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"Understand this: The Sam Fisher you knew is dead." Spolier alert! Nah, he's very much alive (albeit starring in a game that's delayed yet again), and this latest trailer for Splinter Cell: Conviction features one Victor Coste, private military contractor and veritable encyclopedia on all things that make a (now) former Third Echelon agent go ker-azy.

And man, can he lay it on. "He's off the leash and going for answers," Coste says, in an extremely serious tone. We think the first question Fisher's going to ask this guy when he catches him is, "Just how many times have you watched The Bourne Identity, anyway?"

We've got another two months to go before the release of Splinter Cell Conviction. That's plenty of time, it would seem, for Ubisoft to tease us relentlessly with more information and gameplay snippets, as evidenced by the latest trailer. It's filled with a mess of information for returning Splinter Cell fans, and capped off by the realization that, "For the first time, you'll feel what it's like to be one of those NPCs hunted by a Splinter Cell." And yes, that prospect looks just as terrifying as it sounds.

"We had to find a martial art that fits the characters and the situations he would find himself in," animation director Gilles Monteil tells us in this new dev diary for Splinter Cell Conviction. "We needed something very quick, efficient and brutal -- something without any rules. That's why we chose Krav Maga."

"Krav Maga is not a big flashy martial art," game designer Steve Masters adds, which may explain its relative obscurity. Turning to Wikipedia, we discover it has its origins in street fighting and literally means "close combat" in Hebrew, and that the Israeli Defense Force and Special Forces use the martial art to this day. Apparently, stabbing someone in the hand is kosher in a form that has "no rules."

As if the piece on CNN weren't enough, the Internet's own "Keyboard Cat" has just been given the Sam Fisher homeless militant makeover for a recent video advertising Splinter Cell Conviction's upcoming PAX appearance. Titled, "Play him off, Keyboard Sam," the video ... well, we've embedded it after the break. We refuse to spoil the hilarity for you. Enjoy.

After teasing us with the carefully scripted Splinter Cell Conviction E3 demo -- for the umpteenth time -- lead designer Steve Masters commented on the game's current status as a "March quarter" release today at Ubisoft's "Holiday Preview" event (we'll be celebrating well into 2010, you know). Masters echoed CEO Yves Guillemot in saying, "really [the delay] was just a decision to allow us to polish up and really deliver the experience that the fans are looking for."

"Right now we're about to hit alpha -- literally this week," Masters confirmed. "So that means the levels are largely complete, and now it's just time to polish them up and get them looking really great, and playing really well." The current (and what better be final) iteration of the fifth Splinter Cell game has been in development for roughly eighteen months, according to Masters.

On the topic of platform exclusivity, the designer continued to tiptoe along Ubisoft's party line when it came to discussing the apparent arrangement with Microsoft. "I can't really go into the details there. All I can say is that we're really exploiting the full power of the Microsoft console here, and Microsoft has been tremendous in giving us a lot of support and really helping us to utilize the full power of the 360," Masters offered. "I don't think that we're ever gonna go to the PS3. But I can't confirm or deny it."

As for Project Natal and the future of the Splinter Cell franchise? "I would love to use Natal. I think there are a lot of very cool possibilities with that -- everything from doing outrageously interesting educational stuff to really-involving video games." Did he say, educational? Ah, so that's what exploring Milo is all about ... and here we thought it was just outrageous. "I've only had a very quick demo with [Natal]. I haven't had any serious, in-depth hands-on, but I know Ubisoft has been working with it."

Finally, Masters fielded our most pressing question ... Who would win in a fight: Sam Fisher or Jack Bauer? Masters emphatically declared Fisher the clear favorite given his superior sneaking abilities. But if the match-up was limited to a 24-hour time frame? "Bauer does have tremendous bowel control," Masters conceded. "I think that might be the tipping point in this battle."

Despite his comfy Jason Bourne-like turtleneck and new 'tude, Sam Fisher hasn't been able to reinvent himself as far as his aging body goes. Splinter Cell: Conviction will see our stealthy superdude slinking around in his 50s, an age mostly associated with dust and Werther's Originals. "He's pretty old, actually," a game dev told VG247 back at E3, further adding that Fisher would definitely be in his 50's for Conviction. Heck, we could only hope to look that good when we hit our 50s!

So, Sam, what's your secret? Centrum Silver?

When we saw the newest trailer for Splinter Cell: Conviction at last week's E3, we were a bit more than taken aback. A handful of glaring changes have been made to the game since we last saw it, and it's obvious that an enormous amount of time has been spent to mold Conviction into what it is today.

These changes became all the more apparent when we re-watched the original 2007 trailer for the title, featuring emo Sam Fisher in all his polygonal glory. What you see above is the closest approximation we could make of running both trailers concurrently, highlighting the incredible metamorphosis it has undergone in the past two years.

When it was first released in 2002, Tom Clancy's Splinter Cell focused on the military operations of the fictitious government organization, Third Echelon. Since 2006's Splinter Cell: Double Agent, the story of the franchise has shifted from the overall mission objectives to the character of Sam Fisher himself.

During a one-on-one interview with Ubisoft producer Alexandre Parizeau during E3 2009, we asked why the franchise has shifted focus to the character of Sam. According to Parizeau the answer is simple, after dealing with so much trauma throughout the series, Ubisoft Montreal wanted players to see how Sam's methods have evolved, which led to shaping Conviction's dynamic and offensive stealth gameplay. "He's not going to be the same person when he reacts to situations as he was when he was working for Third Echelon. It's a completely different scenario," Parizeau told us.

After the death of his daughter and the loss of others close to him, it seems that Sam Fisher is a man with nothing to lose -- and if the game continues to impress as it did at E3, Xbox 360 and PC gamers will gain a stellar (timed?) exclusive.

"I lost my daughter. I shot my best friend."

Boo hoo, Sam Fisher. Are you going to get some black lipstick now to match your totally emo beard?

In all seriousness, though, it appears the long-delayed Splinter Cell Conviction might, y'know, actually come out. Ubisoft has opened a second teaser site for the game, promising even more updates on May 20th and May 28th. This is great news for the Joystiq staff, as we've been relegated to using the same screenshot for nearly every Splinter Cell story for the last two years. Finally! Something new to Photoshop.

No, no, no, don't cry, Sam! Oh, now look, you've ruined your mascara. It appears emo Sam Fisher is going to be sitting on the sidelines a little longer as Ubisoft announced today that Splinter Cell: Conviction is being delayed until the company's next fiscal year. For those who don't tell time through corporate fiscal calendars, that means Conviction won't be released until after April of 2009.

Rumors of Conviction's delay have been floating around for months, kicked into overdrive by the game's no-show at Ubidays and E3. Back in May, the development team said it would be showing the game in "forthcoming months." Well, there's still Tokyo and Leipzig ...

The Sarcastic Gamer gang has been slipped another round of supposedly "inside" info regarding the rumored nixing of actor Michael Ironside as the voice of Splinter Cell's Sam Fisher. Rather than simply more "he's gone" talk, this time there are actual (rumored) details concerning the (also rumored) split, which comes during what has been a turbulent development process for Splinter Cell: Conviction.

According to the latest hubbub, Ironside was given the boot for being generally difficult to work with ... and asking for more compensation than publisher Ubisoft deemed sufficient for his work. Bear in mind that Ubisoft still hasn't commented on the situation, so all of this is just as plausibly deniable as one of agent Fisher's missions.

[Via X3F]

There's an enormous void in our brains where Splinter Cell: Conviction should be. It wasn't long ago that the Xbox 360-exclusive spy simulator used to occupy a significant chunk of the quadrant reserved for games being released in 2007 but, after several increasingly vague reports – not to mention the game's total absence at the recent Ubidays event – we're having a hard time remembering it ... this was the one where Sam Fisher goes totally emo, right?

Well, he was totally emo last time we saw him but who knows what state the game's gravelly voiced protagonist is in now. If a rumor on Sarcastic Gamer is to be believed, the hero's distinctive voice – heretofore provided by star of stage and screen and Scanners, Michael "Ironside" Ironside – may be replaced for this latest version with who the hell knows. We've put our feelers out but, as long as we've got you all here, let's do some brainstorming. We all realize David Hayter will be missing those Solid Snake checks pretty soon and, assuming this rumor is true for just 7 seconds, Ubisoft may need a leading man('s voice) pretty soon. David, Ubisoft. Ubisoft, David. Imagine it:

Sam! SAM! SAAAAMMMMMMM!

An interesting rumor coming from our chums over at Sarcastic Gamer tells us that, according to their "people", they've been informed that voice actor Michael Ironside (the iconic voice behind Splinter Cell's Sam Fisher) has been axed and will not voice Fisher in the upcoming release Conviction. Sarcastic Gamer's tipster didn't give any reason for Ironside's dismissal, but we have a feeling that, if this turns out to be true, the almighty dollar would be to blame. Let's just hope this rumor ends up being hogwash, because we think we can all agree that Sam Fisher isn't Sam Fisher without Ironside behind the mic. Ubisoft, with fury in our eyes and fists clenched, we're warning you. Don't you screw Conviction up like this.

(Cue The Incredible Hulk "Lonely Man" theme after the break) According to CVG, the latest issue of Xbox World 360 states that Splinter Cell Conviction is going dark until late 2009 or Spring 2010. The magazine speculates Conviction was sent back to the drawing board after games like Ubisoft's own Assassin's Creed made it seem outdated.

Ubisoft's response to the story has been to pull a "no comment" and say that the news piece is pure speculation. Videogaming 247 states the last press release about the title (from last Summer) had Conviction hitting retail in late 2007. Some answers on Conviction's fate may be revealed at Ubisoft's UbiDays event in Paris next week

Read -- Splinter Cell Conviction 'back to drawing board'
Read -- Ubisoft refuses comment