Your name is Geralt of Rivia and you are a witcher, that means you kill monsters for a living."
Well, GOG's succinct description
of your role in The Witcher
should eliminate any of the misconceptions you may have conjured since the game launched on PC in 2007. You're not a guy who collects or makes witches, you're not playing a smart-mouthed Cher impersonator, and you're certainly not an interior decorator who adjusts the general witchy-ness of Rivia's less desirable estates.
If you want to experience The Witcher
's line of work beyond that summary, you'll have to check GOG on May 10th when the "Enhanced Edition: Director's Cut" becomes available on the download service. The action RPG will cost $4.99 from then until May 24 ($9.99 afterward) and include a glut of bonus items, such as a soundtrack, wallpapers, avatars, a digital artbook and a calendar of topless fantasy women that will absolutely be open one day when your mom walks into the room. If you're looking to use all of that in preparation for The Witcher 2: Assassins of Kings
, you'll be happy to learn that the sequel can import your original save file.
In other monster news -- less slaying of
and more running from
-- GOG has just added the Alone in the Dark
trilogy for $5.99. Those frightening polygonal blobs and creepy camera angles should stir up plenty of nostalgia, enough to last until GOG starts releasing over 25 additional games it claims is already in the process of being optimized and tested for the service.