They might be a bit rough around the edges, but that doesn't mean that they didn't get the most magazine upsells for the month of December (they did!) or that they aren't capable of re-alphabetizing the used PS2 section six or seven hundred times a day (they are!). Give them a chance, folks. Under the inhuman terror mask and bullet-proof chest padding beats the heart of a human being.
They might be a bit rough around the edges, but that doesn't mean that they didn't get the most magazine upsells for the month of December (they did!) or that they aren't capable of re-alphabetizing the used PS2 section six or seven hundred times a day (they are!). Give them a chance, folks. Under the inhuman terror mask and bullet-proof chest padding beats the heart of a human being.
Reader Comments (48)
Posted: Jan 7th 2010 1:53AM (Unverified) said
That "hot" chick is wearing a stupid pregnant-looking shirt. Goddamn it, rest in peace, my potential boner. Well, she wasn't hot anyway so nevermind.
But really, what the fuck is up with this Salem and Rio stuff? Is it supposed to be entertaining to watch two muscle-bound mercenaries brofist in a video game store that fucks you over? Is that what this game will do? WILL IT FUCK YOU OVER? I'M SO CONFUSED.
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But really, what the fuck is up with this Salem and Rio stuff? Is it supposed to be entertaining to watch two muscle-bound mercenaries brofist in a video game store that fucks you over? Is that what this game will do? WILL IT FUCK YOU OVER? I'M SO CONFUSED.
Posted: Jan 7th 2010 2:39AM Johnnynumber5 is powered by cell said
"That "hot" chick is wearing a stupid pregnant-looking shirt. Goddamn it, rest in peace, my potential boner. Well, she wasn't hot anyway so nevermind."
Cool story bro! ... :rolls eyes:
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Cool story bro! ... :rolls eyes:
Posted: Jan 7th 2010 9:35AM (Unverified) said
Well, they brofisted me and then Gamestop stared at me awkwardly because we all know that it's a virgin with little to no ability in initiating any kind of contact. :(
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Posted: Jan 7th 2010 2:03AM Jawmuncher said
The commercial wasn't that bad however.
The music fucking ruin's it, big time.
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The music fucking ruin's it, big time.
Posted: Jan 7th 2010 7:53PM (Unverified) said
well, it's not exactly like he's getting as much work in the video game industry these days. Duke's gotta make a living somehow...
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Posted: Jan 7th 2010 2:33AM Johnnynumber5 is powered by cell said
They've really done the best commercials / promotional videos for this game that I've ever seen. The compositing is so perfect that it looks real. Damn shame the demo was so terrible because I was hyped after the first game.
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Posted: Jan 7th 2010 3:58AM Premature ejaculation man said
Haven't been able to play the demo. Is it an improement oer the first though? I couldn't really get into it when I rented it.
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Posted: Jan 7th 2010 4:43AM (Unverified) said
The first game was only enjoyable because of the hilarious bromance. This one took out the bromance.
So yeah it's awful.
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So yeah it's awful.
Posted: Jan 7th 2010 8:52AM Vcize said
Dude what are you talking about? The first 30 minutes after we got the demo all we did was screw around with the new bromance and taunt animations.
Plus one of the taunts punches the guy in the head and knocks him on the ground now, so now you can punch teammate in the head and then teabag him when he falls over.
Also, the aiming is really improved, but that's secondary to the ability to teabag taunt.
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Plus one of the taunts punches the guy in the head and knocks him on the ground now, so now you can punch teammate in the head and then teabag him when he falls over.
Also, the aiming is really improved, but that's secondary to the ability to teabag taunt.
Posted: Jan 7th 2010 2:40AM Johnnynumber5 is powered by cell said
I'd say its pure shit based off the demo.
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Posted: Jan 7th 2010 2:43AM PirateEmery said
It's about time a game came out starring two homosexual men. A real landmark in gaming...
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Posted: Jan 7th 2010 2:50AM (Unverified) said
They already have that. It's called Super Marios Brothers.
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Posted: Jan 7th 2010 4:56AM Metalsocks said
I love this series. Why? Because my girlfriend loves it. Therefor I can play without being bitched at "I wanna play Peggle or GTA4"
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Posted: Jan 7th 2010 6:32AM CrabBattle said
I cant stand this "mix" of games/stores (especially gamestop). Sonic doesnt have amazon-branded shoes, nor mario has a sears cap.
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Posted: Jan 7th 2010 7:06AM KillerSlinky said
I enjoyed the commercial for Nevada Ski Deals that ran after this, more than the Game Stop ad.
Ive always wanted to ski...
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Ive always wanted to ski...
Posted: Jan 7th 2010 9:21AM (Unverified) said
Seems like they spent more time on the gfx of this commercial than that of the game...
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Posted: Jan 7th 2010 9:32AM Chris DPSN AggieCEO XBLThe Aggi said
the ad campaign for this has been HILARIOUS!!!
Can't wait til next week!!
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Can't wait til next week!!
Posted: Jan 7th 2010 10:59AM (Unverified) said
this is the most objectionable advertisement that I have ever seen. If anyone ever asks you why there aren't more women involved with the production or consumption of video games, show them this ad. Reasons:
1) Protagonists look and act like rapists - if you were to take these protagonists back ten years and put them in a movie they would clearly be the antagonists in whatever movie they were in in the form of psychotic murderers.
2) Women are treated like willing sex objects - there are at least two instances of this in this one ad.
3) I POOPED AND IT WAS STINKY - seriously? I can't imagine any more juvenile humor than this - and it's not like it's some plot point that pays off in a hilarious way that advances the story (ads can have stories, the really good ones do), it just ends with some Game Stop drone being force to clean it up. If you consider the film Something About Mary, where Cameron D gets jizz in her hair it's a plot point that they build up to (so to speak), which advances her character. Why am I going into such detail about this stupid fucking spot.
4) The "Two", as Gamespot employees treating customers like shit - ok at least this is accurate in that the sales front of the game industry are like the worst aspect of the games industry. The thing that I love about Steam and XBLA so much is that you don't have to interface with these useless human beings in these dank, poorly lit, aesthetically unpleasing nerd caves. Digital distribution is coming and it's going to eliminate any need for Gamespot. One day I'm going to buy an old Gamespot, after they go out of business, with all the shelves and then im going burn it to the ground and piss on the ashes.
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1) Protagonists look and act like rapists - if you were to take these protagonists back ten years and put them in a movie they would clearly be the antagonists in whatever movie they were in in the form of psychotic murderers.
2) Women are treated like willing sex objects - there are at least two instances of this in this one ad.
3) I POOPED AND IT WAS STINKY - seriously? I can't imagine any more juvenile humor than this - and it's not like it's some plot point that pays off in a hilarious way that advances the story (ads can have stories, the really good ones do), it just ends with some Game Stop drone being force to clean it up. If you consider the film Something About Mary, where Cameron D gets jizz in her hair it's a plot point that they build up to (so to speak), which advances her character. Why am I going into such detail about this stupid fucking spot.
4) The "Two", as Gamespot employees treating customers like shit - ok at least this is accurate in that the sales front of the game industry are like the worst aspect of the games industry. The thing that I love about Steam and XBLA so much is that you don't have to interface with these useless human beings in these dank, poorly lit, aesthetically unpleasing nerd caves. Digital distribution is coming and it's going to eliminate any need for Gamespot. One day I'm going to buy an old Gamespot, after they go out of business, with all the shelves and then im going burn it to the ground and piss on the ashes.
Posted: Jan 7th 2010 10:10AM (Unverified) said
You all should be insulted by this preposterous bullshit. THEY THINK YOU ARE STUPID AND THAT THIS WILL GET YOU TO BUY THEIR GAME DESPITE THE TERRIBLE DEMO.
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Posted: Jan 7th 2010 10:14AM Vcize said
Congratulations zazzle, you've done it. You've some how managed to beat out all the other crap and make the worst post in the history of joystiq.
Objectionable against women, because it has a woman act all sexy-like? Yeah, like that's not in just about every ad ever already. Is it also objectionable against men because it makes them out to be big dumb dufuses? Is dufeses even a word?
And the protagonists look like rapists? That's totally objectionable against people with masks. You racist.
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Objectionable against women, because it has a woman act all sexy-like? Yeah, like that's not in just about every ad ever already. Is it also objectionable against men because it makes them out to be big dumb dufuses? Is dufeses even a word?
And the protagonists look like rapists? That's totally objectionable against people with masks. You racist.
Posted: Jan 7th 2010 11:47AM Johnnynumber5 is powered by cell said
"If anyone ever asks you why there aren't more women involved with the production or consumption of video games, show them this ad."
http://www.joystiq.com/2010/01/06/nielsen-survey-says-most-psp-users-are-female-xbox-360-most-pla/
According to its survey statistics, Sony's PSP market in the United States contains a slight majority of female gamers -- 52% of the platform's owners in the region, while 49% of Nintendo Wii owners are female. Nielsen's survey statistics show that, as of 2009, 45% of all active gamers are women.
FAIL FAIL FAIL FAIL FAIL
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http://www.joystiq.com/2010/01/06/nielsen-survey-says-most-psp-users-are-female-xbox-360-most-pla/
According to its survey statistics, Sony's PSP market in the United States contains a slight majority of female gamers -- 52% of the platform's owners in the region, while 49% of Nintendo Wii owners are female. Nielsen's survey statistics show that, as of 2009, 45% of all active gamers are women.
FAIL FAIL FAIL FAIL FAIL
Posted: Jan 7th 2010 10:58AM (Unverified) said
i love the ad's they throw out for this game :)
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Posted: Jan 7th 2010 10:59AM (Unverified) said
Vcize - what race is defined by the fact that they all wear masks? I was always under the impression that race was defined by a set of physical characteristics and not sartorial choices. You fucking dipshit.
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Posted: Jan 7th 2010 4:41PM Katana Master said
That was a great commercial, made me chuckle every now and then xD
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