You know that feeling when you're done with your local community theater troupe, but they just keep luring you back, promising that this year you'll play Henry Higgins, or complain that they simply don't have a believable Magical Mister Mistoffelees in the whole company and they don't know what they'll do without you? That's Hideo Kojima and Metal Gear Solid, and you gotta feel for the poor guy.

He so badly wants to be done with the series, he recently told 1UP: "I have three concepts for MGS5 already. What would be ideal for me with MGS5, though, is that we don't do those. If the team picks one of those concepts, I have to get involved again, which I don't want to do."

Could someone please come up with an insane enough plot for MGS5 so Kojima can hurry up and make us another Snatcher game? Who's up to the challenge? Is Ted Kaczynski still working?

Hideo Kojima wishes that the inquiries about a Metal Gear Solid 4 port for Xbox 360 would cease. The man who the La-li-lu-le-lo answer to tells Eurogamer he longs for the day that he stops being asked the notorious question during every interview and public appearance. Ironically, Eurogamer goes ahead and asks him about the possibility of an Xbox 360 port.

Kojima reiterates for the umpteenth time that MGS4 was optimized for the PS3 and a port may not be possible. He expresses, in what we're taking as a moment of frustration and spite, that he feels MGS4 should be on PC just so people stop focusing on consoles and start asking him more questions about the game itself.

Having celebrated his 45th birthday on Sunday (happy birthday!), Metal Gear series creator Hideo Kojima has again spoken on the trickiness of leaving the series despite his strong desire to get on with new ventures.

Speaking with Kikizo, Kojima likens his on-again, off-again relationship with the series' director's chair to that of famed Japanese anime director Hayao Miyazaki. "It's like when [he] says he is not going to do more [movies], and then always ends up doing [them]. I think I am kind of in a similar situation," said Kojima, adding, "I have ideas other than Metal Gear, and I want to go on to make other new games, but for political, business or technology reasons, there is always a time when I have to return."

Don't take that to mean "as director," though. "I would like to pass on the Metal Gear series to younger staff members, and then go on to produce the title, and not be so attached to it," he confided. Given his involvement as co-writer of MGS3 and co-writer / co-director of MGS4, Shuyo Murata – director of Zone of the Enders: The 2nd Runner – is currently tipped as Kojima's pick to take the reins of MGS5.

As our stack of thick, leather bound binders filled from end to end with valuable Pokémon cards will attest, we're suckers for collectible card games. You could probably also tell from our proclivity to creep around the local Wal-Mart with a black bandana crudely wrapped around our greasy mullets that we're also diehard fans of stealth action. As such, it would seem logical to assume we're big supporters of the PSP-exclusive Metal Gear Acid titles -- unfortunately, one look at our barren ludological library will show that we possess a powerful, unnatural fear of video game packaging.

Thankfully, our hopes for a downloadable version of the Acid titles were lifted somewhat by a brief blurb from series creator Hideo Kojima at Leipzig yesterday. Kojima explained that while there's currently no plans concerning the two titles, it's "possible" that the card battlers could be uploaded onto PSN. We certainly would have preferred a more substantial tease from the Metal Gear maven, a "probable" or "likely", perhaps -- but we suppose beggars can't be choosers.

A brief interview with Hideo Kojima at Variety isn't so much full of megatons – he hasn't read much Haruki Murakami but he does enjoy Phillip Dick and Kurt Vonnegut – as it is with some insights into the supposed "end" of his Metal Gear Solid series.

Kojima shares some of his thought process on the creation of "Old Snake" – "I made him this way because of the unique characteristics of the game medium ... he represents the players themselves because of the interactive nature of games" – as well as teasing what we may be able to expect from "a new Snake." Kojima says, "If there ever were to be a new Snake (might have a different name), he will be a Snake for a new era." No, we're not sure what that means either, but it gives us great satisfaction in knowing that Kojima probably does.

We were starting to think that the new camo patterns available for download via Metal Gear Solid 4's "Extras" screen were going to be fairly mundane. Silly us! This is Hideo Kojima we're talking about here, and behind his stoic stare the guy has quite the sense of humor.

Case in point: the two new OctoCamo patterns available today. Called "Laughing Camo" and "Raging Camo," they cover Snake in text when equipped (which doesn't exactly sound like the best thing for, you know, stealth gameplay). These patterns aren't about hiding from enemies, though ... their effects are actually seen when you get near them. They cause PMC soldiers and other foes to break out into laughter and howling on sight, rendering them temporaily stunned. (Making the new camo settings something you'll want to use only on your second, third, fourth, or fith play-through, lest you ruin a "pure" first-time experience.)

Taking on The Patriots and getting kooky with Kojima? That's what we call a fun way to spend the Fourth.

Solid Snake's swan song seems destined to be heard by many a PlayStation 3 owner, with Famitsu (translated by IGN) confirming that Metal Gear Solid 4: Guns of the Patriots has shipped three million copies to various destinations worldwide. Speaking at a recent Sony investor meeting in Tokyo, SCE president Kaz Hirai reportedly noted that Hideo Kojima's opus has had a beneficial effect on PS3 hardware sales.

Though its effects have been quite clear in Japan, the UK's Chart-Track group has previously stated that MGS4, despite being a top seller, only managed to have "minimal impact" on the PS3's selling rate. Konami has made no announcement regarding US sales yet, though we expect to see plenty of Metal Gear sold action on next month's NPD report.

Senior stealth citizen news now, with European Metal Gear Solid 4: Guns of the Patriots sales exceeding one million units in its first week. Konami has called the demand for the game "exceptional," noting that the final chapter in Solid Snake's spiraling saga has seen high sales in all European territories. The 25,000 Limited Edition copies made available to the continent were "almost immediately" sold out. Figures.

The PlayStation 3 sneak-em-up has seen similar success in Japan, outselling its closest competitor by a factor of 12. If you're among the million Metal Gears Sold and don't know your Gekkos from your Frogs, be sure to download the free MGS4 Database from the Euro PlayStation Network this Thursday.

Update: A winner has been selected and contacted via e-mail. Congrats!

So this "Hideo Kojima" guy totally ruined our copy of Metal Gear Solid 4. He had the nerve to scribble all over it in permanent marker. It looks like he ... signed it? Yuck!

His signature has obviously tarnished our copy. It's worthless now, so we're giving it away in this latest edition of Joyswag: Garbage Edition. Go ahead, take it away from us. We don't want it! Bah!

To enter this giveaway, leave a comment expressing your earnest desire to collect our garbage. Comments must be left before 5PM EST on Monday, June 23rd. Only one comment per person per calendar day -- or else! One winner will be selected in a random drawing. Grand Prize Winner will receive a copy of Metal Gear Solid 4: Guns of the Patriots (signed by Hideo Kojima and Yumi Kikuchi) for PS3 (MSRP: $60). Click here for complete Official Rules. Eligibility is restricted to the legal residents of the 50 United States (including DC) and Canada (excluding Quebec). You must be 18 years or older to enter.

For another chance to win an autographed copy, visit PS3 Fanboy.

There have been plenty of times when we've dreamed about looking into Hideo Kojima's mind, if only to leave therein the suggestion that it's really about time for another Zone of the Enders or Snatcher game. But we never took the idea quite as literally as Kojima himself, who has the above MRI of his own noggin on display at his workplace. The pic was snapped a couple of years ago by MTV.

The site has a larger version of Headeo Kojima, just perfect for ... whatever dark purpose some of you have already begun envisioning.

My experience thus far with Hideo Kojima's latest mega-game has been a bit different than that of my cohort Ross Miller's. Whereas Ross is a self-proclaimed MGS noob, I've been playing the series since its inception, having taken Snake (and Big Boss) through every game in canon and out.

A major theme in MGS4 is how "war has changed," and, right from the get-go, I was noticing how MGS has changed in the process. So far, it's been largely for the better. Keep on reading for more impressions from the perspective of an old "Tactical Espionage Action" dog who's learning new tricks.

Hideo Kojima stopped by New York City's Virgin Megastore in TImes Square to meet and greet fans at the Metal Gear Solid 4 launch. We got a number of signed copies ... maybe one will go to a lucky reader (if we feel generous enough!). Check out our gallery below, or some highlights, after the cut.

A hero's true worth lies in his ability to overcome the greatest of villains. Metal Gear Solid's slithery protagonist, Snake, has conquered not only the greatest of villains, but the weirdest mustache-twirlers gaming has ever seen.

Be sure to click on the above gallery and join us as we examine our favorite fearsome foes, kooky killers and big bosses.

Need a refresher on Kojima's forthcoming masterpiece? Check out our game page for all things Metal Gear Solid 4: Guns of the Patriots. Seriously, this is everything we've written on the game. Bookmark the page, as we'll be constantly updating with new content in the lead-up to MGS4's worldwide launch next week.

Note: The MGS4 page also benefits from not having comments and is therefore spoiler free. That said, we will do our best to monitor the comment system, at our own risk, and delete spoilers. Still, we're human, so be careful when treading through comments, on any website, for the next few weeks.

To those who do post spoilers: Expect to see a banhammer slam into your forehead.

Konami has announced three opportunities for US fans of the MGS series to meet the creators and stars of the insta-classic Metal Gear Solid 4: Guns of The Patriots in person, beginning with the midnight launch of the game in NYC and Los Angeles. As an added bit of extra-coolness, Konami will be selling an undisclosed number of the limited edition MGS4 PS3 bundles regular MGS4 PS3 bundles at each event for $499.99. We've got the full schedule of events after the break.

[Update: The Gunmetal PS3 will not be sold at these launch events. Instead, the regular 80GB Metal Gear Solid 4 bundle will be offered. This includes a standard black 80GB system, a regular copy of Metal Gear Solid 4 and a DualShock 3 controller. We apologize for any confusion.]