Joystiq http://www.joystiq.com Joystiq http://www.blogsmithmedia.com/http://www.joystiq.com/media/feedlogo.gif Joystiq http://www.joystiq.com en-us Copyright 2012 Weblogs, Inc. The contents of this feed are available for non-commercial use only. Blogsmith http://www.blogsmith.com/<![CDATA[N+ developers rail against glut of bad XBLA games]]>http://www.joystiq.com/2008/03/21/n-developers-rail-against-glut-of-bad-xbla-games/http://www.joystiq.com/2008/03/21/n-developers-rail-against-glut-of-bad-xbla-games/http://www.joystiq.com/2008/03/21/n-developers-rail-against-glut-of-bad-xbla-games/#commentsFiled under: , ,

Here at Joystiq, we think Metanet's sadistic platformer N+ is one of the best original games we've seen on Xbox Live Arcade for a while. So maybe it's not too surprising that the game's developers feel the same way. What is surprising is their willingness to diss the entire download service in public.

Talking to Gamasutra, N+ creators Raigan Burns and Mare Sheppard railed against Xbox Live Arcade's bloated catalog of copycat games. "The real problem, I think, is that the same people who are deciding what retail games get greenlit are deciding what Live Arcade games get greenlit," Burns said. "Those decisions that are ruining Live Arcade... it's like, who greenlit Word Puzzle? Who greenlit that hoverboard game that's just shit?" It wasn't always like this, according to Burns. "When we started out ... there were 30 games on Live Arcade. If N was one of them, it would stand out. Now there's like a hundred games, and they're all shit. ... If I was a consumer, I could see not even looking at Live Arcade games anymore if I had downloaded 10 or 20 demos, because at a certain point, you're like, 'Whatever. Maybe there's a good game in here.'"

The full interview contains more thoughts on the Xbox Live certification process, the effect of game demos on buzz, and the stupidity of charging for gamerpics and themes. A word of warning: Microsoft fanboys should take their heart medicine before clicking the read link.

JoystiqN+ developers rail against glut of bad XBLA games originally appeared on Joystiq on Fri, 21 Mar 2008 14:10:00 EST. Please see our terms for use of feeds.

Read | Permalink | Email this | Comments]]>crapDLCdownloadNninjaXBLAxbox live arcadeXbox-360XboxLiveArcadeFri, 21 Mar 2008 14:10:00 EST<![CDATA[Phoenix Games publishing for Wii: be afraid]]>http://www.joystiq.com/2008/02/28/phoenix-games-publishing-for-wii-be-afraid/http://www.joystiq.com/2008/02/28/phoenix-games-publishing-for-wii-be-afraid/http://www.joystiq.com/2008/02/28/phoenix-games-publishing-for-wii-be-afraid/#commentsFiled under: ,

The only possible way to make Data Design Interactive's Wii games look good is to put them next to Phoenix Games' offerings. Luckily for DDI, and unluckily for people without healthy senses of humor who may receive one of these, that is exactly what is happening. Phoenix announced plans to publish fourteen Wii games starting in April. The list includes surefire hits like Rat-a-Box, Lion and the King 3, and Monster Dessert (okay, we actually want to know what that last one is).

Whereas Data Design just makes bad games, Phoenix makes complete garbage, including barely interactive, sub-CDI-level, copyright-infringing animated movies with voice acting from whoever happened to walk by. Phoenix's games are the very definition of "shovelware."

While these games plagued Europe on the PS2, they have yet to make it to the United States, presumably because it's expensive to ship things.

[Via Cubed3]

JoystiqPhoenix Games publishing for Wii: be afraid originally appeared on Joystiq on Thu, 28 Feb 2008 16:00:00 EST. Please see our terms for use of feeds.

Read | Permalink | Email this | Comments]]>crapphoenix-gamesThu, 28 Feb 2008 16:00:00 EST<![CDATA[DDI racing games fall straight to the top of our want list]]>http://www.joystiq.com/2007/12/12/ddi-racing-games-fall-straight-to-the-top-of-our-want-list/http://www.joystiq.com/2007/12/12/ddi-racing-games-fall-straight-to-the-top-of-our-want-list/http://www.joystiq.com/2007/12/12/ddi-racing-games-fall-straight-to-the-top-of-our-want-list/#commentsFiled under: ,


We don't normally cover individual reviews on Wii Fanboy unless we're, you know, writing them. But there aren't enough reviews online of either of these two games to Metareview either one, and we had to make a mention of IGN's reviews of Data Design Interactive's Mini Desktop Racing and Offroad Extreme! Special Edition. These games managed to score 1.2 and 1.0 respectively. That's from IGN, who frequently gets taken to task for their "8-10 review scale."

Check out some quotes from these reviews: Matt C says that "To (Offroad Extreme's) credit, the title features a comprehensive "how to play" tutorial, but unfortunately lacks an accompanying "why to play" one." And Mark Bozon says that "(Mini Desktop Racing's) credits mention no game designer at all though, so that explains a lot," as well as labeling the game "another shovelware title that simply needs to be ignored at all costs."

The Wii has some bad games, but these two from the creators of Ninjabread Man sound like they've raised (lowered?) the bar. We are now driven by an uncontrollable compulsion to play these two games.

[Via NeoGAF]

JoystiqDDI racing games fall straight to the top of our want list originally appeared on Joystiq on Wed, 12 Dec 2007 09:45:00 EST. Please see our terms for use of feeds.

Read | Permalink | Email this | Comments]]>conspiracy-entertainmentcrapdata-design-interactivemini-desktop-racingoffroad-extremeracingWed, 12 Dec 2007 09:45:00 EST<![CDATA[A year of crap: the worst so far]]>http://www.joystiq.com/2007/11/23/a-year-of-crap-the-worst-so-far/http://www.joystiq.com/2007/11/23/a-year-of-crap-the-worst-so-far/http://www.joystiq.com/2007/11/23/a-year-of-crap-the-worst-so-far/#commentsFiled under:


In its first year, the Wii has changed the video game landscape. It's brought people in who never thought they would care about video games. New methods of interacting with onscreen events have been invented. The image of the video game has started swinging away from the nerd-basement stereotype and toward a more family-friendly, even trendy experience.

But the Wii is still a game console, and it can't be completely different from every other console. It's a universal rule that all video game systems must be populated by a bunch of really terrible games, and the Wii has certainly done an admirable job of attracting cheaply-made, ill-conceived, untested, embarrassing garbage. It's really a mark of a system's popularity that so many publishers have come running with their shovels. It's a mark of the Wii's strength as a platform, as well, that it has managed to survive despite the existence of some of these games.

We decided to celebrate this aspect of the Wii by highlighting the five lowest-scoring games on Metacritic's list of reviewed Wii games. The bottom five epitomizes pretty much everything that is terrible about games: hastily thrown-together licensed games, cash-in ports, and games whose ambition far outweighs their budgets. And Chicken Shoot. The worst part? In ten years, every single one of these games will be an extremely rare collectors' item, drawing several times its retail price on eBay, or whatever the future space version of eBay is. And you will want to buy them.

Continue reading A year of crap: the worst so far

JoystiqA year of crap: the worst so far originally appeared on Joystiq on Fri, 23 Nov 2007 16:00:00 EST. Please see our terms for use of feeds.

Permalink | Email this | Comments]]>anniversary-weekchicken-shootchickenshootcrapescapefrombugislandjoystiqfeatureslegend-of-the-dragonlegendofthedragonpool-partytamagotchiFri, 23 Nov 2007 16:00:00 EST<![CDATA[DS Daily: Wasted]]>http://www.joystiq.com/2007/09/20/ds-daily-wasted/http://www.joystiq.com/2007/09/20/ds-daily-wasted/http://www.joystiq.com/2007/09/20/ds-daily-wasted/#commentsFiled under:

There are a lot of great DS games ... but not all of 'em are worth going gaga over. In fact, some are downright bad. Luckily, we've got a lot of games that are good enough to balance out the occasional pile of poo, but we want to hear about your recent bad experiences. Maybe you borrowed or rented something -- or worse, had the misfortune of buying it -- that just wasn't quite up to your expectations. Help everyone else out and share your stories.

JoystiqDS Daily: Wasted originally appeared on Joystiq on Thu, 20 Sep 2007 09:00:00 EST. Please see our terms for use of feeds.

Permalink | Email this | Comments]]>crapThu, 20 Sep 2007 09:00:00 EST<![CDATA[Virtually Overlooked: Trojan]]>http://www.joystiq.com/2007/07/12/virtually-overlooked-trojan/http://www.joystiq.com/2007/07/12/virtually-overlooked-trojan/http://www.joystiq.com/2007/07/12/virtually-overlooked-trojan/#commentsFiled under:

Welcome to our weekly feature, Virtually Overlooked, wherein we talk about games that aren't on the Virtual Console yet, but should be. Call it a retro-speculative.

It's nice to get a little break from the insane howling taking place on all sides. Let's think of today's VO as an oasis from E3; a little sanctuary where we aren't beset by new game announcements and screaming judgments of Nintendo's doom or domination.

After all, what could be so diametrically opposed from E3 than talking about a very old game that's already out, and that we already know we don't have to be excited about?

You won't find any hype here or anywhere else for Capcom's Trojan. That is a promise.


Continue reading Virtually Overlooked: Trojan

JoystiqVirtually Overlooked: Trojan originally appeared on Joystiq on Thu, 12 Jul 2007 19:45:00 EST. Please see our terms for use of feeds.

Permalink | Email this | Comments]]>capcomcrapfightinghigh resolution graphicsHighResolutionGnestrojanvoThu, 12 Jul 2007 19:45:00 EST<![CDATA[Five handheld accessories you should continue to live without]]>http://www.joystiq.com/2007/07/09/five-handheld-accessories-you-should-continue-living-without/http://www.joystiq.com/2007/07/09/five-handheld-accessories-you-should-continue-living-without/http://www.joystiq.com/2007/07/09/five-handheld-accessories-you-should-continue-living-without/#commentsFiled under:


Portable game systems are completely self-contained. Unlike home systems, which require a TV, multiple outlets, and a separate controller unit, handhelds contain everything you need to play games, built right in to the unit. They are self-reliant. They are also-- and this goes without saying-- portable. They're designed to be small so you can carry them around.

Why, then, do jackasses feel the need to make accessories for handhelds? Accessories needlessly add bulk to Game Boys, effectively exiling them from casual pocket-drops. Here are five of the most pointless things you could ever graft onto a handheld system. We're giving a lot of attention to the Game Boy Color, as it turned out to be a focal point for idiotic doodads. Hopefully, these companies are still tired from their furious crap-assembling, and will largely pass over the DS.

Continue reading Five handheld accessories you should continue to live without

JoystiqFive handheld accessories you should continue to live without originally appeared on Joystiq on Mon, 09 Jul 2007 18:16:00 EST. Please see our terms for use of feeds.

Permalink | Email this | Comments]]>accessoriesbeltbelt buckleBeltBucklebucklecrapdanceddrfeaturesgbagbchandheldcraphip clipHipClipizekrevolutionrocksewingsewing machineSewingMachineshockshock n rocksingersolarsolar pakSolarPakMon, 09 Jul 2007 18:16:00 EST<![CDATA[Add cheap nerf crap to your Wii remote]]>http://www.joystiq.com/2007/02/14/add-cheap-nerf-crap-to-your-wii-remote/http://www.joystiq.com/2007/02/14/add-cheap-nerf-crap-to-your-wii-remote/http://www.joystiq.com/2007/02/14/add-cheap-nerf-crap-to-your-wii-remote/#commentsFiled under: , ,

Apparently the powers-that-be at Nerf feel that the existence of one set of cheap attachments to make your Wii remote look like various sports equipment just isn't enough. Sure, Nerf's set is made of their trademark squishy foam, meaning there's less chance of knocking out your little brother's teeth when swinging that mini-tennis racquet. But we have to reiterate our bafflement at why anyone would want these in the first place.

It's not like attaching these things to your remote affects the way it feels to play Wii Sports -- we doubt anyone is going to mistake swinging these flimsy faux foam things to using their real equivalents. The only real function here is to make you look like a bigger doofus while you're playing. What's more, the attachments look like they actually block the IR sensor on your remote, meaning you'll have to take it off every time you want to navigate a Wii Sports menu. Stop the fun, I want to get off!

[Via Engadget]

JoystiqAdd cheap nerf crap to your Wii remote originally appeared on Joystiq on Wed, 14 Feb 2007 11:35:00 EST. Please see our terms for use of feeds.

Read | Permalink | Email this | Comments]]>attachmentscrapnerfWiiwii sportsWiiSportsWed, 14 Feb 2007 11:35:00 EST<![CDATA[Hilarious list of the worst PSP games so far]]>http://www.joystiq.com/2007/01/13/hilarious-list-of-the-worst-psp-games-so-far/http://www.joystiq.com/2007/01/13/hilarious-list-of-the-worst-psp-games-so-far/http://www.joystiq.com/2007/01/13/hilarious-list-of-the-worst-psp-games-so-far/#commentsFiled under:

As with any system's library of games, the PSP has its share of real stinkers. Pocket Gamer managed to relive the pain and construct a hilarious list of the ten worst games on the PSP. How many of these gems do you own?
  • Street Riders
  • Talkman - "It's as if the Walkman debuted as a fridge-sized ghettoblaster that randomly played tunes you didn't want to hear."
  • The Sims 2: Pets
  • Gangs of London
  • Peter Jackson's King Kong: The Official Game of the Movie
  • Taito Legends: Power Up
  • Marvel Nemesis: Rise of the Imperfects
  • Astonishia Story
  • Dave Mirra BMX Challenge
  • KaZook - "Crap name, crap game. KAZooK is, allegedly, a party game. We can't really imagine any party that KAZooK would enliven, save a gathering of the Communist Party of China, and only because it might provoke fisticuffs about the People's Republic sliding into Western decadence. Because if KAZooK is fun, comrades, then joylessly burning books in slate grey jumpsuits would be the ultimate high. Avoid at all costs."

JoystiqHilarious list of the worst PSP games so far originally appeared on Joystiq on Sat, 13 Jan 2007 11:00:00 EST. Please see our terms for use of feeds.

Read | Permalink | Email this | Comments]]>badcrapkazookpocket gamerPocketGamerworstworst gamesWorstGamesSat, 13 Jan 2007 11:00:00 EST<![CDATA[Astrologer predicts the future of the Wii]]>http://www.joystiq.com/2007/01/04/astrologer-predicts-the-future-of-the-wii/http://www.joystiq.com/2007/01/04/astrologer-predicts-the-future-of-the-wii/http://www.joystiq.com/2007/01/04/astrologer-predicts-the-future-of-the-wii/#commentsFiled under:

Crap. Crapcrapcrap.And then Elvis came and denounced the horoscopes, and then Sony made a good PR move. No, folks, astrology is total crap, but that didn't stop some hotshot from making an entertaining article using lots of silly-sounding terms like "synastry" and "radix". Who's destined to come out on top?

As it turns out, Sony has its celestial bodies in order for the coming year. The 360 is decent, but the worst? My goodness, it's the Nintendo Wii. Apparently, the Wii's residence within Scorpio denotes permanence. This clashes with their "active" gaming philosophy, thus creating an unfavorable situation for the company in the future.

The PS3, looking hotter than the Wii? Now we know astrology is fake.

[via Joystiq]

JoystiqAstrologer predicts the future of the Wii originally appeared on Joystiq on Thu, 04 Jan 2007 08:00:00 EST. Please see our terms for use of feeds.

Read | Permalink | Email this | Comments]]>360ActiveAstrologyCrapFakeHoroscopePS3ScorpioXboxThu, 04 Jan 2007 08:00:00 EST