We think the ESRB is, as a rule, pretty OK. They make it so the kids of good parents can't get adult games and the bad parents at least are forced to walk all the way into the store, which is just fine by us. But sometimes they can keep you from seeing perfectly good, perfectly surreal video game ads such as the one above made by our friends at Mega64 for an "unnamed DS guitar game" (spoiler alert, it's Jam Sessions).
The most heartbreaking thing, as revealed at the end of the ad, is why the video was rejected, which we can guarantee you won't guess. But, always obliging, the guys also made a "safe for the ESRB" version, which you can find just after the break.
[Update: Hey gang, the ESRB says they never saw the ad. We're not sure what the confusion is. The ESRB isn't specifically named in the ad, but we don't know who else they could have been referring to. We'll try to get to the bottom of it for you.]
A recent study conducted by Nielsen Games has uncovered an unsavory and alarming new link in the video game industry's ever-tightening chain around our nation's youth. It was found that 17% of respondents in the survey who had purchased a copy of the popular role-model pummeling game, "Grand Theft Auto IV," were between the ages of seven and sixteen. The crime glorification simulation, which imparts "gamer points" for beating innocent police officers to death with decapitated prostitute bodies, was rated "M" for "Mature."
The most distressing news lies not in the fact that 61% of impressionable youths had been tricked into purchasing the games themselves by slick marketing and peer pressure, but the shocking revelation that 39% had been aided by someone else -- in 80% of these cases, parents themselves had thrust their child's ripe brain beneath the industry's oppressive mallet.
Speaking exclusively to Joystiq, renowned child psychologist Dr. Alphred Larmist described this turn of events as "the ultimate betrayal." According to him, parents could be the most dangerous conduit of pixelated poison. "Parents getting involved is the last thing we need," Larmist said. "If they take an active role in what entertainment their children partake in, this is the sort of disaster that could happen. Next thing you know, they're determining what's appropriate for the kids and going out and buying Grand Theft Auto. They're supposed to be on our side."
Dr. Larmist vowed he would take up the campaign to keep parents and their influence away from children. "If nothing is done, these video gamers will reduce our society to naught but chainsaws having bloody sex with each other."
The ESRB website reportedly leaked word of Niko Bellic and the Grand Theft Auto IV crew heading to the PC. According to Gamesradar, the ratings site listed "Windows PC" among the already-released Xbox 360 and PlayStation 3 platforms. And while we'd love to confirm it ourselves, the Joystiq Hive Mind was malfunctioning this weekend and was unable to see the ratings leak ourselves (it has since been pulled), and we refuse to trust any purportedscreen captures. We've reached out to Rockstar and received the expected, "no comment."
Send the kids to bed, dear readers. It's grown folks time. The Dead Space "Lullaby" trailer we've placed cautiously after the jump is full of ominous environments, severed limbs, and creepy children's songs -- the horror game trailer trifecta. In fact, Ars Technica reports that shortly after viewing the trailer at E3, they received an email from Electronic Arts telling them that the ESRB refused to approve the trailer for American audiences. We're not experts on the subject, but it might have something to do with all the disappendaged torsos. It was cleared for European regions, however, and of course, for the great nation of Internetania. Check it after the break, if you think you can handle it (you probably can).
If there's one thing people in the government hate it's being offended, but luckily there's a tried and true way to alleviate the problem: Subtract offensive, add insulting. Take, for instance, Connecticut attorney general Richard Blumenthal who was peeved that the sure-to-be-awful WiiWare game Frat Party Games: Beer Pong was rated "T." ... You know, for teens.
That was understandably problematic for Blumenthal seeing as the game is so very beer-centric. So, what's the solution, the quick fix from JV Games Vice President Jag Jaeger that makes everyone happy? Why, remove every reference to alcohol and call the game Pong Toss, of course! You know, because you're an idiot.
Here are a few of the recent games that were announced via early ratings by the ESRB: Castlevania: Order of Ecclesia, The Last Guy and Earthbound for Wii. A change in the ESRB's submission form will likely plug up those leaks, according to a memo leaked to Next-Gen. When publishers submit their game for rating, they now have the option to choose a date when the title is eligible to be uploaded to the ESRB's website. If left blank, the game will be eligible for display 30 days after it has been rated.
The ratings board hopes that publishers don't overuse the new option. Said the memo, "The ESRB system will not work for consumers if publishers arbitrarily select dates bearing no reasonable relationship to consumer interest in the product." Our sights now turn to Australia's OFLC, Germany's USK and Britains's BBFC for early game leaks.
The Entertainment Software Ratings Board has rated a previously trademarked, but still largely nebulous PlayStation 3 title called, "The Last Guy." Needless to say, we know more about the behavior and diet of the Narwhal than we know about this E10+ game -- and even then, we just had to look Narwhal up on Wikipedia. Apparently it's some sort of fish thing?
We've requested comment from the folks at Sony, but in lieu of an actual answer, let's consider the most likely (and gratuitously fabricated) explanations:
The Last Guy (being the ultimate next-gen card game): Hook up the PlayStation Eye camera and throw down some cards with three of your mates. Match up numbers, colors and shapes as you attempt to keep your cards for as long as possible. Don't forget to shout, "Last Guy!" when you're the final card holder, or everything is forfeit. "I win!" "No way dude, you didn't say 'Last Guy!' Pick up 47 clubs!"
The Last Guy (being the ultimate next-gen survival-horror): Following a cataclysmic scientific accident involving an egg whisk and inter-dimensional clumsiness, you find yourself to be last guy on Earth. Arming yourself with shovels, pickets, heavy brass doorknobs and whatever else you can find, you embark on a journey fraught with peril and mutated humans who are clearly not guys.
The Last Guy (being the ultimate next-gen castle sim): As the last guy, it's up to you to foil the hero before he beats the entire game. Obstruct the moat with robot crocodiles, instruct your mindless minions and construct the most elaborate (but still homey) deathtrap in the neighborhood. Spinning columns of searing fire? Yes! Unexpectedly placed bottomless pits? Certainly! A barely supportive rope bridge with an axe conveniently located right behind you? Hey, we can't play the game for you!
It's a sad day for those of us who think that a future world entirely populated by desensitized adults trained from birth to be killing machines would be totally sweet. A Federal Trade Commission "undercover shopper" study has found that retailers turned down kids trying to buy M-rated games 80 percent of the time, up 58 percent from the year prior and up from a surprising 16 percent in 2000.
Though the findings are impressive, we don't think retailers should spend too much energy patting themselves on the back. If we saw a 43-year-old FTC agent in a backwards cap and Stone Cold 3:16 T-shirt insisting his name was "Dakota," we probably wouldn't sell M-rated games to him either.
Mother fans, rejoice! EarthBound, also known as Mother 2 and the only game of the series to be released in the US, has been rated by the ESRB for the Wii. While that seems to be a good indication the game is bound for the Virtual Console, we're not going to make that leap without an official confirmation from Nintendo. Besides, given the rabid fan base of the game here, we're half-serious when we say we suspect Nintendo might consider selling the game unchanged for $50 on a disc. We guarantee it would sell like gangbusters.
An ESRB rating is the only outside hurdle the Nintendo-owned property to putting it on the Virtual Console (if that's the route they take). Now wouldn't that make for a clever Mother's Day gift, hm?
The ESRB and National Institute on Media and the Family would like to remind (naïve) parents that Grand Theft Auto IV is not appropriate for children. In a joint statement by the two organizations, the groups point out GTA IV has been rated Mature for: Intense Violence, Blood, Strong Language, Strong Sexual Content, Partial Nudity and Use of Drugs and Alcohol. What 12-year-old wouldn't beg to play that? It sounds awesome!
The two organizations "encourage parents to be informed and exercise their discretion when considering the purchase of all M-rated games." The ESRB reminds that the average age of a gamer is now over 30 and that some titles are "clearly not intended" for kids. And GTA IV is clearly one of those games.
Last week we thought we had a better understanding of the ESRB's policy on DLC, namely that it has to stay within the game's rating or the title can be entirely re-rated. But ESRB president Patricia Vance has clarified the statement with MTV, saying that policy only applies if the content is part of a mandatory update. If it's optional, then just the content itself will have to carry a different rating.
This would seem to open the door for AO DLC, but it may be a moot point. At least one of the big three publishers (Microsoft) has already said it wouldn't allow that on its console. So those of you planning on buying the GTA IV DLC in the hopes of seeing some hardcore polygon on polygon action are just going to have to hold on to your ... points.
We've always been curious how the ESRB handles the rating of downloadable content, especially after the Ratatouille "Hobo Murder and Cleavage" DLC pack caused such a stir earlier this year. While speaking at the MI6 Conference last week ESRB president Patricia Vance explained, saying, "they have to keep the content in the downloadable product consistent with the core rating. It can't go out of bounds." Presumably, if content was bad enough the game would have to be entirely re-rated.
Here's what we find interesting: If a publisher wanted to release AO content, but were afraid that stores wouldn't carry it, could they wait until sales were on a downturn and then release the naughty DLC? Because if it has nudity or a way of murdering people we've never tried we are totally there.
The oft-proclaimed "Master of Horror" never was much of a gamer -- he'll be the first to admit that. That's probably for the best; it would be hard to consistently produce the pants-soiling stories he's known for if he spent his days wasting away in front of his computer, looking for a PUG for the Hellfire Citadel. However, that doesn't mean he'll sit idly by as the gaming industry gets remorselessly hassled by The Man.
In a recent column for Entertainment Weekly, Stephen King decried HB 1423, a pending bill in the Massachusetts state legislature, which would outright ban the sale of "violent video games" to minors -- effectively circumventing the ESRB ratings system altogether. King, who knows a thingor two about violence, dissects the bill as eloquently as you'd expect, saying that politicians use pop culture as a "whipping boy," to illicit a passionate response from fans of the beleaguered medium, and to ignore "the elephants in the living room." Wait, you mean the popularity of violent video games isn't the biggest crisis facing the country? Get out of town!
Each week Jeff Engel and Geoff Brooks rendez-vous on Joystiq to contribute Counting Rupees, a column on the business behind gaming:
The politics of video games are well covered by other websites, but it's worth spending a little time to think about the business implications of politics on the industry and its customers -- particularly in light of recent events like the UK game study. Just how much day-to-day impact does this maneuvering really have? For all of the angst found in the gamer community over issues like the latest ridiculous violent video game ban, I'd argue that the average gamer is actually pretty well-insulated from the mess.
So who does get affected? Well, the answer lies at least in part in figuring out the touch points that politics has on politicians, developers and publishers, and the people who buy and sell games in the first place. At its most basic, there are some essential conflicts of interest between these groups that get mediated by politics, and we can use them as the lens by which to think about this further.
Let's start off with consumers themselves. What do they really want? Well, game players want to be able to play whatever they want, whenever they want to play. But they're not the only stakeholders here; for younger players, parents play an important role as intermediaries in determining what games get purchased and thus what games are available. Parents, more than anything, want control: the ability to control what their children play and filter out products that they view as offensive or objectionable. Industry figures have similarly simple incentives. They want to satisfy players' demands and supply the games they want -- that's how they make money. It's in their best interests to avoid any restrictions whatsoever on what they can produce or how they sell it. Retailers also have to worry about their brand image and how they're publicly perceived, which is why Wal-Marts don't stock Adults-Only rated games.
The ESRB launched its very own widget today. just for those who can't help but obsessively check the ratings for games. The widget is available in several different formats (except OSX Tiger, a gaffe perhaps?) and easily embeddable, allowing users to search the 14,000 titles in the organization's database with ease.
The ESRB's Madame Patricia Vance explained that the group's research showed that 75% of parents regularly check game ratings to make sure the titles are appropriate for their children, expressing her belief that the widget will make things more convenient. It sure will! Especially in our normal checks to see what unannounced games the ESRB recently rated.
Posts with tag esrb
It's a sad day for those of us who think that a future world entirely populated by desensitized adults trained from birth to be killing machines would be totally sweet. A Federal Trade Commission "undercover shopper" study has found that retailers turned down kids trying to buy M-rated games 80 percent of the time, up 58 percent from the year prior and up from a surprising 16 percent in 2000.
Last week we thought we had a better understanding of the ESRB's policy on DLC, namely that it has to stay within the game's rating or the title can be entirely re-rated. But ESRB president Patricia Vance has clarified the statement with MTV, saying that policy only applies if the content is part of a mandatory update. If it's optional, then just the content itself will have to carry a different rating.
_thumbnail.jpg "i am 8-bit: 2008")
