samwyse

Imagine: Master Chief

It's a cheap shot, I know, but what the heck.

http://img88.imageshack.us/my.php?image=dsdailyimagineow3.jpg

The current issue of Escapist (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/) is all about our favorite handheld, and one of the articles concerns rampant piracy. They point out that no one pirates Guitar Hero, because of the "dongle" required to play the game. Unfortunately, you can't ask everyone to put up with a separate dongle for every game, no matter how much it enhances the play. Still, it points out that any successful anti-piracy measures have to enhance the game for honest people.

Clubhouse Games is the one cartridge I'd want on a desert island. The backgammon game alone is excellent, and there are several games that I keep meaning to learn. (Shake the Bottle, otoh, is a total waste of ROM.) I also like rogue-likes, so Shiren would probably be my second choice.

I'd like to see some of the Wiimote functionality show up in a next-gen DS. More RAM, accelerometers, and a rumble function would all be things that could (with a firmware assist) enhance existing games as well as enable a lot of new games. Bluetooth functionality could not only let you use a cordless stereo headset; imagine a game that used the Wii Fit balance board as an extra input device!

This was one of the first games I bought when I got my DS, and it's the only one I still play. I still can't understand that wacko Japanese card game, but I'll play backgammon for days at a time. I love Phoenix Write, but in terms of hours spent playing, Club House Games has lapped all four Ace Attorney games about a dozen times. In fact, if you divide the price by the re-playability, you'd find that this cartridge is practically free.

I'd like to see a new DS with all the hardware of a Wiimote: more RAM, accelerometers, and a rumble function. I want Bluetooth that works with existing Bluetooth stereo headsets, like the iPhone's. Replace the existing power connector with a USB port and give me an SD slot. I want a video-out port that works with video goggles (http://www.thinkgeek.com/computing/mp3/98d3/); I also want dual 3D graphics hardware to support true stereoscopic output to those goggles. Finally, I want the firmware to include full PDA functionality, so I'll know to stop playing Ace Attorney in time to make it to court.

Any new DS should be somehow usable as a Wii controller. That means an on-board accelerometer at a minimum (the IR camera could be an add-on). 16MB of RAM would also be nice. Change the firmware so that you can suspend your game and switch to a PDA function at any time. Finally, have stereoscopic goggles as an accessory. Even if only one person in a hundred buys it, the PR will be priceless. The Game Boy Color let you play older games and choose a palette; the DS-2 should let you do the same, adding a stereoscopic effect to older games.

Psyduck -- just because I like the name

Mewtwo.

And btw, my eight-year-old kids really want me to win this.