No-win scenario: Star Trek Online pre-order bonuses

by Richard Mitchell on Dec 7th 2009 8:00PM

Much like the dreaded Kobayashi Maru, there really is no right answer to the question, "Where should I pre-order Star Trek Online?" In its ongoing mission to make games as hard to purchase as possible, Starfleet has issued different pre-order bonuses to each major American retailer. Want to pilot the Enterprise? You'll have to order from GameStop. Need a pet Tribble? Best Buy. How about a gun that beams projectiles directly to their intended target? Target. That "Liberated Borg" bridge officer you always wanted? Amazon.

And here we thought all we had to do to get the full enjoyment out of our games was buy them. Those days are over, friend. Check out the full list of pre-order bonuses -- and where to find them -- after the break.

GameStop: Exclusive ship: The classic USS Enterprise
Best Buy: Pet Tribble or Targ (based on faction)
Amazon: "Liberated Borg" Bridge Officer with "unique nanotechnology augmentations"
Direct2Drive: Multi-Spatial Personal Shield (regenerates itself and player health)
Wal-mart: Bonus Skill Points (bestows additional skill points)
Target: TR-116 ground weapon (micro-transporter beams projectiles to target, no line of sight required)
Steam: Chromodynamic Armor, improves critical hits and damage of energy weapons

Source

Tags: atari, cryptic, cryptic-studios, pre-order, star-trek, star-trek-online

Reader Comments (101)

As much as I find that picture above hilarious, you guys should probably use a fresh anology.

No, it still works. Especially considering how it seems Gamestop has once again bullied its way into the prime spot by offering the only cool* pre-order bonus.

* lol, Star Trek

Umm...it's pretty obvious who wins.

Original Enterprise >>>>>>>>> Everything Else.

You got that right. Constitution class (pre-refit) FTW.

See, I actually liked the Enterprise from VI (looked more...militaristic). But I'll take any Constitution class ship over the modern stuff.

It's what, the 25th century now? A constitution class ship would get raped by a shuttlecraft.

And tribbles are a meance to be exterminated.

A borg crew member will likely either continually try to screw you over to go back to the borg, or make numerous unsuccessful attempts to integrate into the crew before banging your first officer for no reason.

The TR116 Is clearly the best option.

you're crazy! Seven of Nine would never betray me! Amazon is the only place to buy!

They explain that the Constitution class in the game is designed after the original, but is made with modern technology/

Oh, and the pre-order bonus says you get the Constitution class with BLUE phasers. The Constitution class can be used anyway, but if you pre-order, you get blue phasers.

The original Enterprise is clearly the best bonus. However, I like the refit Enterprise a bit better than the original. Very close, though.

I've always thought the refit Constitution-class was one of the most elegant starship designs ever. It took Matt Jefferies' iconic base and turned everything up to 11. In contrast, I really can't stand the Bussard ramscoops on the new film's Enterprise. They look like toys.

Bussard Ramscoops? You just won the dork award.

I'll agree about the collectors. I prefered the entire warp nacell desing from the refit Enterprise anyway.

I agree, that I would love to go for the original Enterprise. But Gamestop is fail.

I guess I am going to have to live with the chromodynamic armor...whatever the hell that is, because Steam >>>> everything else.

So the way to win is not to play, right?

So close...but you forgot a word.

The 'only' way to win is not to play.

Ha ha you guys are both not nerdy enough. it is "The only winning move is not to play."

Gamestop had me at "Classic Enterprise".

Though if you went with the BB Tribble, wouldn't you endanger yourself and your crew due to their massive reproduction?

Just get it "fixed"

Well, the Tribble would be useful when fighting Klingons, remember.

Can I get Picard as my liberated Borg?

Personally, I think it would be massively entertaining to have Dr. O on my bridge. But that's just me.

It's not against regulations to have a magic man on board.

I'm so sick of pre-order bonuses.

Solution? Never buy the game and forget it ever existed. That's my plan.

Well most of the time it seems like they hand out the pre order bonus like two months later as part of some DLC anyhow so ...... Pre ordering is sorta ...... meh anyhow.

ill second that, this pre-order crap is getting out of hand. why the hell should someone who paid the same get something different than what i bought.

I have to credit them for using canon Trek gadgetry. The TR-116 was actually the lynchpin of a DS9 story from...the seventh season, if I recall right. The one where that cutie Ezri had to solve multiple murders on the station.

Season 7 Ep. 13 Field of Fire. That gun would be pretty amazing in real life.

woah, I actually saw that episode.

...and people say that I'm a troll?

Jesus christ what's with all these wigger posters lately? I feel like I'm back in new york.

This guy has been cloned and imitated so many times I don't know who is who anymore.

I know who it is

http://c2.api.ning.com/files/S2QjNaKW8sOx-LctqTucYXcIP*AWI604j6rhoA-WazHKqkT0l05UwueSrIikglg0LGaOCRf02XEIxMfgJr7l4QXjIKxiy4pl/wigger.jpg

(long link is long!)

So you're a dick?

Well, I actually agree with you there...

tmac, considering your history of posts I wouldn't consider you in any position to insult.

Joystiq really needs to fix these reply glitches.

I know I'm a douche though, and I embrace it.

I know I have opinions that are different than other commenters, and I embrace it.

Fixed.

Oh, that is priceless.

Tmac's comment should be nominated for CotY voting.

I have a question about these pre-order bonuses. If I buy the game afterwards, does this mean I can never access those bonuses, not even as paid DLC?

I'm lucky as a PC gamer that with Mass Effect 2 for instance, I could probably just torrent the pre-order bonus armor and whatnot instead of having to pre-order from evil Gamestop or Amazon and having to choose from the bonus.

Unless someone sells their pre-order code. I've only pre-ordered from Amazon, and they just send it later. You might be able to hack it in, I guess.

"hack it in"

How the hell would you do that? I presume you never played any MMOs?

Pre-order bonuses are almost always only useful for the first 5% of the game anyway. Beyond that they are really only to show how long you've been around.

I hope you aren't 23 years old.

I Dunno some of the pre order bonuses sound a bit game breaking unless they are something other players can pick up later on in the game anyhow, or they become totally useless at later levels. If that's the case might as well go for the enterprise or the tribble.

Otherwise regenerating personal shiled/HP or no line of sight weapon sounds pretty interesting. Not that I'm going to play the game but If I was, I'm just sayin'

Cool, dawg.

Too bad about that lack of comprehension over the purpose of the 'reply' button.

Report and move on.

How cute. This guy and the 'eric' are the exact same account. He's just doing name switches

Wow. So what you do is you purchase from every retailer and then sell your extra copies online, yea.

Can you use more than one bonus on an account?

Well it does say Pre-Order not purchase so in theory you could pre order from all of them then only purchase from one, would need to look into it but last time I was going to do a pre order at gamestop they assured me it was refundable if I changed my mind.

-Sinister Musical Interlude-

That's good question. Any MMO'ers out there that can clarify on this with past experience? Another question, can you see my avatar?

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No-win scenario: Star Trek Online pre-order bonuses

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