Joystiq http://www.joystiq.com Joystiq http://www.blogsmithmedia.com/http://www.joystiq.com/media/feedlogo.gif Joystiq http://www.joystiq.com en-us Copyright 2013 Weblogs, Inc. The contents of this feed are available for non-commercial use only. Blogsmith http://www.blogsmith.com/<![CDATA[Video game anagrams bring joy to our hearts]]>http://www.joystiq.com/2007/11/18/video-game-anagrams-bring-joy-to-our-hearts/http://www.joystiq.com/2007/11/18/video-game-anagrams-bring-joy-to-our-hearts/http://www.joystiq.com/2007/11/18/video-game-anagrams-bring-joy-to-our-hearts/#commentsFiled under:

If you missed the last edition of Something Awful's video game anagrams, you missed the desecration of some of our favorite video games, such as Super Metroid (More Turd Pies) and Grim Fandango (Gonad Farming), accompanied by some spectacularly Photoshopped box art. Last week, SA posted chapter two of Anagrammed Video Games -- and it does not disappoint.

From the quazi-NSFW Secret of My Naked Loins (Secret of Monkey Island) to Bowser Penis Armour (New Super Mario Bros.) we can guarantee that this will be the hardest you will laugh today, possibly all week. Now, if you'll kindly excuse us, we're going to go finish our game of Abortionist Sea King.

JoystiqVideo game anagrams bring joy to our hearts originally appeared on Joystiq on Sun, 18 Nov 2007 17:45:00 EST. Please see our terms for use of feeds.

Read | Permalink | Email this | Comments]]>AnagramsPhotoshopSomethingAwfulSun, 18 Nov 2007 17:45:00 EST<![CDATA[The hilarity of diveo mage anagrams]]>http://www.joystiq.com/2006/12/15/the-hilarity-of-diveo-mage-anagrams/http://www.joystiq.com/2006/12/15/the-hilarity-of-diveo-mage-anagrams/http://www.joystiq.com/2006/12/15/the-hilarity-of-diveo-mage-anagrams/#commentsFiled under:

Diveo mage, of course, being a rather pathetic anagram of "video game." Admittedly, we're not very good at this. Rather, head over to Something Awful's Photoshop Phriday for a collection of games that could only come about after some serious letter shuffling and, in many cases, heavy drug abuse.

We won't spoil it for you, but rest assured that Tragic Mahjong Copter 3 is a truly excellent game.

( Ahoy Hot Dropship ... p? We really are rubbish at this.)

JoystiqThe hilarity of diveo mage anagrams originally appeared on Joystiq on Fri, 15 Dec 2006 16:40:00 EST. Please see our terms for use of feeds.

Read | Permalink | Email this | Comments]]>AnagramshumorPhotoshopSomething AwfulSomethingAwfulVideo game humorVideoGameHumorFri, 15 Dec 2006 16:40:00 EST<![CDATA[All I want from Sony is better advertising]]>http://www.joystiq.com/2006/12/11/all-i-want-from-sony-is-better-advertising/http://www.joystiq.com/2006/12/11/all-i-want-from-sony-is-better-advertising/http://www.joystiq.com/2006/12/11/all-i-want-from-sony-is-better-advertising/#commentsFiled under: , ,

The Internet is filled with tons of awful, awful things. And the people of Something Awful make their living looking for the Internet's worst. They discovered a Sony-owned and operated blog called "all i want for xmas is a psp." While many PSP enthusiasts will agree with an idea like that, the blog is clearly corporate. Watch this video, found on the site, which features a suspiciously old looking white "teen" that performs a video so bad, it's not even funny. Do you think this kind of advertising would work... on anybody?

[Via Joystiq]

JoystiqAll I want from Sony is better advertising originally appeared on Joystiq on Mon, 11 Dec 2006 21:45:00 EST. Please see our terms for use of feeds.

Read | Permalink | Email this | Comments]]>adadvertisingblogchristmasmarketingpspsomething awfulSomethingAwfulsonyxmasMon, 11 Dec 2006 21:45:00 EST<![CDATA[Uwe Boll does something awful to another critic]]>http://www.joystiq.com/2006/09/25/uwe-boll-does-something-awful-to-another-critic/http://www.joystiq.com/2006/09/25/uwe-boll-does-something-awful-to-another-critic/http://www.joystiq.com/2006/09/25/uwe-boll-does-something-awful-to-another-critic/#commentsFiled under: , ,

Anti-filmmaker Uwe Boll has beaten another one of his critics completely senseless -- and this time it was in a boxing ring, not a darkened cinema. Richard "Lowtax" Kyanka of Something Awful infamy was the second to fall to the raging Boll's flying fists in a PR-driven series of boxing matches. Like any dignified artist, Boll vowed to silence critics by punching them in the face, proving once and for all that ... well, we're not sure what exactly this proves. We know he's a good boxer, at least.

In a video interview after the match, Kyanka amusingly points out that he now detests Uwe Boll not as a movie misdirector, but as a human being. According to the pummeled pundit, Boll offered to give his victims training beforehand and promised that his punches would be just for show. Quite apparently, that was not the case (video embedded after the break). Regardless, it now becomes clear that critics played right into Boll's gloved ham-hands. The selected participants arguably never stood a chance, something the video game violator well aware of in his struggle for Pyrrhic victory. Punching out a critic does not make his films any less craptacular and the whole fiasco has made him look like a fight-makes-right psychopath.

1UP contributor, Albert Art, snapped some pictures at the event and even conducted a brief interview with Boll. When asked why he continues to make video game films, Boll responds with an enlightening, "I keep doing video game based movies because look why not, all the comic-book get made into movies, even comics that sold 2000 copies there are movies out from it, why like big famous videos games shouldn't turn into movies." That about says it all.

[Thanks, albertart and VGM!]

Read - Something Awful's forum responds
Read - Albert Art's event coverage and interview
Watch - Video interview with Richard "Lowtax" Kyanka after the match
Watch - Boll's previous boxing match

Continue reading Uwe Boll does something awful to another critic

JoystiqUwe Boll does something awful to another critic originally appeared on Joystiq on Mon, 25 Sep 2006 21:55:00 EST. Please see our terms for use of feeds.

Permalink | Email this | Comments]]>Alone in the DarkAloneInTheDarkboxingEd WoodEdWoodHouse of the DeadHouseOfTheDeadLowtaxSomething AwfulSomethingAwfulUwe BollUweBollMon, 25 Sep 2006 21:55:00 EST<![CDATA[Awful CD-i Zelda games get remixed]]>http://www.joystiq.com/2006/09/09/awful-cd-i-zelda-games-get-remixed/http://www.joystiq.com/2006/09/09/awful-cd-i-zelda-games-get-remixed/http://www.joystiq.com/2006/09/09/awful-cd-i-zelda-games-get-remixed/#commentsFiled under: , ,

While checking out Something Awful's recent, videogame-themed Photoshop Phriday contest, we couldn't help but notice a link to the site's latest Flash Tub feature, which actually manages to make something good out of the eminently forgettable CD-i Zelda games. Apparently, some SA forum members took audio clips from the games' hilariously bad dialogue and remixed them into some maddeningly catchy techno songs. They even went so far as to create a so-bad-its-good Flash animation for one of the songs, which has a hook that will have you mumbling "I can't wait to bomb some dodongos" all weekend.

Click the read link to view the video and download MP3s of some of the remixes, or continue reading for some hilarious YouTube video of the source material.

Continue reading Awful CD-i Zelda games get remixed

JoystiqAwful CD-i Zelda games get remixed originally appeared on Joystiq on Sat, 09 Sep 2006 14:45:00 EST. Please see our terms for use of feeds.

Read | Permalink | Email this | Comments]]>flashNintendoSomethingAwfulZeldaSat, 09 Sep 2006 14:45:00 EST<![CDATA[When gaming meets and eats gourmet]]>http://www.joystiq.com/2006/09/08/when-gaming-meets-and-eats-gourmet/http://www.joystiq.com/2006/09/08/when-gaming-meets-and-eats-gourmet/http://www.joystiq.com/2006/09/08/when-gaming-meets-and-eats-gourmet/#commentsFiled under:

This week's Photoshop Phriday over at Something Awful once again relates to the wonderful world of video games, tasking fervent photochoppers to take their slicing and splicing skills into the kitchen. The cataclysmic combination of gaming and gourmet yields some absolutely ingenious (even delicious) results and should easily satiate your appetite for a good laugh. From Metal Gear Salads and organized crime omelettes to the frightening discovery of an obtuse vending machine in one of the ages of Myst, the selection is well worth sampling.

[Image by Overbite. Thanks Lupos.]

JoystiqWhen gaming meets and eats gourmet originally appeared on Joystiq on Fri, 08 Sep 2006 16:25:00 EST. Please see our terms for use of feeds.

Read | Permalink | Email this | Comments]]>foodgourmethumorPhotoshopsnackSomethingAwfulFri, 08 Sep 2006 16:25:00 EST<![CDATA['Postal' creator bugged by Boll's boxing stint]]>http://www.joystiq.com/2006/07/12/postal-creator-bugged-by-bolls-boxing-stint/http://www.joystiq.com/2006/07/12/postal-creator-bugged-by-bolls-boxing-stint/http://www.joystiq.com/2006/07/12/postal-creator-bugged-by-bolls-boxing-stint/#commentsFiled under: ,

A month ago, Uwe Boll put up a call to critics to "put up or shut up!" The plan was to have the ill-reputed game director fly the brave souls who "put up" to Vancouver to enter a boxing ring with him (so far, we know of one critic who took the call). The matches will be filmed, shown on the internet, and included in the upcoming game-to-film adaptation Postal.

But Uwe Boll forgot to inform Postal creator Running With Scissors. In their latest newsletter, the company had this to say:

Oh yeah, when asked if he had any comment to make on Uwe's latest PR brainstorm, Vince Desi had his head buried in his hands, muttering only: "I didn't know he was going to do this. He didn't tell me."

The infamous developer does not sound too pleased. But in an e-mail exchange with 1UP, Boll conveys that "all is good" and that he has followed their notes for the treatment. We've got plenty of time to speculate, though: Postal will not start filming until work finishes up on the Dungeon Siege adaptation and a non-game film entitled Seed.

[via 1UP]

Joystiq'Postal' creator bugged by Boll's boxing stint originally appeared on Joystiq on Wed, 12 Jul 2006 15:25:00 EST. Please see our terms for use of feeds.

Read | Permalink | Email this | Comments]]>a dungeon siege taleADungeonSiegeTalealone in the darkAloneInTheDarkin the name of the kingInTheNameOfTheKingsomething awfulSomethingAwfulWed, 12 Jul 2006 15:25:00 EST<![CDATA[Boll adds Something Awful to punchout list]]>http://www.joystiq.com/2006/06/20/boll-adds-something-awful-to-punchout-list/http://www.joystiq.com/2006/06/20/boll-adds-something-awful-to-punchout-list/http://www.joystiq.com/2006/06/20/boll-adds-something-awful-to-punchout-list/#commentsFiled under:

The man every gamer loves to hate has accepted an application to knock out (or get knocked out by) one of his many critics: Something Awful's Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka. Like a man of his word, Uwe Boll will not back down from those who seek to knock him from his throne of cinema la crap.

So, unrelenting in their constant Boll-bashing, Something Awful is ready to step up to the plate and take one for the team: "I sent Mr. Boll an email, asking him if his offer still stood. Would he still fly me up to participate in one of his unintentionally horrific non-horror films, this time with the lure of physically kicking the snot out of me on film? Well folks, I'm proud to say the answer was 'yes.'"

I wonder if Boll truly knew what he was getting into when he opened his big mouth. Perhaps he wouldn't be as hated around the Internets if he wasn't so outspoken about everything. Mr. Boll, please do us all a favor, shut your trap and try your hardest not to make movies that make us feel abused and insulted.

[Via Destructoid]

JoystiqBoll adds Something Awful to punchout list originally appeared on Joystiq on Tue, 20 Jun 2006 12:28:00 EST. Please see our terms for use of feeds.

Read | Permalink | Email this | Comments]]>Something AwfulSomethingAwfulUwe BollUweBollTue, 20 Jun 2006 12:28:00 EST<![CDATA[SA's Photoshop Phriday: Grandma doesn't get video games]]>http://www.joystiq.com/2006/05/28/sas-photoshop-phriday-grandma-doesnt-get-video-games/http://www.joystiq.com/2006/05/28/sas-photoshop-phriday-grandma-doesnt-get-video-games/http://www.joystiq.com/2006/05/28/sas-photoshop-phriday-grandma-doesnt-get-video-games/#commentsFiled under:


Most Grandmas don't get video games. One of mine watched, with vulgar curiosity, as I scaled skyscrapers and snatched civilians in the craptacular Rampage. The other wrapped her arthritic claws around a Gameboy and spent hours -- hours -- playing Bugs Bunny's Crazy Castle.

But the reality is that most Grandmas fall into the former camp, and so it is that Something Awful's latest Photoshop Phriday honors these geriatric non-gamers. My favorite: Make Sure It's Two Person: So Your Sister Can Play Too. That one's a classic.

See also:
SA's Photoshop Phriday: honest game titles
Gallery of Photoshopped Mega Man powers

JoystiqSA's Photoshop Phriday: Grandma doesn't get video games originally appeared on Joystiq on Sun, 28 May 2006 12:00:00 EST. Please see our terms for use of feeds.

Read | Permalink | Email this | Comments]]>Metal Gear SolidMetalGearSolidParodyPhotoshop PhridayPhotoshopPhridaySomething AwfulSomethingAwfulSpoofSun, 28 May 2006 12:00:00 EST<![CDATA[Something Awful picks worst five game reviews]]>http://www.joystiq.com/2006/01/03/something-awful-picks-worst-5-game-reviews/http://www.joystiq.com/2006/01/03/something-awful-picks-worst-5-game-reviews/http://www.joystiq.com/2006/01/03/something-awful-picks-worst-5-game-reviews/#commentsFiled under:

According to Something Awful, 2005 was not a good year for gaming journalism. In fact, they reckon it was a terrible year, and they've picked the five worst gaming articles to exemplify just how abysmal game journalism has become. Not limiting themselves to 2005, the two worst articles in their lineup are both by the same author and neither is actually from 2005; in Something Awful's words, the reviews are so "horrible that they have transcended the limitations of linear time".

Among the lineup is Kieron Gillen, who's responded to the article on his own site. The traits identified by Something Awful that make these particular reviews so bad include, but are not limited to: rampant fanboyism, an awful sense of humour, pretentiousness, spending much of the review not talking about the actual game, spending the entire review failing to describe the game, and being Tim Rogers. A useful checklist of things to avoid when reviewing games.

[Thanks, anonymous]

JoystiqSomething Awful picks worst five game reviews originally appeared on Joystiq on Tue, 03 Jan 2006 12:30:00 EST. Please see our terms for use of feeds.

Read | Permalink | Email this | Comments]]>reviewSomething AwfulSomethingAwfulvideo gamesVideoGamesTue, 03 Jan 2006 12:30:00 EST