We have the extreme misfortune of writing this piece whilst still in the dank, viscid clutches of July 5th -- a 24-hour period universally accepted as the worst day ever. There's nothing pleasant about nursing broken ribs obtained during feverish slip n' sliding, nor is there anything worth celebrating in that $300 receipt for the illegal explosives you acquired last night -- yes, they were beautiful, but they were so brief. That money could have been spent on more important things, such as rent, or rib-doctor bills.

On this crummiest of days, it's as important as ever to try and find the silver lining in your life's costly, nauseating rain clouds. Sure, your highly illegal "Bottle Rocket Surprise" maneuver didn't work as well as you'd intended, but now that you don't have any hair left on your arms, you'll be able to swim really fast, like Michael Phelps, who is awesome.

Oh, and we've got Japanese Hardware Sales for you to digest! They may not be as juicy or flavorful as the nine Cheddarwurst you consumed last night, but at least they won't attempt to escape your body during the slimy alien autopsy scene in the middle of your annual viewing of Independence Day.
- DSi: 39,885 579 (1.43%)
- PSP: 26,789 1,095 (3.93%)
- Wii: 21,790 2,404 (12.40%)
- PS3: 11,310 951 (9.18%)
- Xbox 360: 5,766 968 (14.37%)
- DS Lite: 5,595 64 (1.16%)
- PS2: 3,578 192 (5.09%)

[Source: Media Create]

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