Why you shouldn't get your video game news from The Wall Street Journal
by Justin McElroy 
{ Sep 23rd 2009 at 1:00PM }
"Take-Two has a number of strong franchises and a number of wholly owned Internet Protocols. Wholly owned IPs not only carry higher profitability, but also are more valuable to media companies because they could be adapted into movies, TV serials and online destinations."
We'd make a joke here, but there's literally nothing we could say that would be funnier than that quote.
[Thanks Leigh!]
Reader Comments (Page 1 of 3)
Solace @ Sep 23rd 2009 1:02PM
See you guys this is why we need Patcher!
Ashkental @ Sep 23rd 2009 1:06PM
So he can continue to amuse us?
There should be a Pachter force, they'd make some petition to make Pachter appear on every Bonus Round and once a week on every blog, so our weeks could be a lot more funnier
AsherR [Planeteer | Power of The Hoff] @ Sep 23rd 2009 1:29PM
BRILLIANT!
AsherR [Leader of the Pachter Defense Force] [Planeteer | Power of The Hoff] @ Sep 23rd 2009 1:31PM
Pachter Defense Force ASSEMBLE!
Traceur_Ryuk (PSN: Ryuk_shinigami) @ Sep 23rd 2009 1:40PM
Can I join the Pachter defense force? =|
Solace @ Sep 23rd 2009 1:43PM
you should join the Anti-Megan Fox Brigade.
Traceur_Ryuk [Foot Soldier of the Pachter Defense Force] (PSN: Ryuk_shinigami) @ Sep 23rd 2009 1:51PM
But I like Megan Fox... Oh well, I joined the PDF anyways.
PR0F3TA (PSN - PROPHETA) @ Sep 23rd 2009 2:14PM
for the love of joystiq don't do anymore stupid memes... we had some bad ones with Megan Fox and Sweatshops already.
i blame DSG for being so awesome that people want more
AsherR [Leader of the Pachter Defense Force] [Planeteer | Power of The Hoff] @ Sep 23rd 2009 2:14PM
Yes, Traceur, all are welcome in the PDF, so long as you acknowledge the cutting insight of Pachter.
And Solace, that's a tempting offer. :P
I'm personally getting tired of the Megan Fox over saturation. I swear, if I see another ad for Jennifer's Body.... Though she was funny on Conan, well Conan was funny with her.
tyetheczar @ Sep 23rd 2009 2:42PM
This is the one of those reasons why you shouldn't support anything that's owned by the douchebag who owns Fox News and helped make Dragonball: Evolution. Rupert Murdoch, hoggish owner of media monopoly NewsCorp.
http://www.freepress.net/ownership/chart/main
http://www.stopbigmedia.com
AsherR [Leader of the Pachter Defense Force] [Planeteer | Power of The Hoff] @ Sep 23rd 2009 2:20PM
@PR0F3TA: Aww, shucks. Groups are funny anymore? :( I'm always late to the Meme party.
Also, I think in 3 months or so PR0F3TA I'm going to reply to you with the Kanye joke. Yeah, it's already played out now, but I'm going to wait until the time it's so played out that it's fresh again! Like bell bottoms and the Hoff! (Note: I do not endorse bell bottoms in any form or fashion.)
Oh and did you hear about Chuck Norris?...
Courtney @ Sep 23rd 2009 2:38PM
I'm having trouble loading your PDF.
Dartmerc @ Sep 23rd 2009 7:19PM
Yes, tyetheczar, this surely is the realisation of all your fears!
coolforever4537 @ Sep 23rd 2009 1:03PM
The picture I see on the right describes it all.
Shmil @ Sep 23rd 2009 1:04PM
Super mega mecha fail.
Dirk Dorkelson @ Sep 26th 2009 8:32PM
Yeah, although some of this is on the reporter. Anyone writing for a general interest audience ought to know to spell out "IP" on first reference. It's kosher on a video game site to abbreviate it all the time, because we use it all the time, but I don't think I've ever heard anyone outside of the film or game industry loop talk about IP and not mean Internet protocol.
David @ Sep 23rd 2009 1:05PM
"Take-Two has a number of strong franchises and a number of wholly owned Illegitimate Pandas. Wholly owned IPs not only carry higher profitability, but also are more valuable to media companies because they could be adapted into movies, TV serials and online destinations."
Ashkental @ Sep 23rd 2009 1:07PM
They'd be banned from China for doing this to those poor pandas
Captain Planet [Planeteer | Power of Captain Planet] @ Sep 23rd 2009 1:29PM
"Wall Street Journal has a number of strong franchises and a number of wholly owned Idiot Protocols. Wholly owned IPs not only carry higher comedic value, but also are more valuable to Joystiq readers because they could be adapted into hilarious Internet memes and general shenaniganry."
Hashbrown Hunter (OneGiantCluster.blogspot.com) @ Sep 23rd 2009 6:42PM
"Take-Two has a number of strong franchises and a number of wholly owned Insatiable Parakeets. Wholly owned IPs not only carry higher profitability, but also are more valuable to media companies because they could be adapted into movies, TV serials and online destinations."
SecretAgentHam @ Sep 23rd 2009 1:06PM
Wow.
that is all.
FreshJulius @ Sep 23rd 2009 1:51PM
Coming Summer 2010:
12.154.191.10, Part III
Temidien @ Sep 23rd 2009 3:03PM
...........................................________
....................................,.-‘”...................``~.,
.............................,.-”...................................“-.,
.........................,/...............................................”:,
.....................,?......................................................\,
.................../...........................................................,}
................./......................................................,:`^`..}
.............../...................................................,:”........./
..............?.....__.........................................:`.........../
............./__.(.....“~-,_..............................,:`........../
.........../(_....”~,_........“~,_....................,:`........_/
..........{.._$;_......”=,_.......“-,_.......,.-~-,},.~”;/....}
...........((.....*~_.......”=-._......“;,,./`..../”............../
...,,,___.\`~,......“~.,....................`.....}............../
............(....`=-,,.......`........................(......;_,,-”
............/.`~,......`-...............................\....../\
.............\`~.*-,.....................................|,./.....\,__
,,_..........}.>-._\...................................|..............`=~-,
.....`=~-,_\_......`\,.................................\
...................`=~-,,.\,...............................\
................................`:,,...........................`\..............__
.....................................`=-,...................,%`>--==``
........................................_\..........._,-%.......`\
...................................,
BlazeKing @ Sep 23rd 2009 3:45PM
12.154.191.10 resolved to battleshipgalaxiesgame.hasbro.com [United States]
Gotcha!
Fullmetal Salchemist @ Sep 23rd 2009 3:56PM
Fresh, I have the perfect tagline for your game:
"Who says you can never go 127.0.0.1 again?"
sc00by_y00 @ Sep 23rd 2009 6:26PM
to be future proof (ipv6) :
::1
fe00::0
They could also mean:
http, ftp etc ... or they could mean:
they got a whole lot of icmp, data link and network link for yo ass
Mainman @ Sep 23rd 2009 1:07PM
'Punchline' Insurance: It's meant to be Intellectual Property.
I can't help but be reminded of those oft-recited tech support horror stories where people claim their hard drive contains the Internet.
Rob S. @ Sep 23rd 2009 1:24PM
Theirs may not, but mine does. It's also 3x2 feet and powered by the souls of the damned, but perhaps I've said too much.
saregos @ Sep 23rd 2009 2:21PM
Oh, so that's where mine went, Rob? Well, at least it's doing something useful.
Chris D.(PSN: Aggie_CEO | XBL:The Aggie CEO | Steam: Aggie_CEO @ Sep 23rd 2009 1:08PM
#EPICFAIL
Reinard @ Sep 23rd 2009 1:08PM
hahaha
aaaahahahahahah
Traceur_Ryuk (PSN: Ryuk_shinigami) @ Sep 23rd 2009 1:09PM
I own three Internet protocols... I'm thinking about making them into independant movies.
Alton Brown [ XBL: LordToastington, Soon-To-Be-PSN: OrIsItAltonBrown] @ Sep 23rd 2009 1:11PM
What a coincidence. I happen to be Uwe Boll. Shall we make plans over dinner?
Traceur_Ryuk (PSN: Ryuk_shinigami) @ Sep 23rd 2009 1:14PM
Hmm... I'll give you 20 bucks for the rights to the movie. Deal?
David @ Sep 23rd 2009 1:16PM
Uwe Boll doesn't make independent movies.....he's makes multi-million dollar tax write-offs for wealthy German investors.
The Baron @ Sep 23rd 2009 1:17PM
$20 seems a little over-budget for an Uwe Boll movie.
Stevetrop @ Sep 23rd 2009 1:25PM
Uwe is only going to take offer if some game franchise is involved.
Rob S. @ Sep 23rd 2009 1:30PM
"If So Michael Jackson will definately direct it!"
How can he do that? He's dead.
aristokrat @ Sep 23rd 2009 1:49PM
Where did this strange Michael Jackson troll come from? He posts the same joke in every thread. Very confusing.
coil780 @ Sep 23rd 2009 1:09PM
"Grand Theft Auto is a valuable Internet Protocol."
"Rock Band is a valuable Internet Protocol."
The opportunities are endless!
Cooking Mama is a valuable Internet Protocol!
decapitor @ Sep 23rd 2009 1:09PM
This is what happens when you base your research on skimming ONLY the first 2 lines of wikipedia entries.
Traceur_Ryuk (PSN: Ryuk_shinigami) @ Sep 23rd 2009 1:13PM
By reading the first two lines I still don't see how you can mix up intelectual properties and Internet protocols.
drsashamd @ Sep 23rd 2009 11:23PM
@traceur
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/IP
captainprotonx @ Sep 23rd 2009 1:12PM
Mr. Money Bags is hasty to believe in these "Internet Protocols".
Do they pump Oil? Black Gold? I say, I say, Earth's Juice?
*burns a $100 bill to light a cigar*
What's next? Women in the workplace?
Rhamsey @ Sep 23rd 2009 1:25PM
You better be wearing your monocle.
joeybeast @ Sep 23rd 2009 1:12PM
Good thing I've been getting financial advise from Joystiq.
Triscuit @ Sep 23rd 2009 1:26PM
Unfortunately, it also appears that you've been getting spelling "advise" from them too...
rickjamess04 @ Sep 23rd 2009 1:28PM
I know, right? I mean Joystiq is the pinnacle for journalism. What the fuck does the Wall Street Journal know. Fuckin' n00bs need to get with the times and stop getting pwned by the Joystiq team.
Triscuit @ Sep 23rd 2009 1:34PM
*edit
Unfortunately, it also appears that you've been getting spelling "advise" from Kotaku...
The fact that I had to edit my comment about bad editing makes me look all kinds of foolish.
Petebot330 @ Sep 23rd 2009 1:42PM
This shit's like "Shatter Glass" all over again--you stick it to those old-journalism hacks, you young internet upstarts!