Valve's Doug Lombardi just shot us an email containing the final box art for ... wait, what was it again? Something about "Left" and "Dead." Ah, that's right! It's Left 4 Dead. Thanks, Mangled Hand! What would we have done without you? It's a shame you won't be able to grace the cover of the sequel, though. Perhaps your brother could ... unless he's let all that money he got from the Dead Spacecover shoot go to his head thumb.
Unfortunately, neither GlaDOS, nor any other "story elements", will be included in the extra content. As excited as we are for this expansion, the prospect of zipping around an abandoned research facility without the accompaniment of an unsettling, sing-song voice just doesn't seem right.
The zombie apocalypse is not funny. Modern civilization crumbles, your friends are eaten alive and those with a pulse are forced to adopt a rather rigorous and unrelenting exercise program, one largely motivated by the desire to stay alive. Shakily counting out your precious remaining bullets and praying that the snarling, undead legion won't find you huddling beneath a desk is hardly a situation worthy of a chuckle. It certainly isn't the basis for a fun party game.
"It is a fun party game, in a way," remarks Valve's Chet Faliszek. The fun party game in question, of course, is Left 4 Dead, a team-based shooter that actually makes Armageddon amusing. Don't get us wrong -- horrible, horrible things are happening to you and three friends. You're all fighting for your lives, living from room-to-room as you aggressively expend ammo, rummage for medical supplies and desperately try not to shoot each other in the back. Good times!
At the Electronic Arts press conference, Valve's Gabe Newell revealed that Left 4 Dead sports a new cast of main characters. Here's your quartet, shown above, with bigger pictures in the galleries. Left 4 Dead will leave you stranded in November.
First the Medic, then Pyro, and now Mr. Heavy. Valve has announced that the Heavy class is next in line for Team Fortress 2 class updates (i.e. new weapons and achievements). Additionally, Valve said it will "open up the process a little" in talking about how the update is designed. The goal of the update is to "make the Heavy more viable when he has no Medic to pair with" but in a manner that does not significantly change the Heavy's role in the game. We're interested to see how those ideas and constrants translate to new firepower.
Back in April, a website used by Valve to manage its Steam-related Cyber Cafe business was hacked. As we reported then, the hacker, known as "MaddoxX," claimed to have gained access to a variety of sensitive data, including credit card numbers. Well, the jig is finally up.
A special Dutch police unit, "Team High Tech Crime" (certainly somehow related to G.I. Joe), nabbed the culprit in the town of Maastricht on June 24. Dutch authorities report that he hacked an Activision server prior to the Valve job, obtaining a pre-release version of Enemy Territory: Quake Wars. He is also charged with stealing nearly 50,000 credit card numbers from a UK-based ticket sales service, using some of them to buy electronics and play online poker.
In lieu of a prison sentence, we suggest that "MaddoxX" be assigned to a work release program at Aperture Science.
Reader Ian G. recently submitted an image to us that he accidentally discovered using a StumbleUpon toolbar, which appears to be an early draft of an upcoming update for Team Fortress 2's most innocuous of classes, the Spy. The origins of said image are unknown -- perhaps it's a leak from Valve's vault? A convincing photoshop from a dedicated fan? Perhaps Ian is in possession of a magical StumbleUpon toolbar, capable of stumbling into the future?
While it certainly looks convincing, we're leaning towards "convincing photoshop" -- especially considering most of the text is copied and Elmer's school glued from Valve's official Pyro update. As credible as the new weapons (such as the silenced PPK and the Garrote) and achievements (Joykill: Backstab a laughing enemy) look, we doubt the legitimacy of these supposed details about our masked, nicotine-infused friend.
Update: Given the final line of the copyright information at the bottom of the page, which reads "Hoax by Ka anin :P!", we're ready to go ahead and file this one under B, for bunko.
Randy posted such a good hands-on experience with Left 4 Dead last month, that it would be outrageous for us to try and repeat his performance. So, we spent some time asking the guys at Valve what they'd changed between now and then. They were showing off the exact same level in order to illustrate how far they'd come in the five weeks they'd had in-between demos. New world art throughout the level was a lot grittier and moodier, and will probably cause quite a few players to pee in their pants. Read on while we hunt for a dry pair.
You've been 4-warned. Valve's PC and Xbox 360 zombie apocalypse sim, Left 4 Dead, will be overturning store shelves in a frantic search for essential supplies on November 4th. We highly recommend that you and three of your best friends shoot through the throbbing, mindless masses of a dilapidated modern society, if only so you can get home quicker and load up the game.
Be sure to read our hands-on impressions before you brave the undead hordes. And for heaven's sake, never go back for the dog. That's just stupid.
A new update Team Fortress 2 is now available via Steam and includes major updates to the Pyro class. The basic flamethrower has alternate fire compression blast, the hadouken taunt now kills people and, most importantly, three new weapons have been added, to be unlocked by conquering the 35 new Pyro achievements.
The update also adds two community maps (cp_fastlane and ctf_turbine). Don't forget, Team Fortress 2 is free to play all weekend starting tomorrow. You can pre-load the game now.
The big overhaul of Team Fortress 2's Pyro class won't arrive until tomorrow, but Valve is pulling the veil off of the changes today, including three new weapons and 35 new achievements for the firestarter.
At the top there, you see the Flare Gun, which replaces the Pyro's shotgun and lets you light up enemies at long range. In the middle? It's the Axtinguisher, the melee weapon that always makes a critical hit on flaming enemies. Finally, there's the Back Burner, which is guaranteed to crit if it hits a foe from behind.
If we still haven't cured your pyromania (we've been waiting all post to say that) check out all the details right here.
The game may be ancient by our warped internet standards of time, but we're more than happy to make a mini-tub of popcorn and watch another one of Valve's Team Fortress 2 vignettes. Although Pyro is getting an upgradethis Thursday in the game, it's the Sniper who gets the mini-film treatment above.
Now we just need Pyro, Spy and Medic to get their episodes and this whole affair can come to an end ... although we wouldn't mind future clips featuring the whole cast in hilariously psychotic situations. Just saying, Valve, we really wouldn't mind.
A Kotaku tipster seems to have stumbled upon a casting call for "a character for a new game in the Portal series from Valve Software" on subscribers-only actors resource Breakdown Express. The posting is loaded with character details for the game's "principal antagonist," including his history, demeanor and general outlook on life. The posting even details how the character's psychology changes as the story progresses, hinting at some intriguing story possibilities for the sequel to our top game of 2007.
If you don't mind having such important details spoiled at least seven months before the game is released, follow the read link and, er, read all about it. Or, if you're a voice actor who can handle "dark comedy ... with occasional dramatic moments" starting next month, why not try out for a piece of video game immortality?
