scott

The black gives it a slimming effect.

The name is tweetarded.

I think I will be @joystiq for my up-to-date gaming news. Unfollow @BestBuy.

I'm a fan of most fighting games, the DOA games, and even this non-fighting DOA game. It's a relaxing change of pace.

Specifically, the things I like/dislike about the DOA beach games:

BOOBS GOOD - They're pretty as hell. I know, I know, half of you are like "I'm a respectable gamer - big boobs have no place in games!!" Whatever. These cartoon girls are cute - it's why most Disney films are watchable, why most guys get into anime, and why we all love Jessica Rabbit. I've come to peace with it.

BOOBS BAD - I am a little disappointed they didn't change the opposing chameleon-eye-boob-bouncing dynamics from the console version though. Boobs should bounce together, not against each other and in opposite directions.

VOLLEYBALL GOOD - It's easy to start but really mastering the nuances and depth of a difficult end-vacation match isn't as simple as most players can pick up in 6 hours or less of gameplay. How much your partner likes you and how much one of the opposing players like you have an affect. Some characters are better at spiking, some at blocking, some at diving hits. You'd be surprised how nuanced some of the strategies can be after looking up a strategy faq.

VOLLEYBALL BAD - It's too nuanced. So much so that it can feel like there's no depth at all to most casual players, since this seems like a casual game. I admit, it can get monotonous too. And frustrating when you aren't aware of the little things (guiding ball direction, quick sets, diving sets, attack sets, blocking and spiking).

GAMBLING GOOD - Nice change of action. You can learn different players' behaviors, who bluffs more, who plays it safe, et cetera and play against that accordingly.

GAMBLING BAD - No strip poker?!

PICTURES GOOD - What's wrong with pretending to be a model photographer and getting a nice shot?

PICTURES BAD - It gets old fast, but at least this is how you unlock more of the "valentine" poses or whatever they call them.

OTHER STUFF - The longevity and heart of the game is the costume and item collection - something that very few reviewers have time to get a feel for. The real key to which is getting the other players to like you enough that they give you costumes from their own set. In essence, DOA Paradise (or Extreme Beach or Volleyball) is a friendship and collection game. Achieving all the costumes for a single character, much less all of them, could easily take several months to a year of playing (believe me, I tried with the Xbox version). So it's almost impossible, in large part because of boredom, but on the plus side, there's always something left to get when you pick it up again.

So, I like DOA Paradise. Nice relaxing, in-between action game kind of game. Cute cartoon girls too. I don't mind.

I want to like Jay Mohr but this was not his best work. After the first five minutes (stereotypes about Asians, blacks, and females... still?), I actually liked this commentary on gaming. Really don't think the language or f-bombs are a problem though.

I have to agree with Sony on this one. When I got my iPhone a couple years ago, I would never have considered a portable gaming device. I got it to use as an internet/email/phone/camera/plus device. But the games on it are so ... lacking, that I seriously thought about getting a PSP for the first time.

Then the iPad came out, and after reading about it, now I really want a PSP. If only it had a phone function too.

I think Moxxi's endearing qualities are that she loves action-packed violence as much as the players. Plus she's a snappy dresser with a soothing voice.

It looks like something you'd do if you didn't want your kids playing with the wheel when you were out.

The nega-review is a genius stroke of Joystiq especially with all the A+ reviews given to GTA IV. It's nice to see what isn't perfect about this game without reading through 8 pages of the "Why we all must play this game" bandwagon. It must have taken a lot of work sifting all these criticisms from the God's Gift to Gamers reviews out there.

Now that I think about it, the fatality movements for Mortal Kombat aren't very reliable.