Earth Defense Force: Insect Armageddon review: Shoot, shoot, shoot, end

by Justin McElroy on Jul 7th 2011 2:25PM

It's not that it's a failure.

I can see what Earth Defense Force: Insect Armageddon wants to be: A mindless, explosive shooting gallery. I can also see that it does a pretty good job of meeting that goal. It's mindless, stuff explodes, there's shooting. Top marks all around.

But no matter how I tried to see the brighter side of this basically good-hearted game, I couldn't shake an inescapable truth: This is dumb, and you deserve better.

Earth Defense Force: Insect Armageddon (E3 2011)

You're a member of Strike Force Lightning (yes, it's called that) and you have to kill a lot of giant bugs and alien spaceships that are wreaking havoc in ~~Neo New York~~ New Detroit. Every level is in an expansive, almost completely destructible cityscape, but your goals won't vary too much throughout the game. "Walk over here", "kill these bugs" and "blow up this bug hole" is pretty much the extent of this third-person shooter's gameplay vocabulary.

That said, "kill these bugs" is a shockingly large umbrella. You can kill the bugs with four different types of soldiers, ranging in mobility, attack strength and abilities. You kill them with a wide array of weapons, from assault rifles to grenade launchers -- an array that will get even wider as you gain experience, improving your abilities and arsenal. You can even bring a couple of online or couch co-op buddies into the fight with you, playing through the campaign or a Horde-like survival mode.

And none of it means a god-damned thing.

Earth Defense Force: Insect Armageddon is extermination porn, free of narrative, compelling gameplay or anything other than highly murderable bugs

Because no matter what you're firing and who you're firing with, you're still just leaning on the right trigger until the voice in your head tells you you don't have to any more. Maybe the bugs explode in a gooey mess a little earlier or later than they otherwise would have, and maybe you have some people to talk to while you do it. But as long as you keep on that trigger and don't let up until the giant bugs die, you'll eventually prevail. Or not. It doesn't matter.

I had to make my peace with this pretty early on. Losing all your health means having to wait on a revival from a teammate. Whether or not they had the health to get to me and revive me depended on how long it'd been since they themselves had been revived, which I had no control over. In essence, whether or not we lost the mission was random. This wouldn't be so troubling if there were any checkpoints whatsoever in the often 20-minute-long levels.

The first few times I had to re-experience 20 minutes of drudgery, I was infuriated, until I realized that I was caring about it far more than the game was. As far as Insect Armageddon was concerned, I had been shooting bugs before I died and I was shooting bugs after, so what was the problem? This ambivalence to all things not directly related to bug murder is carried through right to the finale, when there's no climax, no denouement, not even any frigging credits. The bug killing just stops, and then you're kicked back to level select so you can kill some more stuff.

The only times my pulse even approached pounding was when I killed particularly large bug aliens or their ships, and even that excitement was generated by the sheer scale of my opponent. To put it another way, the height of Insect Armageddon's sophistication is when it prods whatever ancient holdover in my brain kept my caveman ancestors away from dinosaurs. What's that? Cavemen never co-existed with dinosaurs? Sorry, I don't know that because this dumb game has turned me into a big dumb idiot.

Even that thrill of fighting a giant creature had plenty of time to wear off as every large enemy has a comically large amount of health, turning set piece battles into cramp-inducing slogs.

"Thing big! I shoot big thing!"

There is a place for action games that aren't particularly cerebral (what's up, 50 Cent: Blood on the Sand?) but they do still have to have some semblance of game design. Earth Defense Force 2017 is no master class in game theory, but there's a genuine B-movie charm buoying the proceedings. Here, that's replaced with calculated, charmless badness. ("I'm liveblogging this whole thing, and my hits are through the roof!" exclaims one soldier, as I frantically search the classifieds section of my local paper for any career other than my own.)

If a dramatic film took the Insect Armageddon approach, it would feature only two hours of a woman crying next to a hospital bed as violins played. Sports movies would basically just be Kevin Costner catching baseballs and repeatedly shouting "Baseball!" Porn would be ... well, porn would be pretty much the same.

It's an apt comparison. Earth Defense Force: Insect Armageddon is extermination porn, free of narrative, compelling gameplay or anything other than highly murderable bugs, aliens and alien bugs.

This is normally the part of the review where I'd say "But if you just want to shut your brain off and shoot some bugs, then -- blah, blah, blah" but it would just be too insulting in this case. Even the most brainless of braindead fare can aim higher than this rat-hitting-the-feeder-bar inanity. You deserve better.

This review is based on 360 code of Earth Defense Force: Insect Armageddon purchased by the reviewer.

Tags: d3, earth-defense-force, earth-defense-force-insect-armageddon, edf, microsoft, playstation, ps3, vicious-cycle-software, xbox

Reader Comments (166)

Wow, I've heard nothing but amazingly positive things about this game from people who were fans of EDF 2017. Did you happen to like that at all?

I have a feeling you're going to get slammed for this review.

@Pipp

I'm pretty sure the Earth Defense Force Defense Force will be out in full swing.

@Colin

http://i276.photobucket.com/albums/kk19/Threddd/fry.gif

@Pipp
I have nothing but good to say about the new game!

@Pipp eh, who cares. I think when you review something you should come from it as moderately and middle of the line as possible. Earth Defense Force games are "fun" but an unpolished mess. They also get extremely boring, just like the last one.

@kgoo867

THE OPINIONS OF OTHERS ENRAGES ME TO NO END!

WHEN I READ SOMEONE'S REVIEWS, I DON'T WANT THEIR OPINION ON THE GAME!

@kgoo867

So tell us where your successful gaming blog site is and we'll read your reviews instead Mr Unbiased who knows what EVERYBODY likes and dislikes.

@kgoo867

umad I think you are I think u so very very mad cheer up oh no you still mad

@kgoo867

What are you talking about?... Let's look at some cold hard facts then, shall we?

joystiq.com/2009/09/29/review-uncharted-2-single-player/
joystiq.com/2011/06/14/duels-of-the-planeswalkers-2012-review/
joystiq.com/2011/07/06/deadliest-warrior-legends-review/
joystiq.com/2011/06/17/the-legend-of-zelda-ocarina-of-time-3d-review/
joystiq.com/2011/06/06/infamous-2-review-a-study-in-power/
Uncharted 2, MTG 2012, Deadliest Warrior, Legend of Zelda, Infamous 2. None of which I'd consider overly artsy in the way you're using it... All of which were rated highly, at least 4 stars or more.

joystiq.com/2011/04/21/patapon-3-review/
joystiq.com/2011/04/11/stardrone-review/
joystiq.com/2011/04/04/slam-bolt-scrappers-review/
I'd consider these games artsy (as you're using the word) some aspects of them are debatable, but point being they all tried something new and different, and are all unique games (ignoring the fact that Patapon is a sequel) and all of these games were rated less than favourably.

You are just upset that a man expressed an opinion that was different from yours, and now you're just lashing out.

@HydrophobicFish PSN ID Hydrophob

The problem with game reviews are that they aren't critiquing anything at all. They're just reports of what happened when somoene played again. Compare movie reviews against game reviews. VAST differences between the two. A review should be a well thought out critique, instead of just "this is what happened when i played the game. this is why *I* don't like it. Therefore, because *I* don't like, you shouldn't either and this game is garbage".

Reviews shouldn't have the impact they do in this industry. The hypocrisy flowing through the industry is staggering. Gamers clamor for more original ideas & innovation and less shooters, but when publisher's deliver new, original games, no one buys them unless it's 9-10. (Examples: Okami, Psychonauts, Deadly Premonition). And yet, Black Ops is the best selling game ever. How's that possible? If people REALLY wanted less shooters and more innovation, they sure as shit wouldn't have bought Black Ops. Maybe THAT is why Nintendo won't localize all those games for America: Nobody buys the stuff when they clamor for it, but instead stick to rehashes and sequels.

The same goes for sequels of old games. Golden Sun Dark Dawn was a good game, but it sold like shit. Same goes for Goldeneye 007 on the Wii. Unless they have a metacritic of 90-100 no one buys them. It's a depressing fact that makes me hate the way the industry is going.

@The Great Cornholio

I saw that episode of Extra Credits too. However, it doesn't apply. Justin gave his opinion on the things. He told how the game influenced him (When he talks about the boss fights).

I know what you're saying, but it's half fault of the medium's infancy, half fault of the reader of the reviews.
An example, if you've ever been to a live QA where Justin was there, or really listened to him at all, he hates assigning numbers to reviews... Hell, pretty much all reviewers do. However, the readers want a number, the readers have to be able to say with "cold hard facts" that game X is better than game Y.

Yes, I'd love for game reviews to be more like film reviews, but films have been around a lot longer, we need to wait a little bit for our medium to be viewed the same way. We're on our way though.

@HydrophobicFish PSN ID Hydrophob I agree. I read game reviews to read someone echo my own opinion on the game, not to give their own.

What is that nonsense?

@HydrophobicFish PSN ID Hydrophob
Glad i'm not the only one who actually listens to EC. But i do see what you mean. I honestly do put most of the fault on readers NEEDING a number to decide whether or not a game is "good" instead of either trying the games themselves (be it through a demo, rental or a friend). I honestly think 'Stiq should have stuck with non-numbered reiews, so people would actually still read them in-depth instead of jumping to the bottom, seeing a 2/5 and saying "oh, it sucks and no one should buy it". It's not gonna hurt them to NOT be included in Metacritic.

@Pipp

Got it from Amazon yesterday and I spent the entire evening playing it. What the reviewer claims it's not is exactly what I think it is. But that's just one mans opinion...and I don't get paid to have one. I'm having a blast with it and and got a few friends and my brother picking it up today. I woke up this morning and the wife was even playing it.

The developers knew what they had and were realistic in terms of price. More games should ship at $39. They were not arrogant enough to believe they had a huge so-called triple A title on their hands.

So what is EDF? I'll tell ya...it's Pure Gaming Goodness.

@HydrophobicFish PSN ID Hydrophob The only thing that sucked more than this game were your comments. Huzzah!

@The Great Cornholio

Regarding the whole gamers wanting this yet Black Ops still sells like crazy, etc. You don't seem to realize that the gamers who cry out for innovation and original ideas in no way make up even close to the majority of the video game market. Games like Black Ops sell millions because that's what the mass market wants. The mass market of gamers by and large aren't on forums and blogs talking about games. On the other hand, the super hardcore fans are, and those of course are the ones that wanna see new stuff. So this might give the idea that all gamers are clamoring for originality, etc., but it's really not the case.

"It's not gonna hurt them to NOT be included in Metacritic. "

That is highly, highly unlikely. At the very least, Metacritic is a huge popular site, and the traffic Joystiq gets via links to its reviews on there alone aids likely aids them in a big way. It could even be something so cut and dry as advertisers saying, "Wait, so you're a video game site, but you aren't even featured on Metacritic? Pass. We'll spend our advertising big bucks elsewhere." You shouldn't assume things as such a hard fact without having any actual knowledge of what goes on behinds the scenes. That probably sounds a bit prickish, but... I don't know how to finish this sentence.

@HaVoK308
i absolutely love the above post! i bought this game AND the previous enstallment. by no stretch of the imagination is this top dog for game of the year, but it is damn fun to play.

@Colin I see what you did there...

@The Great Cornholio Why are movie reviews and game reviews so different? Could it be that one medium is based on interactivity, and as such, the experience is SUBJECTIVE? Perhaps you're right, people who have played something should not base their opinions around their experience. Once you've developed your empirical formula for determining the quality of a game, please get back in touch.

@Pipp

2 out of 5??? Whaaaaaaatttttt! I love you guys but come on! This game is great!!! And every other site gave it high marks!

@Unreal Armos

I don't even know what kgoo867 wrote because at the time I'm writing this it's no longer visible.

Also, I haven't been on the site in a while because the vote-down crew has gotten f*cking ridiculous on here. Probably why they stopped whiting it out, but I can only guess.

That said, what you wrote was just about the dumbest f*cking thing I've ever had the misfortune of reading.

@Once known as Shadsy ^^This. Also, the mass appeal vs. originality argument can be made about movies as well. The problem is that people like what they like and experiments only succeed 50% of the time, so creators of both games and movies are much more likely to put their dollars behind a sure thing. I mean, how else do you explain something like Scary Movie 4?

Also, movie reviews are just as subjective as game reviews. The difference is, with movies it's much more likely that peoples' opinions will align. There's only one way to watch a movie after all (I know you can perceive and analyze differently, but you can't lose or glitch out while watching Transformers 3. As much as one might want to...).

And one final thing, the big difference between game reviews and movie reviews is the same as the difference between a book review and a gadget review. As much as you can weight a review toward the quality of the content, when it comes down to it, a game costs $60.00 and a movie ticket costs $10.00. Any reviewer has to balance a fair analysis of the content with the fact that they are giving purchasing advice. If they don't see a game as worth a customer's time or money, it's their obligation to say so. To fail to do so would be unfair to their readership.

Side Note: This is also why people would buy Black Ops over something like Psychonauts. They know they liked that last Call of Duty title, so they'll probably like this new one. It's a safe bet and an economical use of funds (whether or not they put that much thought into it).

@Pipp

I haven't picked up the game yet, but I do plan on it, even after reading this review.

Honestly, sometimes I read Joystiq's reviews and I can tell that the writer just "doesn't get it." This seems to be one of those times. Two other examples of curiously low scores no doubt caused by the same phenomenon was the Castlevania Harmony of Despair review, and Left 4 Dead 2, two games I enjoyed immensely.

There has to be some way to play a game and realize you're "not getting it" and to find exactly what "it" is.

@Pipp
The only thing I got from this review was: "Justin! WTF kind of porn are you watching, dude?"

On a sidenote: "BASEBALL!"

If you played the first EDF then Insect Armageddon should have been exactly what you were expecting as a follow-up game. This game is not bad. Insect Armageddon is mindless sure, but it is supposed to be.

Earth Defense Force:Insect Armageddon is NOT another Duke Nukem where everything fell short of the players expectations, I assure you this game is fun and addicting. I won't lie and say it's without flaws, but I still found myself putting in 5 hour sessions trying to level up so I expand my arsenal to experience new ways to destroy my foe. I can honestly appreciate playing a game like Starcraft 2- that is the opposite of mindless- and still have room to enjoy something like Insect Armageddon. As a gamer, I'm surprised you're unable to do the same.

@The Great Cornholio

While I agree with your sentiment, the logic is flawed. Films are a fixed non-interactive medium, everyone gets more or less the same experience (excluding variables like surround sound and 3D). The film is fixed. Games are a more subjective medium so I reviewer can't account for how everyone plays a game. So game reviews require the reader to be familiar with the types of games a reviewer likes or dislikes.

@Styli

I've heard this argument before but I don't buy it. All forms of entertainment are interactive, games are just moreso than others. If the piece of entertainment does not make you feel like you're interacting with it in some way, it has failed.

I'd say the real challenge in reviewing games compared to other mediums is the time investment. Reviewing a movie, all you have to do is watch the movie, maybe rewatch it again just for good measure. So we're thinking a few hours max, not including the time it takes to write the review and do any necessary research. A "short" game takes as long to beat as it takes to watch 3-5 movies.

I'm not saying Justin gave the game a poor score simply because he didn't spend enough time with it, but I do think sometimes that is the cause for curiously low review scores. If "you just don't get it" it's probably because you haven't spent enough time to get it.

When I tried EDF 2017 at first I though it was utter crap, but I kept playing for the co-op. Then my brother and I started unlocking crazy weapons, and trying to beat the game on the ludicrously tough difficulty levels, inventing truly bizarre strategies to beat certain levels, and suddenly the game's amusement level shot through the roof. I still wish the game had online co-op, as we would probably still be playing it.

"Baseball!"

@A Sandwich Have you seen my baseball?

@A Sandwich

Congratulations, you are now as good an actor as Kevin Costner...and at a fraction of the price!

@baby sea tuna I like that he insinuates that sports movies can have a plot or be entertaining.

@baby sea tuna

"Fraction of the price" my ass.

@baddates77

Ron Shelton is writing you a strongly worded letter as we speak!

Even the review essentially states that the reviewer was taking this game too seriously. I have to wonder what he would have given the original... sounds like possibly even lower than this one.

So whatever, people can like what they want... but considering the original is a blast I'm not thinking I'll have much of a problem with this one.

umad bro?

@Fire Walk With Me I like how the internet gives anyone who doesn't have something actually constructive to say a meme to make it seem like they do. If you read the review you can see where the game sucks. The fact you state "u mad bro" obviously implies you want the game to be good or you enjoy the game. So the real question is "Y U NO Like Good Games?"

@sammo21
you read the review you can see where the game sucks.

no?

@sammo21
... That was convoluted.

@sammo21

U mad bro?

At first I found it really boring. This game blows playing by yourself and I got bored of it by the third mission. I got mine on saturday and my friends preordered at best buy and they didn't sell it until tuesday. I gave it another shot online with friends and its much better.

Awww.... Is somebody cranky today?

Wait.... you can REVIVE EACH OTHER in this one!? Why don't I have this???

" "I'm liveblogging this whole thing, and my hits are through the roof!" exclaims one soldier, as I frantically search the classifieds section of my local paper for any career other than my own. "

What the hell, dude?

This coming from the guy who couldnt figure out how to fish in Nier....

@brotherdaz

Oh snap! You should change your name to Laurence Fish-burn!

@brotherdaz I'd forgotten about that. Definitely a low point for this site, as Nier was a great game if you allowed it to be.

@(Unverified)

If that's the case then this site has had many low points, not to mention other sites as well as people, how many people disliked Monster Hunter :( It got several 5/10 - 6/10 on gaming site :( I think only gametrailers gave it a 7 and they were being generous. It isn't popular in the western world, but I love it, should I be angry at America and Europe for not enjoying it the way I did?

@Spunky Monkey 190906 It wasn't that Joystiq reviewed Nier poorly, as it didn't receive great scores from most reviewers, it's that they didn't review it at all because Mr. McElroy couldn't figure out how to play the game.

@(Unverified)

Yeah, well, that happens, we gamers do the same thing and Joystiq hasn't got a quota of reviews they need to do or a requirement to do them at all, the purely do it for the ones they happen to play. They are informal reviews, if you want proffessional reviews for every game in existance, you should be looking at IGN, Gametrailers or Gamespot for examples.

Its just one guys take on the game, simple as, it wasn't his cup of tea and the fishing got him frustrated, mind you I probably would have gotten annoyed as well and given up, whether or not I chose to review it on that or not is my choice, whether or not you chose to read what I write and accept it or disregard it is your choice. I'm not REQUIRED to write a completely formal and unbiased review.

Like I said, I loved Monster Hunter, others thought it was repetitive, I found Black Ops boring, others thought it was the greatest game known to man, what am I to do? Hunt everyone down and take em hostage until they like my games and hate theirs? lol

@baby sea tuna
Too bad we lost the ability to do that in new Joystiq. ;(

| 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | Most Recent | Next 50 Comments