Colon Catastrophe

Well, it hasn't happened yet, but a new ladyfriend is looking very possible!

Jon Chang. Just being able to shriek like him would make my life complete. Plus, if anybody saw a zombie coming wailing like Chang, they would know they were screwed.

Jade Shepard.


I always create my perfect woman in video games, heh.

I'll create the first ever one man digital bar cover band and get me lots of drunk toothless cougars.

I would love to invite Mr. Pyramid Head. If I understand correctly, he has a knife that will cut through even the driest turkey!

I'd pack Grace Park. I think, so long as she stayed on my side, we'd do very well with whatever we had to face.

Holy crap, Snot? Thank you.

Cherry limeade, the greatest drink ever created.

Wingardium Leviosa!

Waluigi, the best Strikers Charged character! Hey, never said it had to be a real person...