster.blogspot.com) @ Jun 19th 2009 10:13AM
The Joe Biden T-1000 Terminator
__smooth__ @ Jun 18th 2009 8:59PM
Okay, fine, you got me! But I'm not cheap!
Tegolin @ Jun 18th 2009 9:48PM
lolwut
Oh!
President of "Future US"
whatever @ Jun 18th 2009 10:43PM
That was pretty funny. I was totally confused at first.
Paviel @ Jun 19th 2009 1:38AM
Me too. Then I was reminded of the "guy with a wooden leg named Smith" joke.
John @ Jun 19th 2009 8:32AM
Is it because print is dead?
John @ Jun 19th 2009 8:32AM
Because print is dead
Snake Robot Podium @ Jun 19th 2009 9:20AM
Hey, you got Onion in my Joystiq.