Inside every horror filmmaker lurks a budding comedian struggling to claw its way out, showering the audience with the goo inside. At least that's Microsoft's hope, as this week the company tapped a handful of directors, known for creeping us out in films like Hard Candy and Friday the 13th, to create a set of freely downloadable comedy shorts for release globally this fall over Xbox Live to coincide with the service's major facelift.

The brainchild of Slither's James Gunn and Peter Safran of Scary Movie infamy, the film series has a number of notable directors on board, including James Wan (Saw), David Slade (30 Days of Night), Lucky McKee (The Woods), Andrew Douglas (The Amityville Horror) and Marcus Nispel (The Texas Chainsaw Massacre). With each itching to trade in their bloody hatchets for hilarious, madcap antics, with now look forward to the filmmakers' unique take on what promises to be sidesplitting comedy.

The recently rumored game show channel for Xbox Live was officially announced at this morning's Microsoft press conference in the form of "Xbox Live Primetime." TV producer Endemol has teamed up with Microsoft to produce the new massively-multiplayer game show channel, which will include a version of the semi-popular NBC show 1 vs. 100, complete with real prizes (no word on whether host Bob Saget is involved). Primetime is part of Microsoft's new "Live Party" community channel, which includes the long-rumored Avatars. No word on what, if any, other game shows will be coming to Primetime, but we're hoping for a version of Ninja Warrior that involves rampant button mashing.

No sooner does Sony (briefly) improve the PS3 user interface with the much-talked-about version 2.4 firmware update, than some at the company feel cocky enough to start badmouthing the competition's interface. Speaking to Next-Gen, PlayStation Network Director of Operations Eric Lempel took the bait, comparing Sony's redesigned PlayStation Store to Microsoft's Xbox Live Marketplace. "I think if I look over at the competitors' UI they may have some issues just displaying content," Lempel said, "and scrolling up and down lists isn't the easiest way to find things." Tell that to McSweeny's, why don'tcha?

Lempel also pointed out that the PlayStation Store interface has "a lot of room with virtual shelf space to put a lot of things," a not-so-subtle jab at Microsoft's recently announced plan to de-list some Xbox Live Arcade games. "Depending on what type of UI you have you can accommodate a lot of titles," Lempel continued, "and specifically with our new store redesign which launched back in April we have a great ability to merchandise a wide variety of titles." That's all well and good, assuming your PS3 is currently working.

[Via X3F]

You know that sweet Ikea bookshelf you've been fawning over? It would go great in the family room, proudly displaying all of your favorite books and even that Precious Moments statue you pretend to like when your girlfriend stops by. It's functional, and makes things easy to find. But put a few thousand items on that same bookshelf and what you'd be left with is a colossal mess, something not unlike Microsoft's great, but equally cluttered Xbox Live Marketplace.

Speaking to MTV Multiplayer, Aaron Greenberg, Microsoft's Xbox 360 and Xbox Live product management director, owned up to the service's organization ills. "I think that we are not...happy with the ability to find and discover content," he said, adding that Microsoft "built Xbox Live Marketplace for a few hundred items and now we have 17,000 items."

It's something the company is hoping to correct, at least in part with its controversial decision to shelve under-performing Xbox Live Arcade releases, but Greenberg admits that Microsoft is still looking for a solution to make content on Xbox Live easier to track down. We've contacted our Joystiq mentalists, who are at this very moment trying to project two simple words into the minds of XBL devs. Search. Bar.

If you find yourself in the mood to pay to watch G4's gamer-oriented line of television programming, you can now scratch that puzzling itch on the Xbox Live Marketplace, where several of the network's original television programs have been made available for download. These programs include Attack of the Show, snowboard documentary series The Block, and animated comedy series Code Monkeys (which includes a free sneak preview of the show's second season).

Oddly enough, X-Play is not one of the shows featured on Microsoft's service, despite the fact that the daily half-hour Sess-fest is one of the highest rated programs on the network. A shame, too -- we would actually dish out some Microsoft buckz to avoid wading through the countless reruns of Fastlane, Cops, Cheaters, and other "gamer-oriented" programs to watch the oft-renamed program. Alas, we must continue to suffer the seemingly limitless douchebaggery of Joey Greco.

It probably comes as no shock that Aaron Greenberg, director of product management for Xbox Live, believes Grand Theft Auto IV could very well take the top spot on Live from the see-saw battle waged between Call of Duty 4 and Halo 3. Greenberg tells Reuters that the multiplayer is so well implemented in GTA IV that he can't imagine anyone who owns a copy of the game not trying it on Xbox Live.

Greenberg goes on to say that GTA IV appeals to such a large audience and it'll probably be the best-selling game launched all year. GTA's multiplayer is certainly a different experience from COD 4 and Halo's first-person perspective, and could easily take the top spot on Live with curious players testing it, but whether the game's multiplayer is actually deep enough to hold on to players remains to be seen.

[Via GameDaily]

Is it Christmas again, already? Xbox.com is acknowledging what many of you probably already know, which is that Xbox Live is having some issues. The service is "up and running," but users may experience matchmaking and voice communication issues.

Now it's time to play the half-glass game! Glass is half-empty: Why are customers paying for a service that can't fulfill its basic promoted functions? Broken services should be free. Glass is half-full: At least it's happening now. It could be worse, this could still be going on next week during the GTA IV launch.

[Via Engadget, X3F]

Did you know that every foul obscenity, racial slur, and homophobic epithet collects in the corners of Xbox Live, much akin to the mood slime in "Ghostbusters II"? It can cause some serious latency issues -- though unfortunately, it cannot be cleared away by a rousing chorus of Auld Lang Syne. It takes hours of tedious chiseling and scraping to clear this hate plaque from Microsoft's servers, during which time Xbox Live is made unavailable for CoD4 grinding and piñata swapping.

Unfortunately for those 360 owners with online gaming on the docket for this coming Monday morning, Xbox Live will be down for said maintenance for eight hours. Before you get your hopes up, Gamerscore Blog assured everyone that this is not the fabled spring update, just some routine sprucing. We know the thought of division from the gaming hivemind is unbearable, but we trust you can go without from 2 a.m. to 10 a.m. PST (that's 5 a.m. to 1 p.m. EST, or "Too Legit 2 Quit" to "Pumps in a Bump" in Standard Hammer Time.)

Hey, it's tough to keep the lid on an exciting secret. If we knew Ikaruga was coming to Xbox Live Arcade this Wednesday, we'd probably blurt it out at every opportunity too. Sort of like what we're doing now. In case you haven't gathered, Treasure's mesmerizing shooter is finally, officially coming to Xbox 360 this week -- f'realz, confirmed and for 800 MS Points ($10). You're all smiles now, but just wait until the game crushes your ego to a pulp in its unrelenting, unforgiving bullet-hell fist.

Those who prefer their gaming to be less hectic and humiliating should note that Poker Smash is receiving some downloadable content this week, with an "Environment Pack" adding two new Action Mode environments and a "Puzzle Pack" adding 15 new weapons. No, wait ... puzzles. Definitely puzzles. Each pack will set you back 100 MS Points ($1.25).

While we doubt Oblivion will credit Reality Pump's Two Worlds as the wind beneath its wings, we still can't help but wonder if it's cold there living in the shadow of Bethesda's role-playing opus. Nevertheless, the lesser of the two open-ended RPGs continues to get love by way of downloadable content, the latest of which dropped today over Xbox Live.

Dubbed Curse of Souls, the 600 point multiplayer-focused affair is the game's second, following the already available Tainted Blood, and promises, among other things, an extra 10 hours of content spread over 35 new quests. The download also adds a player-versus-player arena throwdown in the town of Tharnburg, no doubt making for a thrilling spectacle for the handful of players still frolicking in the world of Antaloor as they wait for the game's recently confirmed sequel.

[Via Press Release]

When Infinity Ward producer, Mark Rubin, told Eurogamer that the number of online users for the PS3 version of Call of Duty 4 was "monstrously huge," we can only assume he was referring to a beast of significant size and infinite terror -- which pretty much rules out those Pokemon things. Indeed, the multiplayer monster appears to be of the house-trampling, child-eating variety, with Rubin having declared, "No other game has come close, either online current, or total unique users in a day."

The battle between Call of Duty 4 and Halo 3 for Xbox Live supremacy was also mentioned, with the former shooter's "between 1.2 and 1.3 million users every day" trumping Bungie's slightly more spartan servers. As for the percentage of total game owners (over seven million at last count) that have taken their tactics online, Rubin describes the number as "startling." Who knew statistics could be so scary?

Microsoft has announced that Hollywood producer/talent producer Peter Safran has signed a deal with the company to produce original content for Xbox Live (via The New York Times). The first shows will scripted (i.e. not reality shows), run under 10 minutes in length and are expected to come out in the Fall.

Said Scott Nocas, Xbox Live's global marketing manager for programming: "We definitely look at this as the first of many." The shows, according to Safran, will be exclusive to the service for a time and might then appear elsewhere. Safran also said that some of the content would be supported by advertising.

As noted by the NYT, Safran represents Sean "P. Diddy" Combs, Nia Vardolos (My Big Fat Greek Wedding) and the directors of Epic Movie. Safran said he expects to recruit "established filmmakers" but was not planning to seek out major movie stars.

[Via Engadget]

Ever since the announcement of Ninja Gaiden II's June 3rd release, we've become increasingly annoyed with the months of April and May. As is the case with those insolent, slow-moving people who bunch up in front of you at the supermarket, we really just want to ram them out of the way so that we may fill our cart to the brim with candy as quickly as possible. Having turned around and spotted our menacing glares, May has at least shown some decency by offering us a sampler -- a Ninja Gaiden II demo to be precise (and free of rambling allegories).

According to Microsoft's Ninja Gaiden II website, those eager to decapitate demons, mangle monsters and otherwise alliteratively assault archfiends can expect to download a demon-stration from Xbox Live Marketplace in May. The page also advises to look for "exclusive" content from April 15th, no doubt referring to things like gamerpics, themes and videos pretending to be demos. Wait, we're not falling for that one again, are we?

Netflix told Reuters today that it's been surveying its subscribers about interest in streaming movies using the Xbox 360. The company declined to go as far as saying this meant there was a partnership in the works, but did say it's looking to use "as many ways as possible" to provide its service to consumers.

The whole "Netflix on consoles" thing has been batting around for a while with reports last month that Netflix was running surveys to gauge consumer interest. Netflix has made no secret that it wants to be on consoles and our eyebrows were already raised way up early last year when Netflix CEO Reed Hastings joined the Microsoft board of directors. If Microsoft doesn't want to go down the Blu-ray path, but still wants to offer a service that makes it stand out, Netflix would certainly make a marquee alternative.

The much-improved Rock Band store announced to the world yesterday is now available on Xbox Live and PSN. A 30-second download and installation gives players access to the streamlined song-buying interface, which features audio previews and individual instrument difficulties for each song, as well as a much simpler way to sort and browse through the growing selection of music.

Besides the cool new store, we're also extremely gratified by the much-needed faster loading of DLC provided by the patch. After a one-time file creation upon the first post-patch load, the annoying little "loading additional content" animation was reduced from roughly ten seconds to about one second in our tests on Xbox Live. The physical "download data file" that actually speeds up the process takes up a paltry 112KB on our system, meaning there's no reason not to rock out faster!