We're so mad at ourselves for in some small way perpetuating the sphere of influence of Kim Kardashian, who, as Joel McHale correctly points out, is famous for having a big ass and a sex tape. But news is slow this morning, OK? It was either this or another cake shaped like the Companion Cube.

That said, here's EA Sports chief Peter Moore beating up on Kim Kardashian in Facebreaker, a fight you can re-enact at home with just a few free minutes and a semi-truck full of self-loathing. Who wins this historic clash of titans? All we can say for sure is not us, dear reader. Not us.

Electronic Arts has today released the one-two punch of both Madden 09 and Facebreaker demos on Xbox Live [update: and PlayStation Network] (via Major Nelson). Both downloads are approximately 1 GB apiece, and Facebreaker has the added benefit of a character creation feature that lets you transfer your created fighters to the full game. PlayStation 3 owners can expect the Madden 09 demo today, but face breaking will have to wait until August 7.

[Update: A Sony rep called to let us know that both demos will be coming to PSN today, as well]

We're not exactly sure why anyone would want to punch EA Sports' charismatic figurehead, Peter Moore -- especially in his cherubesque face. Still, we guess it's nice to have that opportunity available, should you someday develop a strong Moore aversion. However, traveling to Pete's home and mercilessly pummeling him would likely be a costly and illegal venture -- luckily, EA's upcoming Facebreaker will reportedly allow you to perform a beatdown upon a digital representation of Moore's visage, free of travel expenses and assault charges.

At their E3 booth, Electronic Arts revealed that Moore's face had been scanned and entered into the game using the title's boxer creation feature. EA mentioned to gaming blog ButtonMasher that Moore's face will make it into the final retail version of Facebreaker, perhaps as an unlockable character. We'll politely abstain from exercising our pugilistic prowess on the exec, though admittedly, we wouldn't mind seeing how the tattooed spokesman held up in the ring.

Living room pugilists can finally circle a date on their calender, provided they can hold a pen while wearing gloves, as GameSpot reports that Electronic Arts plans to ship its arcadey boxing title FaceBreaker for the Xbox 360, PlayStation 3, and Wii on September 5.

As the first title to emerge from EA's newly launched Freestyle brand, the game promises over-the-top ringside heroics. FaceBreaker is a game that continues to remain on our radar as one of our more anticipated games at next month's E3, though honestly we're conflicted if this has more to do with the title's tooned-out gameplay or simply the opportunity to uppercut Peter Moore.

Whether you're in it for the pugilistic spectacle or gratuitous undead hostility, we think there are a few good reasons to catch this Friday's episode of GameTrailers TV on Spike. Not only will we see the character creation mode in EA's cartoonish boxing game, Facebreaker, we'll actually get to see show host Geoff Keighley and EA's Peter Moore break each other's faces. In the game.

If you prefer your violence to be dispensed with the pull of a finger (and not the swing of a fist), the episode will also feature new gameplay footage of Capcom's controversial Resident Evil 5. Add a trailer for world-warping shooter Fracture and in-game footage of Golden Axe: Beast Rider, and you have yourself a decent bit of entertainment. You'll find a trailer for the episode, which airs on Friday, May 30th, at 1AM ET/PT, after the break.

Although the Facebreaker character trailers aren't half as amusing as the Team Fortress 2 portraits, we do have hope for the game itself. It would be nice if there was a now-gen "casual" boxing game that rekindled that fun we had while playing Punch-Out back in the '80s.

The latest Facebraker profile (above) is of Steve, your typical fat nerd cliché. We've also placed the video for Romeo after the break. With a September release as part of EA Sports' new Freestyle brand, we're looking forward to getting some hands-on time with Facebreaker at E3. Hopefully the gameplay will enhance the fun and diminish the creepiness we feel in these trailers.

We've been entranced with EA's Facebreaker since they announced it a little over a week ago. With its lighthearted attitude and Fight Night Round 3 meets Team Fortress 2 visuals, we can't help but hearken back to long summer nights spent playing Ready 2 Rumble Boxing on the Dreamcast. However, we shouldn't get our hopes up without knowing anything about the gameplay, which, unfortunately, this "world premier" from GameTrailers doesn't really shed much light on. I guess we'll have to wait until the game is fully detailed in the March issue of EGM before we'll know if we can ever relive our Days of Afro Thunder.

Are you Ready 2 Rumble? "No," says EA's newly announced boxing game, Facebreaker. "But I do feature real-time facial deformation and a lighthearted approach to pugilistic pummeling! So really, I'm more like a Fight Night cel-out." According to the folks at 1UP, Facebreaker is being developed by EA Canada for release on the Xbox 360, PlayStation 3 and Wii. Says EA's Peter Moore: "Arcade boxing takes me back to my roots in this industry, and this game signals our shift to adding more approachable fun to our product lineup."

Those approaching the fun will find an inevitably "colorful" cast of playable caricatures to choose from, including "Latin lover" Romeo and "an oversized Russian demolitions expert" called Molotov. If you'd prefer to have your own face broken, you can either integrate a personal photo via Game Face technology or simply wear your Tingle costume when buying the game from the store.

More Facebreaker details can be found in the March 2008 issue of EGM.